AISubs v3.4
...dance is. ...dansu wa. ...dance is.
I can't dance well.
I'm waiting for Candy-san.
Is this a date?
No, it's not like that.
Candy-san, it's your birthday today.
Damn old man, is it your birthday today?
Damn old man, how old are you? Do you know me?
You're 24 years old, aren't you?
You're older than me.
Forty-three!
It's not like that!
It's a date. Let's play together.
Stop it!
I'm sick of it!
What are you doing?
It's not like that.
It's not like that!
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
Damn you!
I'm sorry.
It's hot.
Welcome.
May I help you?
Lemon scotch!
Lemon scotch, right? What is it?
Royal milk tea.
May I help you?
Have you been waiting for me?
No, I haven't been waiting for you at all.
What is this?
Candy-san, happy birthday!
Thank you!
May I open it?
Go ahead!
Wow!
Wow! Cake!
How do you know my birthday?
Yes, it's written in the movie pamphlet.
Movie?
Candy-san, I may not be allowed to say this, but I hate Nikita-san and Lily-san.
Why?
Because they always tell lies.
Candy-san is 43 years old. She says she's an all- titan and a tame.
There's no way that's true!
If only I had touched her...
She always tells lies.
It's a lie, isn't it?! It's a lie, isn't it?!
It's for me, Chairman Debanomi.
It's a lie! It's a lie! Candy-san is 24 years old!
Tamotsu-kun, I've been telling a lot of lies and hurting people.
But I've never regretted it. Not even once.
But now, for the first time, I'm regretting my own lies.
I'm a sinful woman, aren't I?
But lies don't always hurt people.
Tamotsu-kun...
Candy-san...
I don't care about the dirt on my back.
My big bones...
You're a workaholic, aren't you?!
What's wrong with you?!
Candy-san!
I hate you!
Candy-san!
(crying)
This program is brought to you by...
...B and G...
...wrestle japan...
...misshin food...
...famous trains...
...and Lotte.
Judge Kouhei here!
Now, let me introduce today's chess game!
Judge Kouhei, I have a question for you.
Insects can do a lot of things, but the most popular ones are beetles and beetles.
Which insect is the champion of which insect?
Please make it clear to me in the match!
I don't care about the same insect!
This chess game was given to me by the 64-year-old Saotome Hikoroku of Nerimaku.
Thank you very much!
Now, let me make it clear to you in the match!
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
Which insect is Mr. Kabutomushi's...
Mr. Kabutomushi, you should listen to the song first!
Mr. Kabutomushi, today's song is also difficult!
In English, "kabutomushi" means "beetle", and "beetle" means "beetle".
Where did you learn that song?
I didn't learn it!
It's been hard for you lately, hasn't it?
The song...
But Mr. Kuwagata...
It's perfect!
Oh, it's true!
Now, let me introduce...
Mr. Kuwagata's entrance!
Hey, you!
Yes, yes!
Don't go up there just because a big shot from the Tokyo office is here!
What's this?
Go up there, you idiot!
I'm going up there for a bit!
You know...
I've always been weak against that guy!
Your eyes are a little teary!
You really are weak!
It's okay!
Do as usual!
Yes, please do as usual!
Well, well!
I'll do my best for everything!
Yes, yes!
Is that okay with you?
Yes!
Mr. Kabutomushi and Mr. Kuwagata!
Yes!
Make sure you wear white clothes today as well!
Yes!
Well, then!
This week's game is...
"AMATOU"!
"YOU ARE KING OF KINK"!
Yeah!
YOU ARE KING OF KINK
Mr. Takada!
Yes?
I feel like you're doing it a little differently.
Hey you, shut up and do it!
Hey you!
But as usual, we'll have you fight hard and make it clear.
Yes!
Now, let me explain the rules.
Yes.
Today, it's a battle of who attacks and who gets attacked.
Yes!
But at that time, the attacked party cannot use any of these designated words.
Yes.
For example, if you use "hagataben"...
If you use it other than "hagataben"...
