AISubs v3.4
Ladies and Gentlemen...
No, no.
Today's audience is young, too.
Young, young, young.
The song is not that exciting.
It's not that exciting at first.
Oh, you just said that it's not that exciting.
You suddenly started talking about the audience.
I didn't say that.
You're really not good.
When you say "wow", you often say bad things about the audience.
When we finish shooting, the audience often wave their hands at us.
But now that we closed the window, they think we're ugly.
I really don't think so.
I don't think there are any ugly people in the world.
They just have different shapes.
They all have different shapes.
Oh, you think like that.
Of course.
You've never said that before?
No, I haven't.
That means you've never thought about it.
What do you want people to think of you?
I want people to think of me stylish.
Not stylish.
What is it that you often say?
I hate it when you say things like that.
I hate it when you say things like this.
I hate it when you say things like 'juju'.
I'm curious about it.
Stop it.
This is a hard one.
When you said "ugly", you said about five of them.
No, you said four of them.
Anyway, you said "juju" when you were watching the movie "End".
Wow, you're looking at me.
No, it's not like that!
Finally, you said "juju" when I said "ugly".
Thank you!
I'm curious about four of them.
What are you afraid of?
What's wrong?
I'm not afraid of anything.
This is bad.
This is like a catacomb.
I'm scared of this.
If you wear a tie like this, you won't have a headache.
What's that?
Catacomb.
You'll die.
If you wear a tie like this, you won't have a headache.
I really don't want to wear a tie.
I want to wear it all the time.
I'm serious.
If you say "no" like this, I want you to pay attention.
I'm already 54 years old.
Let's quit it.
What do you want to quit?
I want to be spoiled.
I'm also 54 years old.
Maybe it's because I've been training.
Oh, you said it.
No.
You finally said it.
No.
I think it's because of my age.
The more muscle I have, the lower my neck is.
Is that so?
My neck is a little crooked.
It's below my neck.
It's not inconvenient.
Do you want to see it?
No, I don't want to see it.
No, I want to see it.
54-year-old man's neck. Who wants to see it?
It's really like that.
I know it's below my neck.
That's too much.
It's not here.
I'm sticking my neck out right now.
I'm serious.
No, you can't see it.
This is a lie.
I was riding an elevator with my wife the other day.
In a T-shirt.
Elevators have lights from above, don't they?
My wife suddenly pinched me on my nipple.
I thought it was a ball of hair.
I see.
I was surprised. My wife pinched me on my nipple in the elevator.
"Oh, I'm sorry!" I said.
"What are you talking about?" I said.
My daughter was a big hit.
Well, I guess you're right.
It's impossible for it to be here!
Then you're absolutely right!
No, no, no, it's not right.
You're saying too much. It's around here.
It's around here, isn't it?
Really, really. Where's your nipple?
Here.
I'm serious.
It's really here.
What?!
Wait a minute. I'm serious.
Look at this.
Look.
Isn't it too low?
It's too low, isn't it?
I'm serious. It's too low.
So my wife...
I thought it was a ball of hair.
I was about to take it off. "Oh, I'm sorry!" I said.
"Take it off!" I said.
My daughter was a big hit.
Shut up!
Why do you say it twice?!
Well, you're right.
Age... I don't want to say it too much, but...
I could see some white down there.
Oh, your nipples?
Yes, my nipples!
You can see it down there, can't you?
At first, I didn't care about it.
But I couldn't catch up with offense and defense.
You should have cheered for him.
No, no. It's better to cheer for him. He has a great aura.
No, you should have cheered for him.
I did, but I thought it was enough.
But, you know, it comes from below. It's not up there.
You mean "kintama"?
Yes, yes. Don't say "kintama"!
You're crazy.
It comes from below, doesn't it?
Oh, from below.
Yes, yes. But if you leave it alone, it's like "kitaouji kinyan".
I can't tell the difference.
I'm really sorry for "kitaouji kinyan".
