AISubs v3.4
1996 FNS Improvisational Music Festival
What is it this time?
Yes, this is...
Yes.
In this festival, musicians representing Japan will be given songs improvised.
Yes, because it's FNS Improvisational Music Festival.
Yes.
Now, the theme of the song will be a hit song that everyone knows.
Yes.
We will have you give us a completely new song for that hit song.
That's how it is.
You will give us songs on the spot?
Yes, that's how it is.
First of all, let me introduce the judges who will judge this song.
Please introduce it.
Yes, first of all, the composer, Hiroo Masaaki- san!
Hello!
Even though you're a judge, you shouldn't be screaming like that!
Screaming like that!
Yes!
Next, the composer, Ryoko Mori Ryozo-san!
Hello!
You always have an accordion with you, don't you?
Yes, today I really want to do this.
Ah, is that so?!
Yes!
Thank you for having me.
And the actor, Minagishi Toru-san!
Good evening!
I thought he was a scary person, but he's not scary at all!
He's a normal old man.
You seem like you like laughing.
Yes, yes! I love laughing!
Nice to meet you!
Nice to meet you, too!
Next up is the singer, Shinohara Ryoko-san!
Yes, good evening!
The singer, Shinohara Ryoko-san...
Today, as a singer...
Yes, let's move on!
What is it?! What is it?!
You're a judge!
You're not a singer!
You're a singer, right?!
I love love, sadness, and coldness!
That's just one song!
Don't fall for that!
Let's do our best!
If you don't say it more and more...
Nice to meet you!
It's like I did something wrong!
Nice to meet you!
Next up...
There's one more important person...
He's the manager of entertainment, Sato Yoshikatsu-san!
Hello!
It's been a while, so you should be nervous.
Nervous?! That baldness makes me nervous!
Sato-chan, thank you for coming!
Thank you for having me!
That's it for the five judges!
Yes, that's right!
Now, let's...
Let's hear the results of the songs!
Everyone, please take a look!
Out of these sixteen songs...
Everyone will have to use this roulette to decide!
Yes!
You will have to choose from among these songs!
Now, first...
Yes!
Let's have one of the top batters appear!
Let's go!
First up is this person!
Please come out!
The second one is...
In a place like this, Kai Higashino is...
You all thought that Imadaya or Higashino would come out, didn't you?
You didn't think that, did you?!
Anyway, Kai-san, it's been 10 years since Kai-band reunited.
Ah, that's right.
By the way, you also have a concert, don't you?
We do have a concert.
August 10th and 11th.
Where?
In Odaiba...
Yes.
In Shinsha-ku.
Ah, Shinsha-ku.
You don't have to say anything!
Let's do it in Fuji-TV's Shinsha-ku!
It's been 10 years since Kai-band reunited!
Before that, is it okay for me to appear in a show like this?
That's right.
Okay, roulette.
Please roll and decide.
Let's go, roulette!
See you later!
You swam, Yaki kun!
Knowing the original song is hard, isn't it?
I'm Kai Yoshihiro and it's "More More Tonight"!
Let's go!
I want to stop and look at you
Like drawing a picture of pure love
Even on a desolate night
It's nice to have a laugh and talk
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whatever
Whoa, whoa, whoa, what's your name?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whatever
Whoa, yeah!
How did it go?
It was completely different, wasn't it?
Darn it!
Darn it! Well, it can't be helped.
Anyway, please listen to me, Hirao-san.
Hirao-san!
Yes!
It's too good, isn't it?
Isn't it?
It's too good, isn't it?
This is what a professional should say, isn't it?
Amateur Shinohara-kun.
Yes, I understand.
Hey, Ryoko! What are you staring at?!
You're Hirao Masaki!
I've only met you today.
Now, judges and teachers!
Scores!
Scores, please!
Ten points, nine points, ten points, ten points, ten points!
The total is forty-nine points!
Yes, thank you very much!
Thank you!
Thank you very much!
Let's go!
The second person is this person!
Please come in!
Now, the second person is Shodo Mayo-san!
Good evening.
Well, you've grown up now.
How is it? Are you a little nervous?
I don't know how to be nervous.
For now, you're starting to show something.
Yes.
Something like that, right?
It's like you're doing a bungee jump or something like that.
Like, "Hey, step forward!"
"Step forward?!" I see.
Please say it like that!
Now, let's have you decide on your place in the roulette!
Let's go! Roulette, start!
That's right.
Are you ready?
Yes, yes.
Well then, it's 365 marches at Shonomaya.
