AISubs v3.4
11 hours of detective work.
5 people who have been working since morning have good news.
What is it?
You guys must be tired, right?
Yes.
Is it over?
We have to take a break.
No, seriously!
We have to take a break.
Shall we go and see some good stuff?
Shall you follow me?
Good stuff?
Shall we go and see some good stuff?
It must be really good stuff.
I don't know what you're talking about.
I'm tired of laughing.
We're going in from here.
This way.
What?
What is this?
It's getting bigger and bigger.
What?
Why is it so big?
It's getting bigger and bigger.
What?
What is this?
Is it going to collapse?
Is that what it is?
Does it mean that someone is going to collapse?
What?
It's crazy.
This is the first time.
Right?
It's amazing.
It's new.
Who's going to do it?
This...
Who's going to do it?
It's so weird.
It's crazy.
What is it?
What do you mean, it's been a year!
No, Mr. Matsumoto!
It's been a year in a blink of an eye!
That's right.
No, no, let's not talk about it.
How old were you?
I was...
young.
Your voice is so small, Mr. Matsumoto.
Next year...
I'll take a bath...
Take a bath...
Eat...
I'll do the laundry.
Yes.
Now, let's go!
This is nothing to me.
Wait a minute!
I'm dying! I'm dying!
This is nothing to me.
Ouch! Ouch!
Ouch!
What's "living"?
Seriously!
Tonight's guest, please come in!
Wow!
Mr. Matsumoto!
This is amazing!
What's going on?
Ouch!
Mr. Matsumoto's not in a bad shape at all.
Today, we have some gorgeous guests.
Then, let's get started!
First of all...
"Star" Nozomi!
Wow!
He doesn't talk at all.
Right, Mr. Matsumoto?
Jinnai!
Yes!
I don't talk at all.
Mr. Matsumoto, out!
I don't talk at all.
Mr. Matsumoto doesn't talk at all.
Well, it's not from now on.
Second place!
It has changed!
I won't kill even a fly!
Second place is...
The demon-winning "Desperate School Festival" devil dash!
Third place is...
Jinnai!
"Mysterious Okan's prescription"!
Well, let's go!
Fourth place is Jinnai!
Jinnai!
You've been busy lately.
You had insomnia.
When you whispered on Twitter,
your mother, who was worried about you, gave you medicine.
But that medicine was...
an appetite suppressant!
You've been having a hard time lately, too.
Unfortunately, it's time!
No, no, let me talk!
Mr. Hamada, let me talk!
It's only just begun!
Mr. Hamada!
Mr. Jinnai!
You're so excited!
Why does Jinnai...
have a wife...
but his mother...
can't...
manage his health?
Mr. Matsumoto!
No, Mr. Matsumoto!
I got divorced!
You know that, right?!
It's tough!
This is tough!
How many times are you going to say that?!
I'm... I'm sorry...
I'm sorry...
By the way, Animal-san...
Animal-san!
You know, my health method is...
Collaboration of clothes and laughter...
Until 200 years old!
Really?
First of all...
Recently...
This is what I invented...
Here we go...
Are you serious?!
I'm...
I'm sorry...
Let's continue!
Endo! Anoka! Janto!
What kind of punk is that?
Even their faces...
They're a little angry...
The next segment is...
Let me hear it, let me say it!
First of all, this person!
Let me hear it from your right ear!
To whom?!
To Kikuchi and Ami!
What should you do to fall in love with Hamada- san?!
That's right...
I've been doing a lot of gay-opera...
And I've performed with Hamada-san more than 10 years...
But no matter how many times I perform with him, I get nervous...
But Ami-chan, you're really into him...
Even though you're such a young girl...
Do you have any tips?
Tips...
I get really nervous when I say it in front of Hamada-san...
But...
I've fallen in love with him!
The other day, when we were on the same show...
There were a lot of female talents...
And Hamada-san came up to me and said...
You don't have to come up in front of me!
He said that to me!
Don't mess with me!
I don't know what to say...
Let's move on to the next segment!
You'll be surprised!
"Star Evolution"!
Let's take a look at their clothes
4th place is "Jinnai"
The usual school uniform
The price is...
46,852 yen
It's like this
You usually wear glasses
You wear this a lot
Really?
The heart sneakers are cute, right?
I got this for my acquaintance
A limited edition sneaker
It's cute and fashionable
3rd place is "Damon Tucker"
The red horse holiday
The price is...
100,053 yen
It's...
You usually go to the gym
You wear this a lot
You wear these a lot
You don't wear this a lot
You don't have to wear it a lot
4th place is "Tatsuni"
The price is...
230,800 yen
Go! Go! Go!
The wall...
It's okay
Ouch
It's not bad
Now it's time for 1st place
1st place goes to
Yoko Natsuki
She goes wild until morning
How much is it?
It's priceless
Yoko Natsuki
She goes wild until morning
Isn't it funny?
It's not funny
She goes wild until morning
Isn't it funny?
She goes wild until morning
Isn't it funny?
It's crazy
It's funny
It's so cute.
It's time for us to say goodbye.
See you next week.
Thank you.
Bye-bye.
This program was brought to you by the following sponsors.
At 8 p.m., detectives worked for more than 12 hours.
You know, you know...