It's like "kitaouji kinyan", isn't it?
Oh, yes, yes.
I see, I see.
It can't be helped.
From now on, I will...
Like "panel quiz 25",
I will...
I will control myself and catch up with offense and defense.
I know that, but...
It can't be helped.
Yes, yes.
I'm already 54 years old.
But if you leave it alone...
It's okay for you to talk.
I think you can speak louder than a normal person.
But how about your voice?
Can you sing old songs anymore?
No, it's still okay.
Yes, I can't speak well when I go to karaoke.
It's too high.
Karaoke... Ikeharonia...
You go to karaoke, don't you?
I don't go there that much, though.
How do you feel when you sing?
I can't do that.
Tell me about it.
What do you mean?
How do you feel when you sing?
When I become a musician...
Yes, yes.
I think my face is amazing.
Wait a minute.
Did you make fun of me?
What do you mean?
No, I didn't make fun of you.
What do you mean?
For example, what do you mean?
I'm a little embarrassed when I sing in front of you.
But don't you go in and out of the song a lot?
No, I'm not. Somehow, I'm getting over "Ahama da Bam Bam" too.
I think that's amazing.
But if you don't do it all, you'll feel embarrassed.
You'll say it.
You sing in front of everyone. You sing "Ashita ga Arusa" with us.
I'm really bad at it.
You sing one part of it yourself.
I'm really bad at "Ashita ga Arusa" and "Kohaku" too. I wanted to go home and I couldn't help it.
I wanted to go home with a bad habit.
Then, "NHK" has an interview. Do you know about it?
"NHK" is called for an interview.
Then, the NHK staff said, "Congratulations on your first appearance in NHK."
"Thank you" in Chinese.
Congratulations?
Is it okay for me to get angry and go home?
Why?
I thought about it when I got home.
Then, I looked at him and said, "Yes, thank you."
It's amazing how excited you were at that time.
That's amazing. You like it, don't you?
I like it.
If you can do it this year, I hope you can go there.
Really?
If you can do it this year, I hope you can go to "Kohaku".
No, no, no.
I'll take a break.
You don't have any songs, so you can't go.
Yes, I'm worried about old songs.
Then, I'll sing you a birthday song.
It was broadcasted on "Matsumoto Birthday Project" the other day.
We met when we were six years old.
When I realized it, I was already 54 years old.
A human and a dog come together and sing, sing.
What's that?
What do you mean?
That...
Did you make it?
No, I didn't. The staff and I thought about it and said, "Isn't this good enough?"
I said, "No, I don't like it when humans and dogs come together."
Please include that!
Humans and dogs don't go together.
Why not? Go!
No, no, it's fine.
I think dogs and humans are bad.
That's right.
But it's unnecessary.
Well, yes.
Dogs and humans always hurt somewhere.
What?
You guys are already 54 years old and you know that dogs and humans always hurt somewhere, right?
Somewhere, well...
Right? Dogs and humans always hurt somewhere, right?
Oh, my wrist hurts.
My knee hurts.
I know that.
My knee hurts.
I know, I know.
My ankle hurts.
It always hurts somewhere.
I know, I know, I know.
I can't move my hip joints, so I can't talk like this.
I know, I know.
It will be fixed in the middle.
I'm sorry for talking only sad stories like this.
But it's true. It can't be helped.
It's hard, isn't it?
I have no choice but to do it.
By the way, there is another good story, right?
What good story?
There is another good story.
Then, what is it?
That's too bad. What is it?
Then, what is it?
There is another good story, right?
"What is it?" "There is another good story, right?"
Then, what is it?
Tell me! What is it?
"Don't do it on your own!" "I don't know."
"Do you remember the last one?" "What are you doing?"
"Do you remember the last one?" "What? What? What?"
Well, this is...
"The staff is really working hard." "I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm scared."
What is it?
"Well, Ms. Hamada..." "Yes?"