One step, three steps forward, two steps back
Life is one, two, punch
Sweat, kiss, walk
In your footsteps
Beautiful flowers will bloom
Wave your arms and raise your legs
One, two, one, two, don't rest and walk
One, two, one, two, one, two
Wonderful!
Wow, wonderful!
This is wonderful!
Is it?
I'm so glad!
I didn't expect you to put in a band-saw.
I did put in a band-saw, but...
You did it on your own, didn't you?
I'm sorry!
But you were right! It was wonderful! You were wonderful, too!
How about you, Mr. Minegishi?
I just realized for the first time...
I thought you were going to add lyrics to it.
I see.
Because it was the other way around!
You basically didn't know!
What are you talking about?
All right!
Now, let's see the judges' scores!
9 points, 10 points, 9 points, 10 points, 10 points!
The total is... 48 points!
That was close!
That was close, but it was wonderful!
Thank you very much!
Thank you!
Please go back to your seats.
I'm looking forward to the next performance!
The third performer is...
Who is it?!
Mr. Ueda Masaki!
Aren't they amazing?!
They are, aren't they?!
They are well-decided!
Yes.
You really thought they were judges?!
Yes, we did.
We thought they were judges.
So you came here and asked them to sing for you?
Yes, we asked them to sing for us.
That's amazing.
Well, it can't be helped, right?
Yes, it can't be helped.
You two have already sung before.
Well then, let's have you decide the lyrics with the roulette.
Then, start the roulette!
Yes, please press it.
No, that's enough.
Just once.
Just once is fine.
Ms. Sazae!
Mr. Ueda Masaki and Ms. Sazae have won!
Ms. Sazae has been doing this for decades now.
Your mother is laughing, too.
No, everyone is laughing.
Your mother isn't laughing, though.
Oh, Mr. Ueda!
Where did you see Ms. Sazae and your mother laughing?!
Well then, let's have you sing for us with the keyboard!
Yes, I'm Ueda Masaki and this is Ms. Sazae!
Let's compare!
Good morning!
This is the intro.
I'm chasing a stray cat.
I'm chasing it with bare feet.
I'm a strong support.
Everyone is laughing.
The sun is laughing, too.
Lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-la-la
It's fine today, too.
Ba-ba-ba-ban-ban-ban-ban-ban
Thank you!
Wonderful!
Well...
Mr. Sazae, what will you do?
I don't know what will happen, but...
No, no, no...
It's scary to compete where you came from.
I don't know what will happen.
I don't know if it's okay...
No! I think it's good.
I don't know if it's okay...
Oh, in yourself, right?
In myself...
I have a question.
Shinohara-san!
Yes!
How was it?
His voice...
It was a very pleasant voice...
Yes!
If you whispered in his voice...
It's no good.
What are you saying?!
It's no good.
I'm sorry, I'm a little weak.
Well...
Let's look forward to this score!
Yes!
Well then, judges!
Go ahead!
Please give us the score!
10 points! 10 points! 9 points! 10 points! 10 points!
The total is...
299 points!
Old man...
Old man, why 9 points?
At first, when the intro started...
Yes!
I thought he was translating Sazae-san in some country's language.
That's your own interpretation!
You don't know that!
That's how it is, but...
Next time we'll do it like that.
It's done!
Next time we'll do it like that.
Thank you very much!
Let's go to the next one!
Nishiyama-san...
Yes?
Please look at me.
I feel like I'm doing a wonderful singing show right now.
You're a wonderful member.
When I look at you like this...
This member, Koura...
Who on earth is sitting here?
Who could it be?
He's a musician who represents Japan.
Is that so?
Yes, today...
He's a fighter!
Let's call for him!
Yes! Let's go!
Who could it be?
Koura-san! Koura-san!
How is it? How is it? How is it?
How is it?
Which one of you is an otaku?
I came from Kamagasaki as a mascot.
Um...
What should I say?
When I was thinking of this project, I thought it would be cooler.
This program is brought to you by B&G, a company that lives in a world that expands.
Nisshin Foods, Nestle Japan...
Kobayashi Pharmaceutical, provided by Meiden Company.
This is really bad, isn't it?
Well, then...
Let's decide and play roulette!
Shall we?
Yes!
Are you okay with that?
Oh, yes...
I understand.
I can't give you such a long time!
Help me!
No, no, it's okay.
Well, then, let's go!
Yes! Roulette, start!
The song of challenge is...
"Champion"!
You don't have to say it out loud in the mirror.
Just say it out loud.
I'm taking compulsory education.
Oh, Masumoto-san, this is not a full-length segment.
Don't talk too much.
I'm anxious if I don't talk.
Well, then...
You guys usually stopped me.