In that case, will you deduct points?
I see!
In that case, when you stand up...
Did you kick me?
What?
You didn't kick me, did you?
Because you're working during the show.
Yes, yes, yes.
How can you kick me?
Yes, yes, yes.
Right?
That's weird.
It's weird, isn't it?
It can't be like that.
It's an important place right now.
No, it's not like that.
That's why! There are both ways!
Come!
What? Damn it!
D-did you get it?
Don't be stupid!
How can you say that?
It can't be like that, right?
It's a live show!
Are you doing it for eight years in a row?
Shut up!
This guy...
He's always like this.
He's definitely an old man.
Thank goodness.
Is it okay?
Yes, yes.
So don't say anything other than what you've been told.
Okay!
It's okay to say it now, right?
Okay!
Then...
Let's say what you've been told.
Yes!
Kuwagatamushi-san, here you go!
Respect.
Yes.
Nice to meet you! Kabutomushi-san, here you go!
Women's language.
You've been doing it for ten years.
Once you say men's language...
It'll get worse and worse.
Do you understand?
Good, right?
Now, we'll switch in 30 seconds.
First, Kuwagatamushi-san, please say something.
Yes, yes!
What is it?
Here is your attack item. Mochi!
Wait, wait, wait! Let me take his back.
Oh, his back is attacking.
But I'm kabutomushi!
It doesn't matter!
If I'm not here, I can't be kabutomushi!
No, you're basically a hippo!
No, no, no! Let me take it! Let me take it!
Because it's your back! After all, Mochi is your back!
I understand!
But I'm...
No, you're fair!
I'm fair judge!
Wait a minute! Let me take kabutomushi!
Kabutomushi... you... you!
Let me take your back!
Yes, yes!
Of course! I'm not like you!
What are you talking about?
Did you kick him?
No, I don't think I kicked him...
If you're going to kick him, kick him!
Are you going to do it again together?
I don't think I'll ever kick a woman again!
Let me take his back!
Let me take it!
It's okay! Let me take it!
Because it's your back!
I'll take his back, too!
What's your name?
I'm fair judge!
I believe in you!
Okay! Let me take it!
Okay! Kabutomushi, you, too!
What's wrong with you?!
It's cold!
What's wrong with you?!
It's cold!
What's wrong with you?!
Don't laugh at me!
You're mean!
What's wrong with you?!
Let me take it!
Okay!
Are you ready?!
You have 30 seconds!
30 seconds!
I'll say "back" when you change places!
Then you can switch places!
Here we go!
Ready...
Start!
Stop it!
Why?!
Stop it!
Why are you doing that?!
Stop it!
Let me go! Let me go! I didn't do anything!
Let me go! I didn't do anything wrong!
Stop it!
What did I say?! I... I...
What did I say?!
Koutei! Koutei!
Are you deaf?! Are you deaf?! Are you deaf?!
Let me go!
Are you crazy?!
You look like you don't know anything!
Let me go!
What?! Who are you?!
Who are you?!
Let me go!
You...
Now, let's judge!
This match...
Kawabata wins!
You're overdoing it!
I just stopped it!
Now, let's move on to the second round!
Now, in the second round...
Yes!
There's no mercy!
Look behind you!
There are a lot of items you can choose from like this!
So you can use whatever you like and attack!
There are a lot of things, so please take a look!
Um... what is this?
That's called a "chainsaw"!
Um... I'll give you a "cyber-gun"!
Um... wait a minute...
How do you use this?
As an attack item!
Huh?
As an attack item!
Now, let's move on!
Next, we have another word!
Kawabata-san's word is...
English!
I can't say anything but English!
Next, Kabuto-mushi-san's word is...
Tokyo dialect!
I don't like it when you use it too much!
Now, since you lost earlier...
Um... Kabuto-mushi-san's word is...
And...
Are you stupid?!
No, Kabuto-mushi-san lost!
You won earlier!
You can attack from where you lost!
It's fair and square!
You lost earlier!
What do you mean "earlier"?