The newcomer participated in the report meeting of his predecessors.
Here it is.
Now, I'd like to start the report meeting of Garsu Probitary Investigation Agency.
Just in case, I'd like to confirm the contents of this meeting.
We infiltrate various sites...
...observe suspicious actions and statements of people...
...and report their actions.
Huh?
No way! Out!
He seems like a veteran.
Ouch!
Is it okay?
If you have any information, please let me know.
Yes.
Go ahead.
I'd like to clarify...
...about the program "Driver Go Go", which he cherishes...
...but...
Out!
That's all you say!
Ouch!
On that day, he was busy with talent and staff at the location.
Yes.
It was the first time for a female talent...
...to work with Hosei.
So, the director was worried...
...and asked him about Hosei's image.
Hosei was excited and asked him.
Then, she said...
You're stupid.
Hosei! Matsumoto! Out!
There you are.
Out!
Hosei was laughing at the time, but in his heart he was determined to get revenge during the break.
When Hosei returned to the break bus, the girl had eaten lunch.
Thinking it was now, Hosei sat quietly nearby and started farting in order not to know.
He took out all the gas in his body without making a sound.
Hosei said, "This girl is now eating my fart with her lunch box."
Then Hosei...
Revenge and revenge became one.
Revenge and Hosei became one, right?
May I?
I'm Hamada.
Recently, the weather has been getting worse.
When we went to Hokkaido for shooting, we were supposed to introduce some sweets.
But when we went there for shooting, there was a good ramen shop and we wanted to go there.
So we changed the content of the shooting.
There are two things I remember.
They told me to look for it in a ramen shop called "Orange" in Otaru.
But nowadays, you can look for it online.
But you can't find it.
I asked people in my hometown and they told me to look for it in a ramen shop called "Mikan" in Otaru.
Hamada-san, please.
It hurts.
It's terrible.
I heard a terrible story.
Hamada-san called his junior.
He called Iwahashi-san of "Plus Minus".
He already called him.
Hamada-san left a message.
He misunderstood it as his own message.
Iwahashi-san asked him about it.
It's a new message.
Hello, it's Hamada.
How about next Thursday?
Would you like to eat something?
Next Thursday.
How about it?
Hey!
Are you listening to me?!
Are you kidding me?!
It's a mess.
It hurts!
It's terrible.
Yuko.
It's about Hamada's childhood.
First of all, he fell down the stairs of his house
in the middle of the week.
He fell down the stairs of his house?
He should be used to it.
He should be able to sit and climb even if he closes his eyes.
It hurts!
Just the other day, after the shoot,
I was wondering what Hamada-san was doing.
He was looking for a pin microphone that he took off a while ago.
Endo! Endo! Back! Out!
It hurts!
This is about Endo.
It's about Endo.
He was introduced to Ginzan when he was young.
And when a director called a talent in,
they would say catchphrases or things like that.
And after thinking about it,
in front of Katsura Bunchin-san,
Katsura Bunchin-san, who has recently gained strength...
It's Katsura-san!
It's easy!
And when a director called you, you would say "what are you?"
It's a good story.
It's about Kiyoshi.
Kiyoshi?
The Tokyo 1st.
Yes, he was doing a show in Tokyo 1st.
Wait a minute!
What are you doing?
I'm scared, so I'll fight you all at once.
It hurts!
I'm sorry for saying hello.
Let's calm down for now.
He was doing a show in Tokyo 1st.
And I was there too.
And we would go from Nagoya Station to the set in a show bus.
And we would always get on the show bus and say "shall we have a meeting?"
And we would say "shall we have a meeting?"
And we would say "shall we get on the show bus and do it?"
And we would get on the show bus and do it.
Matsumoto, Enryo, Kanata, Kiyoshi, Kanto...
And we would meet up in the local area.
You have feelings for it.
It's early in the morning.
I have something to say about Kiyoshi.
I did a solo show the other day.
And I invited Kiyoshi as a guest.
And he came.
And we made about 3 new jokes during the show.
And about 2 hours before the show, Nobu and I were in the dressing room.
And we were standing in front of the mirror.
And he came in.
And he looked at us and said...
Are you practicing your lines?
This is the most important moment.
And then he came in and started talking.
Oh, you're going to sit down?
This is the most important moment.
And I thought the person who understood it the most sat down.
And I told Yasushi not to do it at least 20 times.
Let me do it.
This is the most important moment.
Oh, it hurts.
And...
I'm sorry about this morning.
And...
I didn't know what to do.
But 20 minutes before the show started...
I was like...
Stop it!
And Nobu and I said...
Shall we go eat ramen?
That's crazy.
You can't go eat ramen 20 minutes before your show, right?
And I said...
We don't like ramen.
And he said...
I see. If you're alone, you can go eat soba.
And he said...
I see. If you're alone, you can go eat soba.
And it was 5 minutes before the show started.
So we went back to the lobby and said "please."
And he said...
Please.
And he was eating a tempura bowl.
Tempura bowl, tempura bowl.
We said...
"Let's go eat okonomiyaki tonight," and we went...
"This time, I want to eat something unique," and he said...
Can we have some kimchi on top?
And they had kimchi on the strings.
So the show got canceled and I went out and dodged it.