Why am I trying to flow like this without stopping you?
No, you didn't stop me.
You just said "champion"
Oh, I see.
Mayo-san also flowed properly.
Well, then, Nishiyama-san, please.
Yes, then...
Masumoto Hitoshi-san is...
"Champion"!
No, now, wait a minute, the beginning is "shirashi"...
Now, the beginning is "tsukami" and "shirashi"...
I feel like it's similar, but thank you for that.
Everyone at the venue, please be quiet.
Yes, everyone, please be quiet, okay?
I'll say it again.
Yes, I'll sing it.
Yes! Matsumoto Hitoshi-san is the champion!
I caught you, Matsumoto Hitoshi-san.
You... you can't do it!
Don't say that one line!
Matsumoto Hitoshi-sensei is the champion!
Go ahead!
I'll untie your hot arms and you'll leave.
In your slightly trembling white gown,
I saw your age and your sadness.
I'm going to...
You haven't finished yet!
I swallowed it and said...
You're talking about it again!
You are king of kings!
Stand up!
One more time!
With those legs!
Stand up!
Let your life's fire burn up!
Thank you!
I don't think there were many parts of the song, but...
There were a lot of stories.
"Stand up!" She said.
I think the rest of the song was good.
Judge! Ms. Hirao!
Well... "Wasei Elvis Presley"...
The rest is decided.
Oh, is it decided?
It's decided. My waist was a little high, but...
The second flag is Yoko's.
Let's ask Yoko-san, too.
Somehow... I felt like a rival.
A rival appears?!
Yes!
Now, "Wasei"! Judges and judges!
Please give us your scores!
10 points, 9 points! 10 points, 9 points! 6 points! 10 points, 8 points!
What?! 6 points?!
43 points!
Now, Ms. Hirao!
Please ask the judges!
There are two people with 49 points, so...
Let's have the judge and Ms. Hirao announce it!
Please!
Ms. Kai's "Wow Wow" is really...
She makes me forget it. It's wonderful.
Ms. Ueda's song is really beautiful, but...
As a theme song, I felt like it wasn't very energetic.
I see.
Ms. Kai's...
Ms. Kai Ueshiba's entrance!
Congratulations!
That's all for tonight. This has been the 96th Emeritus Lecture Session!
What's up with you and your husband?
- Not good at all. - Not good?
- No, it's sex. - Sex?
- It's popular. - Not good at all.
- I like it alone.
- You like it alone? - Yes.
Good morning, everyone!
- Good morning! - Good morning!
We're going to have you help us from now on.
- Yes. - Mr. Azuma.
- Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you, too.
- I'm Azuma. - Mr. Ota, teach him.
- Yes, I'm Ota. - Nice to meet you, Mr. Ota.
- Nice to meet you, Mr. Azuma. - Nice to meet you, Mr. Azuma.
- I don't have much to say, but... - Yes?
Just remember that you have to convey it well.
- The message... - That's right.
- Of course. - Yes.
- One person is two yen, so one time. - One time.
- One time, two yen. - One time, two yen.
- Thank you.
- Put it here. - Put it here.
- He put it himself. He put it himself. - You put it yourself?
- Yes. - I see.
- Yes. - That's great.
- If you put too much, even if it's necessary, like you guys...
- yes? - Just say what you want.
- I will. - Really?
- What can I say... - Don't start a fight.
- Don't start a fight? - Yes.
- Good luck. Good luck.
- Please. - Thank you.
- Thank you.
We do not have any new messages for you.
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Come on, Teles. Do it!
Next person, please!
Hey!
You look good!
Hey!
Yes?
Is it fun to do all of this?
No, it's not fun.
You're wasting your time.
I'm not wasting my time.
The TV show you watched this morning is...
"Mitchan's Meal".
It's a heroine audition!
Today, Azami will...
Don't call me "Azami", old man!
Don't call me that!
You're misunderstanding something.
What do you mean?
There are...
quite a few...
Do you even need "a few"?!
A heroine audition is a small thing!
What's wrong with you, old man?!
Azami, Azami...
You're doing this everywhere!
Hey, say something else!
You're wasting your time.
Right?
Is that enough?
No?
Today is completely different from before.
You can't even accept this!
You don't know?!
You can't accept it!
You brought it!
It's a useless thing!
If you open it up and see, you can't take it home...
If you like it, what do you want me to do?
That's...
Catch your dream!
You've won again, old man!
Yum!
Go home!
Yes, sir!
Get sick, you bastards!
Go to bed!
Azami, do you want me to help you?
Do you want me to help you?
Can you do it?
Go home!
You don't seem to understand us.
You're busy.