She really wants to do a commercial right now.
I didn't do it! I didn't want to do it!
No! No! No! No!
Men's plums are rejected!
Men's plums came in.
Yes! Because Hamada's face looks like men's plums...
No, Hamada can only imitate men's plums.
He can do it, right?
Then, I asked for an offer.
Are you stupid?!
He asked for an opposite offer of co-starring with men's plums...
If you give us your opinion, we'd be happy.
Thank you very much.
It's rejected!
Mr. Nordl has rejected it!
It's not coming. It's not coming.
Well, it can't be helped. It can't be helped.
Well, he's an original men's plums talent.
Well, it can't be helped. It can't be helped.
Well, it doesn't matter.
No, no, it doesn't matter. It's really...
But, you know, finally, the image of men's plums...
It's almost gone.
There are still lovers, but that atmosphere...
"No, it's not like that." "What is this? Seriously, stop it."
"Last time, it was about a man's fate." "Yes, yes, yes."
"But in the end, it didn't work out." "No, no, it was rejected."
"Yes, it was rejected." "That's why it's fine." "Why is that?"
"By the way, I have good news for you this time." "No, it's not good news."
No, it's not 'oh'.
Do you remember the candy contest?
"Candy. Everyone bought their favorite candy." "Yes, yes, yes. We did it the other day."
"At that time, you were pushing it strangely hot." "Yes, yes."
"You've liked candy for a long time, haven't you?" "Asparagus?" "Yes, that's right."
Yes, yes, yes. It's still there now, isn't it?
"That's how much you like it, isn't it?" "No, no, well, that candy is..."
Ah, yes! A project to carry your favorite candy!
"That's why you like it so much, don't you?" "Try it! Try it! It's really good!"
"This is..." "Yes!" "Asparagus, which Hamada introduced as his favorite candy!"
"The company that sells it is..." "Yes, yes, yes."
"If you say 'Gimbis'..." "Yes, yes, yes." "Over there..." "Yes."
"Would you like me to contact you?" "Again?"
What are you doing?!
You like asparagus and you love it, don't you?
You've been eating it for decades, haven't you?
"And it seems like you've been watching me eat it." "Ah, is that so?" "Yes."
"So..." "That's not really..." "Yes." "Is it okay?" "Do you have to say such a thing?"
Your face is getting swollen.
Is that so?
"Is there a way of gaining weight like that?" "You're bad! You're too loose!"
Since you appeared in the Asparagus commercial, we've had a lot of inquiries about you.
That's weird!
You're saying "since"!
It's not what I want!
That's fine! That's fine!
It's what you want, or rather, it's what everyone wants.
First of all, thank you for visiting us in Asparagus.
We would like to thank you for suggesting the production of Asparagus commercial, which you appeared in.
It is a very grateful story.
Unfortunately, we currently do not produce commercials for all products, not just Asparagus,
so we ask for your understanding.
Well, I can't use it anymore.
He's refusing it completely!
He's refusing it with sentences!
First of all, you felt like you didn't like it, didn't you?
Like what?
You felt like you didn't like it, didn't you?
There's a countermeasure for that.
We will send you Asparagus, so please eat it.
I'll buy it!
No, no, no.
No, no, don't send it! I'll buy it!
I sent it because you said it like that!
No, but I...
I said it because you said it like that!
No, I said it because you said you wanted an asparagus!
Of course you wanted a commercial, right?!
No, it's not like that!
I haven't done a commercial yet, so I'll reject it a little, but...
Um...
Instead of that, why did you send me an asparagus?
No, no, no. Thank you very much.
Oh, and I hope you'll be able to deceive me well.
It says "sweets with asparagus only".
I don't think it's funny at all.
Not at all.
As a human being, it's not funny at all.
Well, well, well. It's not funny, right?
It's not funny for you, right?
As a human being.
I'm not saying it's not funny because it hasn't been decided yet.
For now, it's not funny.
