AISubs v3.4
Here we go.
Five seconds. Four, three, two, one.
Teacher, is this a lion?
Yes, it's a very rare sight.
A lion has fallen under a child's cliff.
It's currently being trained.
Teacher, a lion has climbed up.
This little lion also works hard.
When this little lion climbs up,
first of all, it does a headbutt.
It waits until it has completely climbed up,
and then it does a spinning kick.
This is terrible.
First of all, it stands up.
It stands up for a moment.
And then it does an elbow with its feet up.
An elbow with its feet up?
Thank you for your hard work!
Yay! A wild lion has appeared!
Here we go. Ten seconds. Eight, seven, six...
Five seconds. Four, three, two...
Oh!
Sensei, this is a lion, isn't it?
Yes, it is. This is a very rare sight.
A lion trains a lion.
This is a rare sight.
I think you all know it well, but this VTR is quite rare.
A lion's parents push a lion down a cliff, and only the lion that comes up is raised.
Now, a lion is about to come up.
Oh, this is rare. This is lucky.
Sensei, what do you do with this?
A lion doesn't wait for it to come up.
It kicks a lion's head and pushes it down again.
This is a rare sight.
It's crazy.
But a lion doesn't lose.
Sensei, a lion will come up again.
A lion will come up again.
A lion works hard.
But you think you'll do it again, don't you?
Yes.
But you think you'll do it again, don't you?
Yes.
But you keep looking at it.
You keep looking at it.
You think it's kind of nice, and you stand up.
You stand up.
Yes, yes, yes.
But you think it's over, and you kick it down again!
This is...
Oh! It kicked it where it was needed!
It kicked it where it was needed!
Where it was needed?
Oh, it fell!
It fell!
You fell!
But a lion comes up again very quickly.
It comes up again!
It comes up again and again.
It looked like an escape just now, but...
No, no, this is different.
It's different, isn't it?
It comes up.
You're kind, aren't you, lion?
Look at that...
Lion's negative laugh.
By the way, now it's going to lay down where it came up.
Now it's going to lay down.
On its back?
It's going to lay down on its back.
It's going to lay down on its back and then it's going to enter the face.
Face?
You're not going to rub it in, are you?
That's right.
You're going to rub the lion's crotch in.
I'm not rubbing it in!
This is...
This is what a lion is trained for!
No, this is going to be quite a burden.
It's not a burden.
And then, what you do next is...
You push an old, nostalgic electric hammer.
This is nostalgic!
These days, you don't get to see things like this very often.
Isn't it impossible for a lion to do this?
It's impossible, isn't it?
That's scary, isn't it?
And then, I prepared this in advance.
I have a hammer.
You prepared that in advance?
Yes, and I'm going to hit it a hundred times with this hammer.
You're going to hit it a hundred times from behind?
Yes, I'm going to hit it a hundred times with this hammer.
This is pretty effective!
Teacher! Teacher!
Teacher!
Something came out of behind you!
Oh, it came out! It came out!
Yes!
This is...
What is it? What is it?
It's a crane rabbit!
Oh! Huh?!
It's a cute one, isn't it?
Oh, wait a minute!
It looks like the lion is quite angry.
Oh, it looks like the lion is quite angry.
The lion seems to have thought that the lion was a crane.
That means, teacher, that is...
Yes, yes, yes.
Today, it was a simple reason that there were members other than the crane.
But, look!
The regular members are all here, aren't they?
Oh!
The power of the north and east...
Huh?
Is anyone missing?
Well, well, it can't be helped!
Let's continue with the hammer!
That's right!
Let's continue with the hammer!
Let's continue with the hammer and hit it a hundred times!
Wait, teacher!
Teacher!
Yes, yes, yes!
The lion seems to not know what to do!
Well, we don't know who the opponent is, so...
It looks like it's quite anxious!
It looks like it's quite muscular, too!
Teacher, I'm curious about this lion!
Who is it?
This is...
Yes, yes.
Actually, it's Sakamoto Ryuichi.
What?!
No way!
I don't know what you're talking about!
This is...
Sensei, this isn't funny at all.
Even if it's not funny, I'm going back.