Are you having fun?
You said "earlier" without winning!
I said "earlier" without winning!
What are you doing?!
I'm scared!
You're so scared you won't say it!
I'm considering it as an adult!
Look at you!
You're ugly!
Since you lost earlier...
Please!
Now, let's move on!
Kabuto-mushi-san will always use Tokyo dialect!
Ready...
Start!
Wait a minute!
This is a big scene!
Wait a minute!
Stop it!
It's hot!
What are you doing?
Wait a minute!
Attack! Attack!
I know!
Change!
English! English!
Mixed juice!
Your face is out of frame!
Out of frame is not allowed!
System kitchen!
Change! Change!
Stop it!
Stop it! It's hot!
Wait a minute! Wait a minute!
Don't do that!
What are you doing?
Are you all right?
You're smoking!
It's hot!
Change! Change! Change!
Change!
It's English!
Miracle!
Stop it!
Now, let's decide!
This match is also a counter-strike match!
Now, it's a three-match match!
Now, in the three-match match...
...two new big items will be added!
Here!
From over there...
...an ice pool!
Over there...
...a netball pool!
In the three-match match...
...the points will be exchanged!
For now, it's 2-0!
What?
Mr. Kabuta...
...you're buying a lot of things...
OK...
...but in the end, you'll only have 3 points!
You're kidding!
Now...
...this may be a counter-strike match for Mr. Kyogata!
What are you doing?
If you're going to put it out now...
...use it!
I'm telling you!
That's also free!
What are you doing?!
I brought it over here so it's easy to use!
Is there any merit in hiding it?
Now, then...
...we still don't know the words, so let's take a look!
Mr. Kyogata is...
...a volleyball player!
No, you know...
...he's good at it!
You!
It's "go-hichi-go"!
Now, then...
...Mr. Kabuta is...
...an animal!
"Animal"?
"Animal"!
Now, then...
...just like before...
Wait a minute!
Let me do this!
He's always like this!
Hey!
Then let me do it!
But in the end...
...what are you doing?!
It's a wild card.
What is it?
Look at it! Try putting it in!
I'll forgive you for that.
What are you doing?!
What do you think you're doing?!
How many attack items are you going to use?!
What's with you?!
Give me the last three points, you know?!
On the contrary, let me say it first...
But that's how strong you are, Kabuto-san!
No, I don't think it matters...
Hey, you know...
Hey!
You know, we're tired, too!
We've been beaten up by you!
If you say it like that, we're tired, too!
But we're not going to let you swing it!
Huh?! Are you a chicken or a pig?!
Huh?!
Okay, let's continue!
Mr. Kuwagata is going to attack!
Kabuto-san, please do it in animal language!
Let's do it!
Ready...
Go!
What is it? What is it?
What is it?
Hurry up and show me! Hurry up and show me!
It's not funny! It's not funny! It's not funny!
Move away! Move away!
Wait a minute! Wait a minute!
Hurry up and show me! Hurry up and show me!
My heart's been hurting for a while now!
This is enough!
Move away! Move away! Move away!
Hurry up and show me! Hurry up and show me!
My home is so hot and so cold, that's shocking!
Move away! Move away!
It's cold. It's so cold!
It's cold! It's cold!
Rebound! Rebound! Rebound!
Kabutobushi-san, attack!
It's cold! It's cold!
Hurry up and take it! Take it!
I... I... I don't know what I'm thinking right now...
Hurry up and take it!
The game is...
It's over!
Let's go to the verdict!
The verdict is...
This game is also won by Kabutomushi-san!
It's so hot. Yuko, turn up the air conditioner and lower the temperature.
It's so hot. I can't do anything.
It's so hot.
It's the president!
Oh, it's too late.
Choshu... Richie?
What are you talking about? It's too late.
It's the president!
So what?
I'm going to kick your ass!
What are you talking about?
I'm going to kick your ass!
Wow!
Richie, why?
Why did you hit me instead of him?
You shouldn't hit an amateur.
Why?
But your punch was effective.