But in this world, if there's a bad story, there's also a good story.
What are you doing?!
What...
But in this world, if there's a bad story, there's also a good story.
What are you doing?!
If there's a bad story, there's also a good story, right?
Could you look at this for a moment?
Huh? At what?
Do you know this kind of play?
Yes, yes, yes.
I know, I know.
That's right, right?
It's often played around noon.
No, no, Haruna Ai is doing it now, so...
One of our staff members said,
Isn't Haruna Ai and Hamada-san kind of similar talents?
No, I don't know why I said that,
but that's what the staff members thought,
and it kind of looks like it.
Does it look like it?
What they're aiming for.
What they're aiming for?!
Anyway, if it's like this, it should be fine, right?
Well, I don't know if it's similar to Haruna Ai or if it's different from Haruna Ai-chan, but...
Shouldn't a woman like this do it?
Why do you do a beauty salon commercial?
Haruna Ai is an old man.
An old man?!
Then you should do it, too!
You're an old man!
You're the type of person who should do it, too.
Thank you for coming to our commercial this time, Hamada-san.
This is weird!
That's how it's transmitted!
But it's actually from the general manager of a public beauty salon.
Akihito Kujime-san.
That's how it's transmitted!
It's like I'm saying I want to do it!
It's not like you want to do it!
You should do it!
But still!
You should do it!
You'll remember my face!
When I was in trouble, I said that, and it was unexpectedly funny.
When I was at the location and a child said "wow", I said "wow" and it was definitely funny.
I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have done that.
We have reviewed "IN NIGHT STUFF" once!
I heard that Hamada-sama, who is currently starring as Haruna Ai-sama, is a similar talent.
We have reviewed "IN NIGHT STUFF" once to see if we can produce a new commercial for the Hamada- sama version!
As a result, we will not give you an official answer yet, but we are currently discussing it in a forward- thinking direction.
Even at the stage of being forward-thinking, you will refuse, right?
As soon as we have a conclusion, we will contact you.
There is no such thing as contacting me!
As soon as we have a conclusion, we will report the current situation.
There is no way for you to refuse.
No, it's not "yes", it's "no".
It's funny!
Okay, let's dance!
You haven't even decided!
What?
You haven't even decided!
It's really embarrassing!
You haven't even decided and you're already saying it!
Let's really not do that anymore.
Okay.
But if we do it like this, something will come up.
One of those things, I'm sure of it.
Right?
It won't come up.
You know, I thought it would be nice if we could improve our image a little.
Eh, is my image bad?
It's bad, of course.
Eh, why?
I'm already like a monster!
Eh, seriously?!
Eh, you're okay with it?!
No, I'm really fine with it.
What?!
No, I'm really fine with it!
Lately, I've been fine with it.
I saved a wounded pig and brought it back.
Really.
In any case, taking a wounded animal home and bringing it back is a big deal.
In most cases.
No, but for the staff, you probably have a worse image of it.
That's definitely not the case.
You always come in in such a bad mood.
No, really.
You look like you're about to kill someone.
When you come in...
I have a really serious face.
Really.
Huh?!
I have a really serious face.
Basically...
How do you come in?
No, you...
Huh?!
Oh, good morning!
I wonder if the security guard will come in.
Oh, good morning! Good morning!
You come in wearing glasses, right?
That's scary too.
You shouldn't wear glasses.
They're glasses.
The colored ones, right?
The colored ones...
Once you made me leave it here in the bathroom.
I didn't know and I faced you and you left it here.
I was surprised.
I was scared!
Don't forget this place!
I don't know if it's good or not.
If we just walk and go to the security guard, we won't die.
"Kangaku Hakase 24-jin" that you must not laugh at!
DVD and Blu-ray will be released on November 29th!
However, right now...
Tomorrow night, we'll talk about a little weird old man and woman's "wow"!
Matsumoto will also...
This is the most shocking thing I've ever seen!