AISubs v3.4
"Hitchhiking" is a special program for children.
In the past, strong men of history challenged hitchhiking.
One man earned glory and fame.
Another man was wounded in the heart and died on the road.
As the evolution of an entertainer is taking place,
its pressure and imagination are overshadowed.
And tonight, Hitchhiking entertainer and chairman, Kouboto, will hitchhike.
What is his ability like?
In the first episode of "Gaki no Tsukai Arahen",
11-year-old chairman Kouboto will hitchhike.
11 years?
That's right.
But this painful atmosphere...
Well...
That's about it.
What is your past achievement like?
Well...
For now...
Well...
Bob is...
Well...
That's right.
What will happen this time?
What will happen?
Please come in!
Thank you!
Thank you for coming!
You come out from time to time, don't you?
Well, you're right!
Your face looks strange.
But, you know, we're about to start our opening talk.
In this situation, you know, there's this weird atmosphere.
Especially, Yamazaki is very jealous of those who come from below.
That's true!
This program is brought to you by the following sponsors.
What should we do?
What should we do about this?
I'm Tanaka Gagappa's usual inquisitive team.
What do you do, Tanaka?
I don't do anything.
I'm always in a good position.
If you get wet in the water, it's the worst.
That's right.
You'll shrink, right? You won't be able to laugh.
You'll get sick and catch a cold.
You'll catch a cold and have a runny nose.
Goodbye, Yamazaki Hosei. Really.
No, no, that's not true.
Really, Yama-chan? You've been off for half a year now.
No, no, no.
Really, goodbye.
I'll leave this guy here and all of you can quit.
Goodbye.
- He's not at home. - Welcome.
- Welcome.
My wife...
Dammit...
Is he really okay?
Huh?
I wasn't left to him.
- My wife! My wife! - Hey!
My wife!
- You're wet. - You're still wet!
- You're still wet!
Sorry, sorry. My wife, I didn't have a choice.
What are you doing?
It's been a really long time, right?
I'm in charge of women and you're in charge of slang.
We've been working on that for a while now!
That's enough, right?
- You're really... - Let me off.
Let's see if you can't do it tomorrow.
- Can you not do it tomorrow? - What's wrong with you?
- You're really... - Ah, ah, ah, ah...
I'm telling you to do it properly.
I have to apologize again?
The attorney general arrived.
The attorney general arrived?
It should you have done it.
You should have done it.
You shouldn't do it for a civilian's cause.
The attorney general did it.
It should you have done it.
What are you talking about?
Isn't that the last one?
That's right!
I admitted it.
You surprised me.
I admitted it.
Thank you!
Please stay still!
Thank you!
I admitted it.
(sound of opening package)
(sound of closing package)
(sound of opening package)
What did you do?
Don't worry about it.
Don't you know how humans work?
If you were a youkai, you'd know.
Shit!
Kitadoro!
Yes?
It can't be!
Hey, Kitadoro...
There's a youkai who tried to kill me in here!
Okay, I'll look for it.
(laughs)
That's him!
Oh, this guy! Do it! Do it!
(laughs)
I did it! I'm glad you came! Thank you! Thank you!
I'm glad you came! Thank you! Thank you!
Let's go!
He has nothing to do with it!
Oh, come on!
What's this?
He's the one who chose it.
He's got a smiley face.
That's right.
Even if you look at me properly, I'm not good at this.
You got anything?
Well...
You know...
Huh?
I knew you'd be here.
Kaori!
Wow!
Down-down.
Wow!
It's real!
You shouldn't speak too loudly.
They tell you not to speak too much in private.
What about red autographs?
Autographs are probably not allowed later.
Matsumoto hates that kind of thing the most.
But you said you had an affair with Matsumoto many times.
What?
You shouldn't say that.
What?
If you don't have an affair with Matsumoto, you shouldn't be a comedian.
Matsumoto hates that kind of thing the most.
But the other day...
You went home with Tanaka when I called you.
You were there, too.
You shouldn't say things like that.
I didn't know Matsumoto hated that kind of thing.
But when you went home last time, Endo took you home.
Really?
No! When I went home with Endo, Endo took me home.
No!
You told him!
No! He'll get mad at me!
I hate that kind of thing the most!
You shouldn't say things like that!
You should love Matsumoto more!
That's funny.
You usually say you love him.
But you say you love Matsumoto in front of everyone.