(He's still eating it)
You can't eat it like this
(He's still eating it)
I don't like it
But you can eat it
You can do it!
Have you heard of "taboo" on stage?
Kiyoshi was the judge of Osaka's comedy contest.
And while he was doing the story, he stood up and said "it's funny!"
No, while he was doing it.
Yes, I've been told about it.
There's a theater called "Okinawa Kagetsu".
We went there and Kiyoshi was doing it.
And we were doing the manzai.
And in the middle of it, there was this manzai artist, Yokoyama Yasushi, who was doing it.
And he said to Paradise, "tell me about your big taboo!"
And Paradise said, "I want to become the world's best manzai artist and become rich!"
And the next manzai artist who was there was wearing these sleeves and said "yo-yo-ta!"
And he said "yo-yo-ta!"
I can't! I can't do it!
Ouch!
My hands are burning!
In the past, Kiyoshi was the judge of a comedy show.
And as soon as he said "take it away", the stage went down.
And we were there at the same time.
And as we passed each other, we said "take it away!"
Take it away!
Don't yell!
Don't shout!
And we took the scene.
I won't be surprised!
Go! Go!
That's amazing!
What's wrong, Yoshiba?
Oh? Can we talk for a while with you, Sakata?
Oh, come on!
Let's talk in private!
No, why would we talk in private?
- Let's go to the drama club. - I know what you're talking about.
- Yeah. - Go ask for me in the drama club.
- A funeral? - A funeral?
- Out! - What's with the funeral?
- Ouch! - Ouch, ouch, ouch!
- Are you okay?
- No, I'm at Toshio Sagata's house, and we're playing pranks on him.
- Yeah. - And when I get home...
- Yeah. - My mom and dad are always sleeping together.
- Yeah. - And my dad wakes up and says...
- Yeah. - "Mom, I don't know what it is, but..."
- Yeah. - "Um..."
- Yeah. - "It's a shallow broadcast, but..."
- Yeah. - "Tomorrow, Toshio Sagata will come out."
- Yeah. - "I'm sorry about the mic test,"
- Yeah. - "but I'll do it from 11 o'clock to 12 o'clock."
- Yeah. - "I'm sorry about that," but...
Do you have two pots and lids?
"I'm sorry about that," but "two pots and lids?"
"I'm sorry about the mic test," but "do you have two pots and lids?"
Do you have two pots and lids?
My dad put down the phone
and hit the pot with the lid in front of it.
My mom said, "Dad, what happened?"
Dad! Dad!
Something's wrong!
- Nishikado. - Yes?
I'm tired of talking, but it's not heavy at all!
Hey! Hey!
It's not heavy at all!
- Huh? - It's not heavy at all!
- He's a bad guy! - He's a bad guy!
- Ah! - Ah!
- He's not that bad! - He's a bad guy!
- Hey!
- Ah! - You guys!
At 9 p.m.,
a strange request is thrown at the new detectives.
Everyone okay?
It seems like a famous Inugami family is fighting over their inheritance.
My relatives are gathering now, and they want me to come in between, so shall we go?
It seems like a famous Inugami family is fighting over their inheritance.
I'll go.
Excuse me.
Huh?
I'm from the detectives' office. Is it okay if I come in here?
Yes, yes. Thank you very much.
- Please come in. - Please come in and have a seat, sir.
Excuse me.
Mr. lawyer, can you read the will as soon as possible?
Mrs. Takeko, please wait a moment.
Mr. Sae Seizen said that the will should be read by all members of the Inugami family.
What did you say, Mr. Takeko?
I'm sorry, everyone. I think my son will be here soon.
Come on, sit down here.
Now, lawyer, please begin.
Before that, I have a request for Mrs. Matsuko.
What is it?
Is it really your son's...
...itao?
What did you say?
Well, I'm not doubting it or anything like that, but...
...would you mind letting me see your face for a moment?
So you're saying...
...this itao...
...is a fake?
No, that's not what I meant, but...
That's troublesome.
Could you let me see your face for a moment?
If you say it like that...
...this itao...
...will let you see my face for a moment.
That's nice of you.
(Laughter)
(Applause)
I won't do it.
(Laughter)
Get a board and a towel and do it.
(Laughter)
Thank you.
(Laughter)
I don't need it.
(Laughter)
I don't need it.
You're kidding me.
Ouch!
We don't know if your Itao is real or not, do we, Mumeko-san?
No.
Itao is a really troubled man.
Oh, my goodness!
Detectives over there!
What's with that face?
Are you saying this isn't Itao?
We don't know if it's really Itao or not!
Oh, my goodness!
Itao!
Don't keep quiet and say something!
Itao!
(Laughter)
Ouch!
Everyone!
I'm Itao!
Tanaka!
You'll understand, won't you?
Matsumoto!
Tanaka!
Out!
Ouch!
Endo!
Do you feel the same way I do?
(Laughter)
It hurts!
Haman!
(Laughter)
Matsumoto, Kanada, Kanata, Hamoto!
(Laughter)
It hurts!
Haman...
(Laughter)
Do you believe me?
Haman...
(Laughter)
Do you feel the same way I do?
(Laughter)
It hurts!
Hendo, Kanata, Hamoto!