I'm angry because Komuro cheated me.
This is...
I thought you were Kong Kong.
You're lying!
Well, sometimes things like this happen on this show.
I personally don't want to see that face of yours.
You didn't say anything yesterday!
You were a professor?
Of course!
You're not cool at all!
You're not cool at all.
Thank you for coming today.
Okay!
Okay my ass!
[Advertisement]
YO! YO! YO! HERE! THEY! ARE!
SHINGO MADA, IMADA, KUDAMO, AND YOU!
AND YO! YO! YO! THEY'RE VERSUS KI MATSUMOTO, ITAO, HIGASHIRO, AND RYUKO!
YO! WHO'S GONNA WIN? WHO'S GONNA LOSE? NO ONE KNOWS! LET THE BATTLES BEGIN! CHECK IT OUT!
TONIGHT'S BUSY GAME IS HACHIMETSU DAIMYUKAI!
FEATURING THREE GAMES - HACHIMETSU SUNOHIKI, HACHIMETSU PANKUI, and HACHIMETSU TAMAIDE - WHICH TEAM WILL BLEED TO DEATH?!
TONIGHT'S ANTIVIOUS OF A PUNKY PRESENT - IT'S TIME TO JAM, IT'S TIME TO SLAM, IT'S TIME TO PUMP IT UP!
FIRST ROUND - HACHIMETSU SUNOHIKI!
SECOND ROUND - HACHIMETSU SUNOHIKI!
Which team will bleed to death?!
First of all...
First of all, this one!
Stop it!
Stop it! You're cute!
The wind blew straight over there!
The savants sat in front of it...
...and they put on their headbands...
...so we could change our positions with them.
And you should have take those away!
Speak properly!
It's expensive!
Just make it count okay?
You're the one who said you wanted to be active...
...ever since I bestowed you!
How many times have you said it?!
- I don't know. - I said I don't know!
- Who's going to say it? - One, two...
One, two... Ryoko!
- One, two... - One, two...
- Say it! - Say it!
It's painful...
Game, game...
Ryoko, you're ugly!
You're ugly!
You're ugly! You're ugly! You ugly woman!
Let's do it!
You're ugly! You ugly woman!
The second round, Hachome's Funkin' Game!
The opponent is... Funkin' Kyosuke!
- What's wrong? - Yes.
- This bread is spinning around me. - Yes.
- Everyone is tied up behind me. - Yes.
- I can't use my hands. - Yes.
- What's wrong? - I can't get in this red circle.
- Yes. - Yes.
- I'll take the bread from the outside with my mouth. - Yes.
- Yes.
- Is it okay? - Yes.
- I'll win this round. - Yes.
- I'm scared. - No.
- Is it okay for me to be this close? - No.
- I'm scared. - No.
- Let's go! - I'm scared.
- Ready... - Ready...
- Go! - Go!
Thank you very much!
Hachateche! Tamaide!
OK, OK, OK.
This is "tamaide"!
"Tamaide"!
OK?
OK.
Put it in the opponent's team.
OK.
I'll put it in with a lot of weight.
OK.
Not like "paan"!
OK.
Put it in one by one.
Got it.
It's one-by-one now.
OK.
Now, over there...
One, two...
East!
One, two...
East!
It's one-by-one now!
OK, last shot!
OK!
Ready...
Go! Go! Go! Go!
Wow!
Hurry up and drop it! Hurry up and drop it!
I'm going to die!
What is it?
In front of you! In front of you! In front of you!
Today, we have a special guest!
This time, it's two against one!
Akashio Rock!
Today's winner is Ryoko, isn't it?
What?
Wait a minute.
Why?
I really thought about it.
I've decided it for a long time.
Is it Ryoko?
Today's winner is Ryoko, isn't it?
Congratulations, Ryoko Ishinohara!
What's this?
Congratulations!
Since its discovery, Paimon has been dragging animals to the bottom of hell.
And today, a new victim is...
Ouch!
What's going on, Paimon?!
What's going on?!
Ouch!
Blue... Blue... Blue...
No reaction!
Hey, eastern bee...
Go wherever you like.
I don't know where.
Go wherever you like.
