AISubs v3.4
"Gaki no Tsukai" special program, "Pitch Change"!
In a harsh situation where you can't skate, a real entertainer evolves!
And tonight's entertainer is...
In the first episode of "Gaki no Tsukai"...
Fujiwara Fujimoto!
It's been a while!
Today is Fujiwara's day...
It's not Harani's day.
I wonder why it's not Harani's day!
Fujiwara will skate today.
He's not the kind of guy who laughs like that.
What do you mean?
He's the kind of guy who works hard and is healthy.
Let's have him skate for us.
Here you go, Fujiwara!
Thank you!
Why is it Harani's day?
It's definitely Harani's day.
It said "Fujimoto" instead of "Tsukai".
That's weird!
You're late!
It's still early for someone like me.
Oh, really?
Was "Tsukai" this small?
You have a big face!
"Tsukai" has a big face, but it doesn't feel small.
We're in 25th place...
Komaru is in first place.
He's in first place.
Right?
Which place will you be in?
I want to win against 13th place, Hagi.
13th place, Hagi...
Do you think this is an important turning point for you to win?
Do you think you can still win?
Can you still do it?
Can you say "fwaaah" like this?
I don't want you to say "fwaaah"!
I think it's better for you to stop here.
You're right.
I think it's better for you to stop here.
I've been an entertainer for 25 years,
so I know what entertainers look like before they slide.
Will he...
Fujimoto's ability and what not!
This program is brought to you by the following sponsors.
W-w-what do we do about this?
What do we do?
What?
Hamada Presents entertainer impersonator.
Why Hamada Presents?
Because this guy can't impersonate!
Is this a personal gift?
I don't think it's me.
Maybe Hamada will do it.
I-I don't know.
Hamada will prepare it, right?
What?
Hamada will prepare it, right?
What did you say?
Hamada said it.
I just heard Hamada say it.
You heard it, didn't you?!
Even so, doesn't everyone want to see this?
This is a tourist attraction with all its bad things.
Wow, this is...
I want to go there.
There are a lot of frogs, right?
No, there aren't.
Well, it's a frog paradise.
It's a paradise.
But is there anything that Yamami Shimatsu has been doing since he was young?
Yes, there is.
He was doing it.
Yes, I think it's interesting.
It wasn't slippery at all.
Don't bring it up like that.
It was funny.
Kiyoto-san and...
I'll go see Tom-san in the morning.
Okay?
You can't laugh like that.
It's a non-reaction.
It's not like you're laughing.
You don't want me to laugh?
I told you, didn't I?
Shut up, you!
Shut up and get out of here!
You have a gun, don't you?!
What?!
You don't have a gun, do you?!
Put me down!
What?!
What do you want me to do?!
What?! What do you mean?!
It's not your fault!
What do you mean?!
It's your fault!
You always blame others for everything!
No!
Don't say that!
What's wrong with you?!
It's not my fault!
It's not because you didn't do it properly!
It's not?!
You're always like this!
You always blame others for everything!
What?!
It's...
It's because of you!
Talk!
It's because of you!
Talk!
What should I say?!
What do you want me to say?!
I will never talk!
Huh? You bald head!
You're a bald head!
Bald head!
Baaaald head!
Bald head!
You're not a woman!
What does the bald head have to do with it?!
You look like you've had a toothache.
What did you say?
Shut up!
What are you doing?
Stop it!
Why are you doing this?
Calm down.
What are you doing?
Shut up!
What are you doing?
Stop it!
What are you doing?
You look like you've had a toothache.
What did you say?
Shut up!
This is not a comedy!
It's not!
It's not?
It's not.
It was amazing.
He was panting like crazy.
Sit down.
It's amazing that he didn't do it himself.
He didn't do it himself.
He entrusted it to his parents.
Have you ever seen an entertainer entrust it to his parents?
It was his first time.
He entrusted it to his parents.
It's amazing.
But it's about time...
It's about time...
[Laughter]
If you can't hook one or two, you can't go on like this.
[Laughter]
That's right.
Hmm...
I...
In Tanaka...
I still have more.
I still have more, but...
He's dirty, isn't he?
Look at this.
It's a long poem.
It's a one-line poem.
How many lines are you going to say?
It's true, isn't it?
It's so funny.
It's true.
He was doing it like this.
Is it the next story?
It's the next one.