(Laughter)
It hurts!
(Laughter)
Matsumoto!
(Laughter)
Kanata, Matsumoto, Hamoto!
(Laughter)
It hurts!
(Laughter)
Matsumoto...
(Laughter)
Matsumoto...
(Laughter)
Do you feel the same way I do?
(Laughter)
Matsumoto, Kanata, Hendo, Kanata, Hamoto!
Do you feel the same way I do?
(Laughter)
It hurts!
Who are you?!
I didn't let you knock me down.
Ouch!
Ouch, ouch, ouch!
I didn't let you knock me down.
I'm done with you.
Since you're not the real Itao, is it okay?
You don't believe me at all, do you?
Itao, take that mask off and do it!
(Laughter)
Out!
(Laughter)
You're out. Ouch!
(Laughter)
You're out.
Let's go.
(Laughter)
I don't know what you're talking about.
Let's go, everyone.
You're pretty tough.
I'm looking forward to working with you.
The detective work is finally coming to an end.
But after this...
That man will cause a huge uproar with an unexpected development!
Ten o'clock in the afternoon...
When the five men who had been swung around by Itao return to the training room...
There is a change...
Hey, everyone!
Hamariza is gone!
It's true!
Hamariza has been stolen by Kaito X's third generation!
Kaito X is the third generation of Kaito X in this statue!
I've seen this face before.
It looks like...
Mago?
Yattaro?
It looks like Hamada-san.
Yeah, it does.
Emergency! Emergency!
Hamariza Meiga has been stolen by Kaito X's third generation!
Everyone in the agency, gather up for action!
Action, you say? Let's go, everyone!
Hamariza Meiga has been stolen by Kaito X's third generation!
Everyone, please sit over here.
It's a terrible atmosphere.
Has Hamariza been stolen?
It's still at the back.
Did you call for me?
It's still at the back.
It's always like this.
As you all know,
Meiga, also known as Jika Juuouken,
has been stolen by Hamariza!
In order to arrest the culprit as soon as possible,
we've asked the police department for cooperation.
Now, please.
The judge is... the prosecution... Shunzo!
The criminal is... thief... X.
I agree!
Hey! Bring it on!
The first... thief... X.
The criminal... looks like this face.
Do you understand?
Hey!
There is... a criminal... in this world!
Features... lips... corpse...
There is really no one who can call themselves that.
Be honest. Do you understand?
You stand up first.
No?
OK, you stand up.
OK, stand up!
OK, you stand up.
You stand up!
OK.
You're different, too.
I'm glad.
OK. Stand up!
You're different, too.
Where is the bag?
Is there a bag around your chin?
OK. Stand up!
Face straight!
You're different, too.
Take off your hat.
Raise your chin.
Hey! Take off your hat!
Wow!
You're different, too.
Can you stand up?
Can you stand next to that statue?
I don't want to stand up.
OK. Stand up!
You're different, too.
Hey! Stand up!
Matsumoto, Endo, Tanaka, Out!
That's right. He's usually like this.
Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!
You're different.
No matter how you look at me...
...it's you.
Well, if you say we look alike...
...well, maybe we do.
This year, it's you.
He said it clearly!
This year, it's you.
You have...
...a lot of flaws.
Damage and thorns.
Is there anyone who has flaws like this?
Violence has been shaken up.
Wow!
That's amazing!
Matsumoto, Endo, Tanaka, Out!
Ouch! Ouch!
You're different.
No matter how you look at me...
...we don't look alike.
This year, it's you.
Damage and thorns.
Ouch! Ouch!
Shut up!
Seriously! Seriously! Seriously!
Sing!
No, I can't.
Hey, come here!
No, no, I'm scared.
You're not scared! You were always laughing!
Hey, you! Who are you?!
What are you doing?!
I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
I won't let you go!
This year, it's your year!
Until we meet again!
We'll win!
I'm not kidding.
We're the same. We're just pulling.
I don't have a reason to lose.
Wait, wait, wait...
You're wrong!
Get out of the way!
You really are annoying.
Hey!
You! Come here!
Come here, you!
Don't say weird things. It's dangerous!
Be quiet!
Close your eyes!
I can't do that!
Look in the mirror!
- All right, all right - We're sorry, I'm sorry
No, no, we really didn't mean it
- Oh, God - Ouch, ouch
Hey, you're an illiterate lady, you don't understand a word!
- We got it - We got it
- You have an obligation - Really?
- Not yet. - I can't do it.
- Hold it.
I'll do it.
- Hosei. - Yes.
- Are you ready? - Yes.
- Let's do it. - Yes.
Don't run away.
I'll leave you alone.
- Countdown. - Scary.
Go!
Four!
- Scary, scary, scary. - Three!
Wait a minute!
That person is not the culprit who stole the hammer!
- Countdown. - Scary, scary, scary.
Five!
Four!
- Scary, scary, scary. - Three!
Wait a minute!
That person is not the culprit who stole the hammer!
Chief Inspector, you are making a terrible mistake!
Please let that person go!
Huh?
I didn't steal it!
I didn't steal it from the beginning.
- You stole it! - No, I didn't steal it.
- You stole it! - Which one?
- You stole it! - You stole it!
Chief Inspector, the first thief, X, was best at...
disguise!