No! Where do you want to go, eastern bee?
Where do you want to go, Ryoko?
No! Where do you want to go, eastern bee?
Where do you want to go, Ryoko?
No! Eastern bee!
You're so cute!
No! Eastern bee!
What's going on? You said you were having a reunion party.
Who are you?
Hey! Who are you?
Who are you?
I am... eastern bee's girlfriend.
What do you mean?
What do you mean? Are you flirting with me?
No!
No, I'm not flirting with you!
I don't believe you!
No, eastern bee...
I don't believe you!
I'll give you a man like you who doesn't know anything.
I don't like you!
I think you should take off your clothes whenever you appear in any program.
If you're going to take off your clothes, you should've told me before you took them off.
I'll give you a man like you!
What are you talking about?
This guy, you know...
I'm going to go to the bathroom.
Go to the bathroom!
I'm not joking! I'm not talking about sexual massage!
This guy, you know...
You know, I put my father's number in the telephone book I got from the show.
And the reference number I called was...
3671...
Samurai?!
I'm not joking!
What are you talking about?
This guy, you know...
I called his house at 10 at night when I heard his number!
His wife came out and he was already asleep.
Oh, I see...
It's early in the morning, so you go to bed at 10.
I'm not joking!
I'm being used!
This guy, you know...
I'm not joking!
This guy, you know...
I'm not joking!
I did it!
Futa, don't be late!
Futa!
No!
It hurts!
You scared me!
You're crazy!
It hurts!
What about you?
What?
I'm going to die soon.
Don't be stupid!
It's a lie. I know! I'm going to die soon!
What are you saying?!
Today, the number one person in the world will come and visit you!
It's a lie!
It's not a lie!
The number one person in the world won't come!
The number one person in the world will come!
Hello!
You're really number one in the world!
No...
This year, I almost came in third.
This year, I came in first, too.
Congratulations!
But...
How can you come in first in the world?
Hmm...
For example, there are people in fifth place in the world, right?
But...
Even if those people are in fifth place in the world...
I'm in first place in the world.
There are people in South America who say I'm in eighth place in the world.
It's not a lie.
I'm in first place in the world.
Hmm...
When I think about it...
I was made to start from seventeenth place in the world.
That's right.
That was the hardest time for me.
I often...
Got bullied by people in twelfth place in the world.
Hmm...
At that time...
I always stayed in ninth place in the world.
That's right.
Mr. World No. 1, can you shake my hand?
I'll do my best.
You did.
Gabare.
Yes?
I was 9th last year.
I'm 1st.
This year you're 9th?
I'm 1st.
What if I was 2nd last year?
I'm world no. 1.
It's not 2nd.
Mr. World No. 1.
Yes?
Can I be world no. 1 too?
Excuse me.
Hello?
What?
There's someone who says I'm 2nd?
Who is it?
A woman in 7th place?
Is that what she says?
What does she say?
Okay.
I'll be right there.
Excuse me.
Professor!
This is bad!
A Godzilla has appeared in Tokyo Bay!
He'll land in 30 minutes!
I see.
What should we do?
In that case...
Put sesame seeds in it!
Understood!
I'll put sesame seeds in it!
Hello?
Put sesame seeds in it!
Professor!
What kind of sesame seeds?
Black!
Black sesame! Put black sesame in it!
Professor!
What?
What kind of way of putting it?
Burn it!
Burn it and put it in!
Professor!
What?
Something serious happened again!
What?
There is a violent terrorist who is trying to assassinate the Prime Minister!
What should we do?
Assassinate... I see...
Send melon!
It's about sending melon!
What?
What is the professor's real name, you three?
I've said it many times, but it's Tezuka!
His real name is Tezuka!
Melon!
Is it bad?
Melon!
He's walking like an old man.
His face is scary.
He's running away.
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
I'm sorry!
In a way, he's scary.
His face is scary.
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
I'm leaving soon.
What time do you think it is now?
It's already 3 o'clock, isn't it?
2 o'clock?
In the middle of the night?
Thank you very much for joining us today.
I asked you for a lot of things.
I asked you to play catch with me.
30,000 yen is not enough for you?
You want me to play catch with you for 30,000 yen?