I wonder where it's going to come out of.
You look like you're having fun.
[Laughter]
It's very sad.
A new...
[Inhales deeply and exhales]
It's sad.
In Dantou...
I don't think anyone has ever gone there.
Good morning, Kunio Budo.
Recently?
Good morning, Kunio Budo.
Recently?
Good morning, Kunio Budo.
Recently?
Recently, I've been studying abroad.
Studying abroad?
I've been riding in the waves.
Riding in the waves? You're not riding.
Regularly?
Yes. Zero.
Zero?!
Yes.
Who was the one who named you Fujiwara?
Oh, um... Nakai-san.
Me?
Yes, Natsugi.
You know...
When Fujiwara is skating...
I feel like I'm skating too.
Show me your salary card.
Oh, yes.
The latest one.
Yes.
It's short.
Tenshoku Festival
"Tenshoku Festival" you say?
Yes.
Is this how you earn 60,000 yen?
No, well...
It's "two-step".
No, "two-step" makes 60,000 yen.
"One-step" makes 10,000 yen times 1.5 means 15,000 yen.
No, it's not like that.
I only work like this for a month.
Huh?
Yes.
Huh?!
No.
I have something to say.
No, no, the opposite.
The opposite.
I'm working hard too.
No, you're not.
Do you want to do comedy?
That's not comedy.
It's not comedy.
It's comedy.
That's not comedy.
Excuse me.
It's not comedy.
Excuse me.
It's not comedy.
Excuse me.
He's so mean.
Mr. Munakai, you're so mean.
When I looked at you and you came towards me, you were so mean.
You're a real genius, aren't you?
I've seen you a lot.
You're too mean.
You're better at talking than being a comedian.
I've always wondered about it.
Why is it that every time his comedy ends, this one gets more excited?
He's so mean.
I knock down the car seat and smell it again.
I smell the cigarette smoke all over the four- seater room.
It's slippery, it's still slippery.
I turn the morning glow into background music.
The ugly woman is still eating side dishes.
It's slippery, it's still slippery.
Go in, go in, go in home.
The disappearing dream is still
the place I want to go back to.
With your chest, the glass of Hamada is gone.
If I were Tsukamoto, I would have kicked him a little more.
If I had done this, I would have just said bad things about him.
I will never forget his bitter laugh at the moment of his departure.
It was a bitter laugh.
I was told that I would die like that.
It was funny for me last year.
Good morning.
This is your hat for today.
Yeah, a little.
Do you want me to cut it a little?
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, this is a little bigger.
This is bigger.
Oh, my head hurts so much.
It hurts a little.
Oh, this, this, this.
This fits in here.
Oh, it's a little too much.
Yeah.
Do you still have it?
Yes.
Oh, this.
Oh, not at all.
It doesn't fit at all.
Oh, this.
It says "love" here.
Should I go with this?
This?
Yes.
Oh, thank you.
I'll go with this.
Two more.
He came at you with one shot.
But that's not Fujimo-san's strength.
That's terrible.
You're right.
Where is it, Gundam?
I found it, Gundam!
Raise your arms, Gundam!
Arms...
Gunton!
Come on!
What...
What are you doing?
I'll open it!
Good, open it!
I'll open it!
Good, open it!
I'll open it!
Good job!
I'll open it!
His is more interesting.
I'll show you a bit of an avant-garde play.
Can I sing?
He doesn't have a voice at all.
Wait a minute.
You have to gather the right words again.
Oh, I see.
Wow!
It's okay to be scared, isn't it?
Oh yes! Feelings are important!
I love you!
Tell me! Tell me!
I'm not lonely!
You really showed me that?
That's so weird!
That's so cool!
It's really dirty!
It's dirty!
I was taking off my pants for it!
So you really did it!
My ears are exposed!
This guy...
He's been adding more in the back!
He's been adding it!
This is amazing!
I've never seen my butt so swollen like this!
In such a short period of time!
But if that was a push-up, it'd be amazing!
If that was a push-up, it'd be amazing!
It hurts! It hurts! It hurts!
This hurts!
I've worn socks on my feet!
It hurts! It hurts! It hurts!
This is a bad omen!
It's really dirty!
If that was a push-up...
I'd be lonely!
If it was a push-up...
I guess it would be amazing!
It's a shame!
30,000 yen!
I'll pay you!
- 30,000... - Huh?