No one has ever seen the first thief, X, before!
Yes! In short, this statue's face is not the first thief, X's face!
Where is it?
No, where is that hidden face?
Excuse me, can you bring me that?
Chief Inspector, please use this hammer to smash X's statue!
Smash it?!
- Yes! - Oh! A statue!
Yes!
All right, the final act!
What?!
I'm happy for you.
Wow!
You're back!
He's back!
- He's back! - He's back!
The dojo may still be fine!
He's back to his usual self, hasn't he?
If this is the true form of the first generation Phantom Thieves X...
...it means we know who that villain is!
The culprit who stole the hammer chair is...
...Tsukitei Hosei!
It's you!
It's you?!
No!
Thank you.
Huh?
It's you, isn't it?
What are you doing here?
Excuse me...
...but I don't know you.
This year...
...it's you.
Huh?!
Matsumoto, Hamada, Endo, Kanaka...
...Kuro!
- Wow! - Wow!
- That looks good! - I want one of those!
Damn it! Hamada is enough!
I know!
Hey...
...what is your name?
Tsukitei Hosei.
You are...
...third generation.
First generation is...
...what generation?!
Say it yourself.
First generation?
First generation.
What is your name?
Kaito X First Generation.
What are you saying, you bastard?!
Your name is...
...Yamazaki Hosei.
No!
It says "first generation X" on it!
Huh?!
Look at me closely.
From behind...
Show me properly, will you?
Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!
Come here.
Wait a minute. I had a little hope.
What? Don't push me!
What?
Please!
What?
Wait a minute. You're going to push me, right?
Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!
Masumoto, Kanada, Endo...
It's changed!
Ouch! Ouch!
Okay, stand up. Stand up yourself.
I know you're up to something.
Ouch! My armpit! My armpit! My armpit!
Why did you stop me?!
I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
It's not twice as bad!
I'm not doing this!
It's already too late, right?
It's not enough, you know?
Let's go!
Countdown.
Ready?
Five!
Four!
Three!
Two!
Aaaaaah!
Wait!
- Wait! - Wait!
- I'm scared! - I'm scared!
- I'm going down! - I'm going down!
Ouch!
- Let's go! - Sorry, I'm a little scared.
- How many seconds? - Three.
- Three and a half! - Three and a half!
- It's a long way. - Let's stand up straight!
- You're saying it twice. - Let's go!
- Three! - Two!
- One! - Ouch!
- Ouch!
- It hurt a lot! - It really did!
- K.O.! - K.O.!
- I'm so tired! - Hey!
Matsumoto, Hamada, Endo, Tanaka, out!
- Ouch! - Ouch!
- That's weird.
- Yama-chan was so happy about it, but...
- I feel sorry for her.
In the midst of a huge uproar and excitement, there are troublesome problems.
Everyone, we're in trouble!
What? Is that all you know?
It looks like a salaryman who was cheated by his senior detective is coming to beat us up.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Does that mean that a general public and a detective are fighting?
That's what it is.
My senior detective doesn't listen to me at all, so let's go together.
He's a senior detective I've never met before.
All right!
I don't need your jacket.
Oh, you don't need it anymore?
Yes.
Are you mad that you lost your jacket?
Are we going outside?
It's a separate room, so it's a little close, but it's a little far away.
Senior detective, what are you doing?
I don't know anymore.
A salaryman who lost his jacket is coming to beat us up.
Does that mean we're fighting?
We're fighting.
The bus carrying five people goes to a nearby detective office.
What will happen there?
Oh, I can hear you.
I can hear you outside.
We're fighting.
Wait a minute.
Don't stare at me like that.
Will you be friends with me?
Don't do that!
Get out of here!
Hurry up and sit down!
Is it okay if we don't interview you?
What are you going to do?
Will you leave me alone?
Okay, you guys.
If you're so lucky, let's see who's stronger.
Get out of here!
An age-appropriate entertainers'
Karada-hari-matsuri
begins now.
If you keep talking,
we'll kick you out of here.
What?
What are you doing?
Let's call it...
Koshoba Match
What?
I don't know what you're talking about.
"Koshoba Match" begins now!
Get out of here!
If you can't do it in 30 seconds,
we'll make you talk.
Okay!
What are you doing?
Ready...
Start!
What's going on?
What's this?
What are you doing?
This is unsettling.
What's going on?
I haven't spoken yet.
What's going on?
What's this?
What's going on?
Everyone's out!
What's going on?
Ouch!
I'll make you pay for what you've done!
Come on, come on!
What's going on?
What's going on with you?
I'm going to make you pay for what you've done!
I'll make you pay for what you've done!
You were shouting, and you were completely out of it.
Ouch!
I did it! I did it! I did it!
I did it! I did it!
A pig and a turtle fight.
No one said anything!
Another fight in the first match.
This time, it's the Degawa Corps' Tanaka and Ueshima Corps' Iwao's fight.
Let's go!
Get ready!
This again?
Start!
(Speaking Japanese)
(Korean)
(Japanese)
(Laughter)
(Japanese)
(Cheering)
(Applause)
(Japanese)
I can do it!
Ouch! Ouch!
Ouch!
You little cheater!
Can you fight?
I can do it!
Are you ready?