As expected of Spark Sasai, who was in first place in Japan's light class.
What are you talking about?
You shouldn't hit an amateur.
But I can't stand it anymore!
No, no, no. I've had enough of you.
But I can't stand his face.
But I don't know if I can stand it anymore.
Well, sit down.
Sit down!
Well, well, sit down.
Richie...
I'm pretty scared.
I know!
Mr. Amada, don't push it too far.
- Right? - What do you mean?
You keep saying "return it", "return it", "return it", "return it"...
You're the boss here, so I can say "no" even if you return it, right?
Your neighborhood reputation is getting worse.
What are you talking about?
People in your neighborhood are looking for you.
I see...
Do you know Mr. Mukai?
What do you mean, Mr. Mukai?
He's the first Japanese woman to travel to space.
Oh, Mr. Mukai! I know him!
- He's amazing. - That's right!
- I don't know if he's a man or woman... - That's right!
- He's a woman... - He's great!
- He's been through a lot. - Yes, yes...
- Of course, he's been through a lot of trials and training. - That's right!
- Even for a man like me, my head is down. - That's right!
- However... - Yes?
- He's ugly! - He's great! - He's amazing! - He's great!
- Get out of my way! - Do you have a debt?
I see.
I get it!
You have to carry me home many times.
- Yoku. - Yes?
- Give it to me. I'll give it back to you. - Thomas's coin.
Here you are, 10,000 yen.
I'm sure of it.
What are you doing?
What's this?
I told you to give me back 3 million yen!
I've never heard of it!
What's this?
Here you are, 3 million yen.
Hey, 3 million yen is 10,000 yen.
Here you are, 3 million yen.
What's this?
Here you are, 10,000 yen.
Really?
Here you are, 3 million yen.
What's this?
10,000 yen.
Really?
Here you are, 3 million yen.
Give me back!
What are you doing?
Boss...
Do you know what "love" is, Jaymac?
Oh, I see.
Don't shake it!
Don't shake it! Don't shake it!
That's enough!
W-what are you saying?
You're disgusting!
No, it's not like that.
I don't want it! I don't want it back!
You've completely angered me.
No, I didn't mean it like that.
I know you're angry now, but do you know what they used to say back in the day?
I wonder...
If you angered him...
He said you'd go into the bath with your wristwatch that wasn't waterproof.
What does that mean?
"Handcuff me." "Handcuff me."
What's up with you, Aida?
Huh?
Aida!
Huh?
What's up with you, Aida?
No, Hamada, it's Hamada.
Give me back my money!
Huh?
Give me back my money!
Huh?
Give me back my money!
Get out of the way!
What the hell is this?!
I don't want to die!
Aida!
Young people like you don't die!
Aida! I don't want to die!
Young people like you don't die!
Progression! Progression!
How nostalgic!
Aida!
What are you talking about?
You interrupted me, didn't you?
It's your fault.
I don't need you anymore.
You always say things I don't understand.
It's hot in here.
Can you turn off the heater?
But you turned it off earlier!
It's hot in here!
But you turned it off earlier!
Turn down the heat!
It's hot! It's hot!
Why?
Why did you turn it down earlier?
It's funny!
It's funny, isn't it?
If this doesn't go in, Hamada-nii-san will give me a bottle.
Is that so?
Ah!
But I'm sorry.
But it's bad to choose.
Which angle is better?
Whichever is fine.
It's pretty painful.
Whichever is fine.
I'll go like this, so your face will probably go like this.
No, this way.
It hurts!
Here I go!
What are you doing?
When I say "go", your face goes like this.
Here I go!
Thank you very much.
I'm going home.
President!
Is it okay if we start now?
Yes.
Then, I would like to explain our company's development department's new product.
- New product? - Yes.
- Is it okay? - Yes.
- Then, please. - Yes, of course.
- This is the product. - Pot!
Oh, it's a pot.
- It's a pot. - Pot.
This is our company's new product.
It's called "push-out-pot".
The feature is that you can easily get hot water with only half of the original pot.