- Good morning! - Good morning!
- We got 30,000 yen! - Huh?! Huh?! Huh?!
- 35,000 yen! - Huh?!
- 9th place! - Wow!
- We got it right away! - 9th place!
- Wow! - It's exactly as calculated!
- It's exactly as calculated? - You small-ass bastards!
- Yes! - You're the only one whose butt is hard to see!
- Is it you?!
- That's why you should save it and eat it up! - Eat it up and eat it up!
- It hurts... - He suddenly got energetic after getting his butt shaved!
Ladies and gentlemen...
How are you?
I'm fine, and you?
It's been a while since I heard you laugh every month with your license.
No, they always say that.
Do you have a license?
That's enough.
You shouldn't have said that, but you do have a license!
That's enough, I've done it all my life.
Well, I was pooping a little bit before the show,
and now I have to go to the bathroom in my house, and it opens by itself, and if I pull it out, it flows by itself.
If you get used to it...
You have money...
But you know, it's amazing that you knew about it.
You're like me, aren't you?
Why do you sound like a high-ranking official?
And you know what?
The other day I went to the store and I didn't flush the poop.
Right?!
You thought it would flow.
I thought it would flow!
So I just went ahead and flushed it.
And when I came out of the door, I was like, "No, I'm going to flush it!"
What's that?
Do you know? I'm a little angry now, but the washing machine is too good now, and it's like a child's rock.
And I can't open the dryer!
In the middle of it! No, it's okay! If you look at it, it's really dry!
It's definitely dry! Fluffy, fluffy, fluffy!
But like I said, I want it to be completely dry.
I want it, but it's a little... I was a little young.
You did it too much.
I did it too much! I'm sorry! It's fluffy, fluffy, fluffy!
I want to open it, but it's like a child's rock!
That was TBS, wasn't it?
It's like a child's rock! It doesn't open! What's wrong with you?!
So it's hot when the time comes?
And if you press the unlock button...
If you press it, it's hot?
From there... No, it doesn't open, does it?
From there, it's in the cool-down.
I see.
It's hot now, so from there, it's 5 minutes, 10 minutes. If it's not, it'll do it for another two hours!
That's terrible!
But that's how all Japanese manufacturers do it now.
Oh, I didn't know that.
I wanted to open it, but I waited for about 20 minutes.
Then I finally opened it!
You should have done something about it.
I don't know what you're talking about.
I just want to look at it for a long time.
I can't do anything else.
If you do something else, you'll forget about it.
But it's done.
Then I opened it and it wasn't dry!
What are you talking about?
If you do it again, it will take a long time from cooling down to warming up.
That's because you made a mistake.
It wasn't dry, was it?
That's not it.
What is "child rock" anyway?
I don't know.
What is "child rock" anyway?
You said you wouldn't open it, didn't you?
What happens if you open it?
You'll get burned.
I won't get burned!
My underwear is burning because it's so hot!
What are you talking about?
You shouldn't say "it won't open" like that!
It won't open!
If you get out of the car and it's "child rock", won't you go home?
No, I won't.
What?!
You know, next to the door.
You know, the seat behind you.
It's next to you, isn't it?
And if you don't know what it is and you blow on it, it will pop out of there.
And if it's "child rock", it won't open from the inside!
It won't open from the outside.
That's right!
You know, I don't like this kind of thing.
To be honest, I don't want to put a woman behind me and say "hide yourself!"
You know, you shouldn't say that!
Well, you're right, but...
You know, "hide yourself!"
And if I say "get out of the car now", it won't open!
It won't open!
What is it?
It's like an energy first!
If you take a picture of it, it's the worst!
It's the worst! It's the worst thing you've ever done!
That's right!
So you're giving out electronics for people who have children and those who don't, right?
That's what you're like!
I'm sure it'll be more troublesome for you because you've got a cramp and got hurt!
Do you have a sleigh at home?
I do have a sleigh at home.
Why?
You know, there are things you don't want people to see, right?
Like what?
Like crooked things.
They're crooked!
Like a sleigh!
Oh, a sleigh!
You should cut it properly!
I'll cut it.
What is it?
No, it's not cut vertically anymore. It's all cut!
It's so finely cut!
Even if it's cut vertically, it's all cut!
It's so finely cut!
Mine is really finely cut!
Yours isn't finely cut, though.
I see.