Start!
Do you want to try it?
Soft-type.
This is a game!
Not a mobile game!
This is terrible!
I won't do it!
What are you doing?
Stop laughing!
I'm serious!
What the hell is going on?
Ouch!
My voice is coming out of my mouth!
You can't afford it, can you?
Ouch!
Was it the coldness of power?
Get up! Get up!
What the hell is going on?
I'll show you! I'll show you!
I'll show you!
Now, it's eye-covering kendo confrontation!
Eye-covering?
In a closed space, they eye-cover each other and fight while feeling each other's presence with their ears.
Yoshinobu, I'll show you!
Now, Kendo Yudansha Yoshinobu and Ueshiba Gundan Yasumura will challenge.
Now, turn around three times and start!
I see.
Now, turn around three times and start!
One!
Two!
Three!
Start!
Do it! Do it!
[laughter]
Kento sits on the platform and eats the hot ramen.
It's called "hydro-hopping ramen".
You can't imitate it.
Watch it!
[laughter]
Can you do it yourself?
Can you do it?
I'll show you a report like a normal gourmet show.
Are you a gourmet show comedian?
[applause]
[laughter]
[music]
[laughter]
[music]
[laughter]
[applause]
[laughter]
[applause]
Next, they prepared a maid's costume.
For some reason, they soak all of them in hot water and then cut them.
The challenger is Haranishi of the Mueshima Army.
It's too hot.
[laughter]
It's too hot.
[laughter]
I'll say it.
What do you mean?
You can't do it.
Don't make fun of me.
Let's do it.
Ready, set, go!
[airhorn]
You can't do it. You can't do it.
[applause]
[laughter]
What are you doing?
[laughter]
[shouting]
Look, look.
[shouting]
Stop doing that!
[shouting]
[laughter]
[shouting]
[Laughter]
Who did it?
[Laughter]
One man!
[Cheers]
[Drumroll]
Out!
(shouting)
- You guys went all out with the main dish, didn't you?
- It's time for bed, it's over now.
- It's over, right?
- We'll kick you with the usual hole.
- Prepare the hole!
(dramatic music)
(shouting)
(speaking foreign language)
(shouting)
- Ouch! - Ouch, ouch!
Since we have a first-time member, let's do it one more time!
What's going on here?!
Watch your hands!
But before you do that,
get some air out of your buttocks and put your hands on your buttocks!
Don't bend your head!
Matsumoto, Hamada, out!
Ouch!
Of course, I'm the invincible leader, Ueshiba!
You can't beat me with such a thing!
Come on, show yourself! You're scaring me!
Hey, don't mess with me! I'm already dead!
He's dead.
Come on, show yourself!
Hey, Ueshiba!
What?
Your butthole always has air in it because you have a forehead.
Don't say that!
It's too hard for you to say that you have a forehead and a butthole!
Don't say that!
Okay, I'll say it.
Anyway, I'll continue my work.
Hoshitan!
Yes?
Bring me some lotion and supplements.
Yes, sir.
I'll give you a massage.
Get in there!
I'm not scared of anything.
Yes, yes.
Ouch!
Apply this.
Ouch!
Apply this.
Ouch!
I'm scared, Fukuoka!
Hurry up and do it!
Wait a minute!
Yes, it's coming out.
No, no, it's not.
It's coming out.
Close it.
Why is it coming out?
It's coming out all of a sudden.
It won't stop. What is this?
Yamada, Tanaka, Endo, Kosei, out!
What are you doing?
It won't stop.
What is this?
What the hell are you doing? Don't make me ride it, man!
Don't make me ride it! I just got here!
Ryuichi, where are you going?
I just got here, bitch!
Ryuichi, it's easier for you to stay like this.
Ryuichi, it's easier for you to stay like this, bitch!
At 1:30 in the middle of the night, even after returning to the office, there are still trials.
I'm surprised!
What is it?
You talk a lot.
Is it your first show?
No, this is my first show.
Nice to meet you.
You guys are new detectives.
I took care of your comrades, Hiroshi.
Let me hear you talk.
I'm sorry, guys.
This is what happened.
But I'll give you guys a chance.
You guys will be locked up somewhere in this building.
First of all, Hanada and Tanaka.
You guys can go first.
By the way, you can laugh from there.
No, I don't want to.
If you laugh, you're out.
It's a little cold at the end of the day.
Put on your jacket and set off.
Don't forget to wear a jacket.
Hanada and Tanaka.
I don't like you guys.
If you hit me like this...
I'm sorry.
You have a strong nose.
Let's be careful.
Late at night.
A detective who should never be surprised.
First of all, the two of them head for Fujiwara's rescue.
But Tanaka's anxiety can't be relieved.
Let's take a picture.
I knew it.
Is it your elbow?
No, it's my elbow.
It's really scary.
If I'm about to scream, can you hug me?
No, no.
That's dangerous.
I'll be careful.
Can you hug me?
Okay, I'll hug you and walk away.
But you're bigger than me.
Yes, yes, yes.
If you're scared, can you hug me?
I won't let you go.
Can you really walk like this?
I don't think so.
Have a good day.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
If you're strong, I'll hug you.
He has a weak back.
Yes, yes.
There are many things.
See? See? See?