- The original one? - That's right.
- It's the original pot, isn't it? - Of course it is.
- It's a pot that hasn't existed before. - That's right.
Also, the electricity bill is very cheap.
You can get hot water with only half of the original pot.
- That's good. - Of course, it's very hot.
I don't think you have it, but what do you think, president?
President?
That hurts.
It hurts.
It hurts!
What is it?
It hurts.
It hurts?
This is...
- It hurts? - It hurts.
It hurts.
- Let me try it. - Go ahead.
President!
Of course, it depends on how you use it.
- Then... - Go ahead.
President...
- Can you put your finger in here? - Yes.
It doesn't hurt.
- It doesn't hurt, right? - It hurts.
- It hurts.
- I'm sorry. - It hurts.
- Well, president. - Yes.
- Kurano. - Yes.
- Do it. - Yes.
- President. - Yes.
- Finger. - Yes.
- Put your finger in here. - Yes.
- I'll do it. - I'll do it.
- It hurts. - It hurts.
- Does it hurt? - It hurts.
- Does it hurt? - It hurts, but...
it's unpleasant.
- I'm sorry. - It doesn't hurt.
- I'm sorry. - But it hurts, right?
- It hurts. - But it doesn't hurt.
- It doesn't hurt. - It's because you pushed me.
- I'm sorry. - It's for you. - Yes.
- Do it. - Yes.
Well, then...
President, put your head here.
Here? Here, I put my head?
Yes.
It's like...
chestnut.
No, no, no.
This product...
Yes, it's a pot.
No!
Really?
No!
It took me three years, but...
You have to work hard.
Yes.
Because you're a salary thief.
I'm sorry.
Right?
Yes.
No!
Yes.
No!
Yes, it's a pot.
I know.
No!
Yes.
I'm sorry.
Everyone, get up!
I'm sorry!
I'm sorry.
That...
Right?
Yes, it's a pot.
Yes.
No!
Right?
Get up!
Yes!
President, like this!
Yes!
Can you do it?
I did it!
Run!
I can do it, too!
Let's do it together!
Excuse me!
I can do it, too!
I did it! Hurry up!
I can do it, too!
If you don't do it, you'll be in trouble!
I can do it, too!
Delicious rossero pomori inside!
Healthy and delicious Mexican!
Delicious rossero pomori inside!
Hot and delicious Mexican spice!
Delicious rossero pomori inside!
Beer, pori-pori, new popori!
Mexican spice age, new arrival!
Rossero, rossero, rossero, rossero!
With this in it, I'm handsome!
Emergency report!
Congress!
Yes!
Elections!
Secret party formation!
Mr. Amado.
Yes, yes.
It's kind of hot and painful, isn't it?
It's Ginza!
It's Ginza! It's a good place.
There's a shop there.
Ah, a shop.
A new hospital.
What is it?
It's a hospital.
Ginza's number one.
Yes.
Dr. Tokunaga.
Here he is.
He looks like Ashikawa's boss.
I'm glad you're not a thief yet.
Dr. Tokunaga's hospital.
Yes, at the clinic.
Entertainment world number one!
Who in the world is wearing this?
Who was the biggest in the past?
I don't like small things.
But I like this size.
Wow, are these earrings?
Are they earrings?
Aren't they trident earrings?
Aren't they insects?
Isn't it a good thing?
Aren't they insects?
No, they're really good.
So, this is what we've been doing.
So, this time, the most shining, nominated great entertainer of the entertainment world...
First of all, Mr. Osamu Sankon!
Sankon looks like he's going to make it!
I'd like to sing "Hanakusa no natta".
"Hanakusa no natta"? That's a great dad joke!
"Hanakusa no natta"? Is it a dad joke?
Next up is Mr. Jimmy Onis!
How about you, Mr. Kiyosugi?
Jimmy will definitely make it!
Really?
Really!
So, why is that?
Um... it's on his face!
That wasn't there in the beginning.
I see.
Let me introduce you to a woman!