Is it okay for you to say that?
But you have to make it easy for me.
My staff told me so.
Can you give me 10,000 yen?
If you give me up to 10,000 yen...
Please send me the newspaper's director.
Thank you very much.
I'll do it at 2:15.
Now, this is it.
As much as I do sex, I also want to be involved in the Sankei newspaper.
Now, young people are working hard.
Good morning, everyone!
By the way, where is Sato, who gave me a toothpick?
Sato, come here!
Why do you give me a toothpick?
Didn't you ask me for a toothpick?
Show me your face!
How much do you give me?
I just gave you 300 toothpicks.
300?
Out of them, about 100.
Me?
Yes.
Toothpick?
Yes.
Oh, I see.
Yes.
I'm sorry.
That's why I'm here.
I'm sorry.
Hey, don't take it from me!
Did you get it?
I haven't checked it yet.
It's not in there!
Didn't I tell you?
It's not in there!
That's weird. Why is it in there?
No, Mr. Hamada's bike is over there.
Are you mocking me?
You're taking it with you?
That's right.
Let me ride with you!
You idiot!
This is the worst!
I want to go home!
It's here.
- Here? - Yes.
- Is this the first house? - Yes.
I...
I wrote this down.
Please take it.
Thank you very much.
Sure.
- Are you ready? - Yes.
- Good luck. - Thanks.
Who are you?
I'm riding with you.
Come with me.
Take it all!
There are only five left.
There is one left in the basket.
If only I could stop this shaking.
This is not like that.
You have to go beyond that.
What if it shakes again tomorrow?
Newspaper.
This is too scary.
Wait a minute.
What does this mean?
Leave your diary here.
Isn't this what Nakazawa-san said?
It's at the top again.
Are you serious?
Bastards!
Hey, hey, hey.
What are you looking at?
It's pretty dark in here.
It's 4:20 in the morning, isn't it?
What do you think of it?
It's pretty cool, isn't it?
What do you think of it?
Are you coming with me?
Yes, I am.
There are the most people here.
I'm going to the 4th floor, you go to the 3rd.
I'm counting on you.
Have you finished your safety check?
No, I haven't.
Have you finished your safety check?
No, I haven't.
Are you sure you can afford it?
I'm coming with you.
What?
Are you crazy?
Do you want to go up there?
Up there?
Get out of my way.
But...
Well...
The last word...
Mr. Usugi.
Oh, you're back already?
- Good job. - I'm tired, but...
It was tough.
- Are you all right? - Huh?
- Are you all right? - No, no...
But...
- I had a good sweat, right? - Yeah.
- I'm glad you're all right. - Yeah.
Did I stand up for you?
- Come in. - Thank you.
Don't be shy.
- Good job. - Thank you.
- Are you all right? - Seriously?
Well, after all the hard work...
- Thank you all for coming. - Thank you.
Mom...
This cup...
- You didn't like it, did you? - I didn't like it.
What?
It was good, wasn't it?
- By the way... - Yes?
You know...
I'm about to retire.
I have to start a business.
- That's why you came, right? - That's right.
You know...
Give me the money.
Wait a minute.
Here you go.
How much is it?
Two thousand yen.
Here you go.
You said one thousand yen.
I helped you.
What?
I helped you.
You helped me?
You were there.
I went four times and you were there.
I helped you when you fell down the hill.
I helped you.
Here you go.
You gave me eight thousand yen.
I only have seven thousand yen left.
I was counting on you.
Here you go.
Mom, I made you dinner.
It's good.
Yes, it's good.
I made you egg rice.
I'm tired.
I think I'm going to throw up.
I can't do it.
I'm going to throw up.
No, you're not.
I'm going to throw up.
(gibberish)
(laughter)
(gibberish)
Panic! Panic!
Panic!
(gibberish)
(laughter)
(gibberish)
Now, let's introduce today's cooking teacher!
Cassie Tsukamoto from Shimanto River!
Sushi! Sushi!
I'll eat your ass!
I'm sorry.
What are you talking about?
Who's toning?
Look at me!
Don't look at me!
I'm really surprised.
It's going to rain.
Oh, really?