See? See?
You...
What should I do? I don't know.
I really didn't like it.
It took me too long.
It's dark.
Give me your elbow.
Just here.
I'm not laughing.
This is the scariest thing.
How can I go?
Do I have to go down the stairs?
I don't think so.
No!
Wait!
I'm already falling!
Wait!
One and eight hundred yen!
Wait for me!
I'm sorry.
Can you do something about this?
I'm sorry.
This is where you'll die.
Hey, Tanaka, what's wrong with you?
I don't want you to know.
I'm telling you, you have to pick it up.
I'm picking it up.
You scared me.
This way?
Wait a minute.
You scared me.
Anyway, thank you for your hard work.
Thank you.
We don't usually go to places like this.
But we'd like you to know something special.
I'm sorry to say this, but...
Even if the weather is bad...
I think the area where Santa Claus can be found is...
What?
Arakawaku.
Arakawaku!
Thank you for your hard work.
Thank you.
Thank you for your hard work.
I'm sorry.
You scared me.
I told you not to do it.
You scared me.
Can you stop doing this here?
Meanwhile...
The three people who remained in the room are quietly waiting for information.
He's writing something.
What is it?
You scared me.
What is it?
[Crying]
Open it.
Hurry up.
Mr. Amada open it.
[Screaming]
It says "never push".
Never push it?
Never push it.
Please, push it.
It's not good for you.
Don't drink it.
They continue their search for Fujiwara.
They aim for two different volumes.
Those stairs...
I see.
Do we do it now?
Yes.
This is...
I'm sorry!
What is it?
Dance!
What are you doing?
Dance!
We the key!
Do the teaser, the concert!
Dance!
We the key!
Do the teaser, the concert!
What is it?
Dance!
We the key!
What is it?
We!
Something is missing.
What is it?
It's painful, isn't it?
I was surprised.
Why did we have to do that scary thing?
It hurts!
We followed the instructions of the machine and made it do it.
Do you understand?
Yes.
I was surprised!
I saw it!
Why?
Can you breathe now?
Yes, yes!
- What are you doing? - You're not breathing!
- Are you done breathing? - Yes, yes!
- Did you breathe? - Yes, yes!
- You said "yes", didn't you? - Yes, I did.
- I'll breathe now! - Yes!
- Yes!
- What's wrong with you? - What's wrong with you?
- You said "yes", didn't you?
What's wrong with you?
As there were no passengers, they took pictures.
Three...
Two...
One!
- Pictures will come out of the side of the machine. - Oh, thank goodness!
- Please wait outside. - Oh, you scared me!
- I thought there was something there. - You're right.
- Oh, it's here! - It's already here.
- You scared me! - You scared me!
- I thought it was a similar talent. - Similar talent?
As they couldn't take pictures well, they moved to another place.
- It's here! - It's here!
- Yes, yes! - It's here!
- What is it? - What is it?
- Wow! - What is it?
- Wow! - Wow!
- Are they starting to move? - Well...
- What is it? - What is it?
It's hard.
- Kawada and Tanaka, you've had enough of us. - Yes.
You're the only one left. Are you going now?
Don't forget to wear an uwagi, you guys!
Don't forget it!
They're here.
Did you get caught, you two?
Before the rescue of Fujiwara, the three of them go looking for Hamada and Tanaka.
Ah, I'm scared.
I don't want to do it anymore.
Right? Right? Let's not do it anymore.
It hurts like hell.
It's like janga.
It's because Hamada-san was going like this.
At that time, the two of them are under arrest.
Help me!
What is this?
I can't hear anything.
That's right.
What is this?
What is it?
Turn on the lights!
I'm scared.
What is it?
I don't know what it is.
I'm scared.
What is it?
Ah, I see.
I'm scared.
What is it?
It touched me.
It's scary.
What's wrong?
It touched me.
What is it?
It's suffocating.
Wait here.
This is...
What?
You guys!
Wait!
Wow!
I'm Kyoko of Sexy Ranbou!
Also, I'm Mika!
Wow! You guys look so cool!
What is this?
Help me!
What? What?
This is...
What's wrong?
Something is hitting my face!
What's wrong? What's wrong?
Oh, it's gross!
What? What? Stop! Stop!
Oh, it's gross! Stop!
What? What?
What is this?
Something is hitting you!
It's hitting me!
Who is this?
I can't get used to this place!
That's right! I can't get used to this place!
That's enough!
I can't see anything!
That's enough!
What? What? What?
What's wrong? What's wrong?
It's dangerous!
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
That's enough!
That scared me!
Jiro-san!
That's dangerous!
Isn't that the voice of a karakami?
Soon, Hamada will...
This is a big position.
Mr. Hamada, here you are.
Thank you.
He's a manager.
Here you are.
Thank you.
Mr. Hamada...
This is the first time I've seen you like this.
I can't laugh like this.
This is the first time I've seen you like this.
I think this is it.
Hamada and Tanaka are here.
There he is!
What?
Help me!
Where's Mr. Hamada?
He was small back then.
There's a lot of Hamada here.
No, no, no!
Wait a minute!
Mr. Hamada!
Take it off.
I'm sorry!
I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
It hurts, it hurts, it hurts!
That's because...