Do you want me to do it?
Go home!
Yes, sir!
Get sick, you bastards!
Go home!
You don't seem to understand us.
Advice!
To be honest, I got a lot of that round.
It seems like he's been studying you a lot.
So, in the next round, as soon as you start singing, just corner him and say you like her.
No way!
It's cold!
(singing)
Taxi!
Hey, taxi!
Where are you going, sir?
To pick up my sister.
I don't know!
Stop it! It's cold!
(singing)
I can't sing!
(singing)
Ah, art museum!
Ah, so this is the art museum.
Come in!
Is this the audition venue?
Come in!
Nice to meet you.
Ah!
Hello!
I'm in the middle of something!
What?
I haven't fallen yet!
Nice to meet you.
Come in!
I'm Kumi-chan.
Kumi-chan, right?
How old are you?
I'm fourteen years old.
Fourteen years old.
Do you have anything in particular?
Actually, yes.
I'm a piano player.
Ah, piano!
Then can you play a little for me?
Yes!
Do your best, Kumi-chan!
Yes!
She's good.
Ah, right! She's been playing the piano since she was three years old!
She's good.
Half-neck!
(singing)
Today we're going to play the Perlman Game.
Perlman Game!
Atsumi Miya.
Adachi Kuwai.
Izumi Ayako-chan.
Yes.
Asahi Chizuru-chan.
Yes.
Sometimes...
It's a circle.
Yes.
In the beginning, I'm Perlman No. 1.
Yes.
Someone else is Perlman No. 2.
No. 2.
Someone else is Perlman No. 3.
No. 3.
Someone else is Perlman No. 3.
Booby!
I'm Booby!
So we're both Booby here.
Boogie!
That's all I have to say.
And I'm still Perlman No. 1.
Perlman No. 2.
We're going to repeat this over and over again.
Yes.
We're not going to do it without alcohol or women.
Perlman No. 1!
Perlman No. 2!
Perlman No. 3!
Booby!
Boogie!
Perlman No. 1!
Perlman No. 2!
Perlman No. 3!
Boogie!
That's all I have to say.
Excuse me.
- Two people. - Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey.
Hey, hey.
You are Power Man.
Anyway,
you're
I was super mad!
You're funny!
I get it! I get it!
It was really funny!
Maokai and I were like, "Ughi! Ughi!"
We all laughed.
- PAMA one. - PAMA two. - PAMA three. - BOOBIE. - BOOBIE!
- There you go! - You're doing it wrong!
- Sorry! - There you go!
- I didn't do it! - Ouch, ouch!
Ouch, ouch!
Well, I had that much.
Don't mess with me!
Hey, Tsuyoshi! Tsuyoshi!
Tsuyoshi!
Ouch, ouch! The camera's not on, who is it?
Today's "g" badge goes to... Kimura-kun! Thank you very much!
Thank you, thank you very much, everyone.
Welcome back, welcome back!
Now for the second one.
Jesse Buccio! Over the Galaxy!
Jesse Buccio!
You got a "g" badge for taking Makayama Miho's sister, didn't you?
Jesse Buccio!
Tonight's game is balls, you know lots of it, what's honey?
You're aware of what'll win, pole, walk across, that's the pole, get points!
The more pole you get, the more points!
But beware of the pole breaking, if you fall, then you fell, game over and...
So, ladies and gentlemen, Galaxy's Fundamental, your polkero!
Now, for the "g" badge, both teams will go first!
Ready, set...
Go!
Huh? It's moving.
What are you doing?
Don't look at me, I'm not turning the camera!
It's live, it's live.
Can you do it?
Here.
No, no, here.
Hey, shut up!
You haven't fallen yet!
You haven't touched anything!
Go! Go! Go!
I'm scared! I'm scared! I'm scared!
No, you can do it! You can do it!
Actually, you're not scared at all!
You can do it! You can do it! Not at all!
You can do it at all!
I don't want it anymore! I don't want it anymore!
Can you do it faster?!
No, but Ryogo, you haven't...
I can't do it!
You haven't touched anything!
You haven't even touched it!
I'm working in a time loop!
Ryogo!
Go home and do it!
Okay!
Go home and do it!
Okay! Clear!
Your height is 45cm!
Huh?
Okay! Let's go! Let's make a team!
I'm scared! I'm scared!
But you haven't touched anything!
You haven't touched anything!
Not again!
Oh, you did it now!
Now?!
Oh, you did it now!
You did it now!
Oh, you did it now!
I'm going! I'm going!
Go! Go! Go!
Let's do it!
Okay! Let's do it!
Oh, I'm embarrassed!