It's going to rain this month.
I'm sorry. It's mid-autumn.
Oh, is that so?
It's going to rain.
Now, let's introduce today's cooking teacher!
You know, today...
It's my job, but since there are many happy things happening,
I thought I'd make something happy today.
Is that why you're happy today?
That's right! I'm very happy!
Teacher, let me hear you!
What is it?
Please push this button.
Yosuke-san! Yosuke-san!
Teacher, please tell us something happy.
You know...
I'm going to be in a music video.
I'm going to make a lot of money.
But...
You don't think I'm popular, do you?
No, I don't!
I'm amazing!
I was picked up the other day.
You're amazing!
That's right!
Where is it?
Shibuya!
In Shibuya?
You know, I'm also a coward.
You know...
I'm not a sexy dynamite!
You're right!
I envy you!
Men do come to you.
You know, you were so pale.
Don't pull my hand! Put it on!
You know...
I'll take a shit in front of the station and come back.
That's what I'll do.
But you shouldn't go to Shibuya anymore.
Yosuke-san is here!
Wow! Wow! Wow!
Wow!
You know...
I'm so powerful today!
Power, right?
Of course!
Well, teacher...
It's time for a happy meal, but...
Yes! Yes!
Will you make it for me today?
Please, teacher!
Speaking of happy meal...
What is a happy meal?
Of course...
A wedding or something like that...
Yes! It's a happy meal!
What do you serve at such occasions?
I knew it!
Oseki-han!
It's Oseki-han!
That's right!
That's right, dear!
It's Oseki-han!
Yes!
Then let's all sing Oseki-han's song!
Oseki-han!
Cry, you!
You be Oseki-han and cry!
Then let me ask you...
What would you do if you woke up in the morning and became Oseki-han?
I'd cry.
You'd cry?
That's why I'd cry!
La-la-la-la-la! Oseki-han!
Damn you!
He's a roadside professional!
Roadside professional!
That's enough! Bring me Oseki-han!
Yes, teacher!
Yes!
I'm Oseki-han, and I'm going to study with you all today!
Yes!
Today's topic is Oseki-han fried rice!
Oseki-han fried rice!
It's Oseki-han fried rice!
You're going to make Oseki-han fried rice?
That's right! I love Oseki-han fried rice!
This is delicious, dear!
I love Oseki-han fried rice!
Yes!
The content of the video is also Oseki-han fried rice, right?
Oseki-han fried rice...
You like it?
I like it.
But you won't lend it to me, right?
That's right!
Oseki-han fried rice...
I understand!
Then please start the fire!
Yes! I'll start the fire!
Yes!
Wow, this is amazing!
Is it okay? Is it okay?
Yes!
Then, oil...
Then, I'll add a little oil.
Yes!
I added a little oil.
Yes!
Is it okay?
Not yet, teacher!
Please heat it up a little more!
Yes!
Should I wait for the frying pan to heat up?
That's right!
Yes!
I got it!
Ah!
Ah! I'm sorry!
Are you okay?
Yes!
Right, Ryogo-chan?
Oseki-han fried rice...
When you see it, you get excited, right?
Why are you...
Why are you crying?!
Because I was about to cry...
Because you were about to cry...
Well...
Because I was about to cry...
It might come out on its own...
Because you were about to cry...
Damn it!
It doesn't matter! I'll do it!
What?!
Because you heated it up!
I heated it up!
And you, Oseki-han...
Ah!
Pull it out!
You're doing a pretty good job!
Don't just stand there! Come here!
Pink...
I thought you were pink.
I changed my clothes.
No, you haven't changed at all.
You haven't changed at all.
You've always been pink.
You've always been blue.
I want to be a huge man.
No, you can't.
My stomach hurts!
It hurts!
I knew it.
It's like hell. It's like hell.
See you later.
Yes!
Why don't you cry, Ryogo?
What should I do?
I'm crying all of a sudden.
Who is this?
Actually, this is Sakamoto Ryuichi.
What?
No, you can't.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
We're in trouble.
What are we going to do if we can't catch them?
Here?
If we can catch them here, we can catch them all.
It is about five seconds before the first Thursday.
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