Mr. Hamada and Mr. Tanaka have been together for a long time.
What?
You guys are weird.
Of course it's not me.
That's because you're always shining at night.
I don't know what you're talking about.
That's good, that's good!
Can you tell where we're going with that map?
The five of them head for the ground indicated by the last map.
Isn't this amazing?
Where are we going?
We're in a forest.
Will we be okay?
This is dangerous.
We have to be careful.
I know, right?
Yes, our feet.
Let's go slowly.
But my head hurts.
- Your head hurts? - Yeah.
What is this? I'm scared!
This cross...
It's long!
Why did we have to save Fujiwara-san?
Seriously?
- There he is! - Where?
Where?
It's you!
- It's you! You're caught! - I was there!
- Will you save me? - Yes, of course!
- We'll save you! - Hurry up! You'll get caught!
You don't have much time!
- Can't you do it yourself? - Yes, yes!
- I got it! I got it! - I'll become a titan's sacrifice!
- A titan's sacrifice? - What's that?
- You're completely blinded. - Thank you!
- Here, here, here! - What's wrong with you?
- What's wrong with you?
- Can you put this on me? - I can't put it on you!
- Can you put it on me? - I can't put it on you!
- Can you become a titan's sacrifice? - Everyone, hurry up and escape!
Run!
Go, go, go, go, go!
- Straighten up! No problematic! - Yeah, yeah, it's fine!
- Alright! - Ah, he's fast!
- He's fast! He's fast! - This is serious!
- What's going on? No, no!
- Aah! It's important! It's important! - No, it's fine!
- No, no! - No, no, he got off!
- Aah! - No, no, he got off!
- No, no, he got off!
- No, no, no!
- No, no! - No, no, he got off!
Wow, it's heavy!
- It's really heavy! - Hey, watch out!
- Hey, hey! - It's heavy!
- Hey, hey! - Wow!
Wow!
- It's heavy! - Wow!
- Hey!
- Wow!
- Hey! - Whoa!
I laughed a lot today.
You saved me today.
- Are you better now? - Thank you.
- Are you better now? - I'm better now.
3 a.m.
This time, as a new detective,
we hired five men who have worked as detectives for ten years.
They have overcome many difficulties and are now
in a moment of joy.
I hope you're happy.
Listen up! This mission is over.
- Yes! - Yes!
- You did well. - You did well.
- Thank you. - Thank you.
Shall we go?
- Whoa! - All right!
- Whoa! - It's over.
- It's over.
- Here you go. - Whoa!
- Here you go. - Congratulations!
- That was fast.
- Congratulations! - Congratulations!
Thank you for your hard work.
- Thank you for your hard work. - Thank you for your hard work.
This year, it's Monkey Year.
I'd like to do an I.O.I. work at Monkey Year with Shio's temperature.
- Shio, thank you. - Yes.
Monkey Year's...
- Sa! - Best Comrades.
- Ru! - No Rules.
- Do! - No Rules.
Continue to run anywhere.
- Si! - Shigemori and Satomi...
...will live on with you.
- What was that? - Two and three legs.
- "I want to live with you." - Yeah.
- Shigemori and Satomi. - Thank you for this year's award.
Thank you.
Thank you very much!
Hot!
Out!
Isn't that amazing?
- Shigemori and Satomi... - What is he saying?
- They're acting right now. - What's he saying?
Ow! Ow!
- It hurts! - Ow!
It hurts!
- I want to go with both of them. - Everyone, once you cross that gate, it's over.
- Thank you for your hard work. - Thank you for your hard work.
- Congratulations. - Congratulations.
- I hope this year will be happy too. - I hope so too.
- Yes, it's over. - Wow, what a relief!
- It's over. - It's over.
This is the first time I've seen such a woman
Like!
She looks like a normal woman
She looks like a very old woman
Middle finger...
Thumb...
You're so cute, I want to kiss you
My heart is broken
These feelings are so painful
I'm jealous of you
My heart is broken
These feelings are so painful
I'm jealous of you
My heart is broken
These feelings are so painful
I'm jealous of you
My heart is broken
I'm sorry.
Stop it.
I'm sorry.
I said I expected a loser,
but it's not my style.
My heart is broken.
It's not like me at all.
It's a comical riot.
I'm embarrassed because you laugh at me.
I don't want you to see me like this.
Everything started with the words we exchanged.
I want you to get hurt,
but I want you to believe in me and not let me destroy you.
I want you to watch over me.
I will take you to a tomorrow where you can smile again.
That's true.
The title of the new year has been announced.
How do you feel? Do you think you will win?
No, I don't think I will win.
I don't think you will win.
I saw you earlier and you were happy.
I was happy.
I'm not happy at all.
Why don't you do it, Mr. Hamada?
I stopped him.
What do you mean?
It was snowing at the end.
Stop it! Stop it!
Mr. Hamada, don't do it!
When I saw you in the camera earlier, you looked like Mr. Machiaki.
You should have said it at that time.
No, I thought I was in the way of saying it at that time.
I'm in the way of saying it now.
Let's have fun in 2016, too!
"Don't Laugh, Detective!" at 24 o'clock!
For those who want to watch it again from the beginning, please go to Hulu!
The great masterpieces are also being streamed daily!