You did it!
What's wrong?!
You did it?!
Alright, let's make some money here.
Let's go as far as we can.
No, I want to go home, but I can't.
Are you alright? Are you really worried about me?
Why are you doing this, you idiot?
Are you alright?
Are you an idiot?
Go back! Go back! Go back!
Go back! Go back!
Where did you go?
What is it?
One more sleep and you'll be fine.
It's quite long.
One more!
He took it off!
What? What?
Take it off! Take it off!
I already took it off!
Take it off! Take it off!
I can't take it off! My legs...
I can't!
Take it off! Take it off!
I want to go home! I want to go home!
I want to go home!
Ready!
Go!
Take it off! Take it off!
I'm scared!
Hey you!
He's a tsumasaki!
It's not enough!
You're wearing a jikata!
What is it?
He's scared! He's scared!
Take it off! Take it off!
How is it?
Jack! Jack!
You're wearing a jikata!
Take it off! Take it off!
Take it off!
Take it off! Take it off!
I already took it off!
Take it off! Take it off!
I'm taking it off!
Go!
What are you doing?
Go!
Go more delicately!
You're too rough!
Treat her like a lady.
Go!
Come back! Come back!
Come back!
I got it! I got it!
Come back!
Go for it!
Dangerous
Auto exchange!
I didn't mean to be stupid.
You were too serious.
What?
Slowly, slowly, slowly!
It's okay! It's okay!
Slowly!
You're good! You're good!
Wake up! Wake up!
If you sit there, your weight will change!
Wait a minute!
Bring me a guitar!
Why?!
Your shoulders are red!
Your shoulders are red! Your shoulders are red!
Stand up!
Good! Good! Good!
You can do it! You can do it!
It came off! It came off!
It's over...
It will never come off again.
I won't let you show me like this ever again!
That was a tie. One more to go.
Why are you doing this to me?
It's over! Bring it back!
I can't reach it at all!
You can do it! You can do it!
Can you go up on the first floor?
Go up?
If you can't stand up, go up to the edge as much as you can!
What's wrong?
That's it!
No, no, no!
I can't reach it!
You can't stop it with your arms!
I can't reach it!
Are you stupid?!
You're exposed!
One, two...
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
And so, the winner of this match is... TEAM HAMADA!
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Actually, it's not because I lost. That tree is mine!
I'm sorry!
I'm sorry, too!
I'm sorry!
I'm sorry, too!
That's my tree!
Bring it here!
That's right. You're putting too much pressure on the band.
Whose tree is this?
That's my family tree!
Which family tree?
I'm sorry, mister!
I'm sorry!
I know!
I'm a financial man, too!
I'll give you back 40 million yen today!
Yes!
I know!
You drank a lot of sweet stuff, too.
Let's stop here.
Goodbye!
Yasue!
Yes?
Where's Keisuke?
I don't know.
Where's that octopus walking?
I'm back.
Keisuke, you're late!
Where's the money?
Hurry up!
What's wrong?
Weren't you suspicious of Tachikoro?
Yes.
I was worried you'd expose me in your play.
Yatsue!
Yes?
Take this 40 million yen to Onda's father.
Wait a minute.
30 million yen for President Morishita...
What are you going to do about it?
What are you talking about, Tako?
What are you going to do about it if you give it to someone who doesn't even have a record of giving it back?
What is this?
Give me this 20 million yen.
20 million yen is a promise of 30 million yen!
If you don't give me 30 million yen, that factory over there is going to collapse!
We're going to collapse!
Because we sold that store to the land!
If we give it back and the other side comes up with it, we'll be in trouble too!
What are you talking about?
We don't know if we'll go bankrupt!
You don't know...
Yatsue!
What are you going to do about this 20 million yen?
What are you going to do about this 20 million yen that was sold to China?
Do you want to start over with me?
Stop it!
So you guys really can do it!
Hey, Yatsue!
Listen up.
I owe this guy 20 million yen.
I know I haven't sold it to you yet, but...
I'll take your body.
You're disgusting!
You're the one who owes me money!
Come on!
You're crazy!
I'm not scared!
I'm just exhausted.
Exhausted!
Come back! Come back!
I like you so much!
What?
Your face is disgusting!
What are you doing?
You're losing! You're losing!
Come back! Come back! Come back!
I like you so much!
Bakuchi-ko!
Parma-niro!
Parma-dango!
Hambi!
These guys have gone mad!
Yeah, they've gone mad!
This program is brought to you by P&G, a world of flash.
Nisshin Foods.
Nestle Japan.
Kobayashi Pharmaceuticals.
Provided by Meiden Company.