She is Ms. Ruby Moreno!
Nice to meet you.
How about you, Ms. Kosouji?
I know you!
How sensitive can you be?
You laugh a lot, don't you?
Don't tell me you're stupid!
And last but not least...
Ms. Higoshi!
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you, too.
What a wonderful generation!
He's a natural born.
Oh, a natural born!
I'm the same age!
I'd like to ask you something.
Does it hurt?
What?
Sometimes it hurts.
What?
I'm a doctor!
I'm not a doctor, though.
It's okay.
I thought you said it hurt.
I'm not a doctor, either.
Take that!
Okay, let's move on.
Let's move on.
Yes, let's move on.
Let's go!
Yes!
Turn your head a little.
You don't like lemon, do you?
You're black, too.
Of course I am!
Doctor!
What are you going to do if you get lemon in your ear?
You're scary!
It hurts when you move!
What's wrong with you?
It feels good.
What?
It feels good.
It looks like lemon.
It does!
Try it.
It's dirty.
I can't show you.
I believe you.
It's been 80 years, hasn't it?
Yes, yes.
It's been 80 years!
80 years!
I haven't done it for 80 years.
It's good.
It feels good, doesn't it?
Doesn't it feel good?
Yes, it does.
It's okay!
It's moving over there!
What are you doing?
Come on!
Stop it!
What are you doing?
Hey!
It's moving!
Get up!
Ruby! Ruby!
Why are you getting up?
It's painful!
Ruby! Ruby!
Get up!
It hurts!
It feels good!
Why do I have a pair of tweezers?
They're different.
Why?
First of all, take out the metal thing inside.
That's...
First of all, take out the metal thing inside.
You know what you're saying, don't you?
It hurts!
What's wrong with you?
It's stuck.
Now, let's take a look at each pair of tweezers.
We've enlarged each pair of tweezers.
We've enlarged them.
First of all, there are three of them.
There are three of them.
That's...
It's painful!
Why do I have a pair of tweezers?
Doctor, what's this?
Ear hair.
It hurts!
But it's about this much.
You said it was beautiful.
It's cute.
It's ear hair.
It's true.
It's dirty!
What's this, Jimmy?
There's a lot of it.
Right?
I bought these for reference.
You did, didn't you?
Anyway, it's Jimmy-chan, isn't it?
Congratulations, Jimmy and Orissan!
Who's number one?
Entertainment is number one.
Yes.
You're number one.
You're not happy about it.
I'm sorry, but I can't say anything.
Hey, hey, hey.
How do you feel facing the camera?
I don't feel anything.
I just feel like I've done a good job.
You've done a good job.
Is that so?
Anyway...
That's it for the first episode of "Emergency Plan"!
Entertainment is number one!
If you put this in...
If you say it...
I'll kiss you with my mouth.
What are you saying, Jimmy?!
Why?!
You're crazy!
If you say it...
I'll kiss you with my mouth!
That's...
If you put it in...
If you don't put it in...
That "you" will turn into "Sato-san".
I won't go in!
That's right! That's right!
I won't go in!
You won't go in?
I won't go in!
You won't go in?
I won't go in!
Go in!
Why?!
Because you said it!
Even if you say it now!
It's fun!
Let's do it again in a promotional video!
Close your eyes!
A short one!
Wait a minute!
If you do it like this, you'll turn blue!
You'll turn blue!
Just do it normally!
That's a nasty face!
Just do it normally!
Your face is ugly from the side!
Your lips are red!
Why?!
Thank you very much!
I feel strange...
I feel like I'm going to have a seizure!
Watch it! Watch it! Watch it! Watch it!
If this doesn't go in, I'm going to die!
What are you doing?
It's not funny at all!
It's not funny at all in Hong Kong!
Bye now, you guys!
Without asking for anything
The youth of the street corner
Has to disappear now
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know
I've grown up fighting
I love you, I miss you, my heart is strong
I want to feel you
Towards you
I won't ask for anything
A famous train.
Brought to you by Lotte.