This is amazing!
Amazing!
If we keep doing this, we'll get rid of Bob Sapp.
We will!
You're lying.
Yes, Raiken.
You should be ashamed of yourself!
(Phone ringing)
Yes, Lai Lai Ken.
I'll make you eat it!
(Phone ringing)
Yes, Lai Lai Ken.
It's not bowling!
Can someone laugh a little?
Staff is stupid.
The staff is stupid!
Lairan Ken is getting clearer and clearer.
He was quiet at first.
But he's getting more and more like Lairan Ken.
He's getting more and more like Lairan Ken.
Right.
I think he's really strong.
(clears throat)
It's getting worse.
It's getting worse and worse.
I have to quit.
Please.
Ah, hello.
Ah, sorry for bothering you all the time.
I'm Komoto.
Um... I'd like you to play again.
I'm Hamada.
Down, down. Yes.
No, it's not Shouyei. I'm Hamada.
Yes, sorry.
Please, excuse me.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry about that.
Hey, Hamada.
Yes?
What are you doing with your butt out?
Huh?
Digging up...
Butt...
Digging up...
D-digging up...
I'm sorry.
Thank you. I'm sorry.
Digging up...
That's Hamada's...
Digging up...
You're always digging up, aren't you?
I'm digging up so much that I can't hit you.
No, but only money.
I see.
Here we go.
I don't know what it is.
♪ EX-AID TRICK, EX-AID TRICK, SHOW ME MORE
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Go home already!
Oh, this is amazing!
This is amazing!
45,000...
63,000 yen!
Wow!
Which means...
Number one!
Master!
This is dirty!
I don't know why I came here, but I have a small child anyway.
It's top! It's on top of the bobsled!
It's first place!
It's first place! It's amazing!
I paid for it all!
That's right!
All of it!
That's right!
If Shioda was looking around and was seen by Yamazaki...
That's right!
I'm sorry!
Ladies and Gentlemen!
It's up to your heart to judge a person's nature.
That's right.
Please tell me the real meaning of "carpaccio".
What kind of "carpaccio" do you like?
What kind of "carpaccio"?
There are many kinds of "carpaccio".
Tuna "carpaccio".
Ah!
I don't like any of them.
Surprisingly, there are many people who don't know the meaning of "carpaccio".
That's right.
I'll tell you the real meaning of it.
I won't forget you.
The real meaning of it?
The real meaning of it is that I'll forget you.
Did you say it to me?
No, no.
I won't forget you!
Is that the real meaning of it?
No, I won't forget you.
That's why "tuna carpaccio" is...
Tuna, I won't forget you.
From whose point of view is it "I won't forget you"?
From youth's point of view.
From youth's point of view?
From high school teacher's point of view.
That's why I saw something amazing.
I saw something really cool.
At first, yes.
I saw you swimming with all your might.
Why are you repeating yourself?
That's enough!
It's not cool!
It was amazing!
Yes, yes, yes.
That tuna was...
fried and...
Yes.
You know it was "katchinkocchi" fried, don't you?
What am I?
You might think like that.
For a tuna.
For a tuna, yes, yes.
Because...
it was really fun!
Wow, it was fun!
Wow!
Like that.
Wow!
That's enough!
What's with you?
It's not cool!
Stop talking!
What's with you?
It was fun!
I get it!
That's enough!
I thought there might be something more,
but I was surprised myself.
"Wow!" I said.
"What? What? What?" I thought.
"Are you going to eat me?" I said.
Yes, yes, yes.
"Are you going to eat me?" I thought.
Are you not going to eat me for real?!
Are you only going to kill me?!
That's what happened.
And then...
I got hit.
I was rolling in my bed.
I got hit.
"What? Again?!" I thought.
What? What? What?
What are you talking about?!
What? Again?!
Where? Where? Where?!
This is it! It's done! It's done!
Pepper!
It's done!
Finally!
Finally! Come on! Tuna!
I'll never forget you!
Was it really that fun?
Even if you say that all cells are made of kindness,
I have a question for Matsumoto.
At the end, Matsumoto-san, please tell us about the situation in which you used the word "doumai".
But it's only been 4 or 5 years.
"doumai".
The last time I used it was...
What situation?
Was it about 2 years ago?
Don't say such old stories.
It was when you went to the video studio, right?
That's right.
I haven't used "doumai" since then.
No, I'm just saying it.
What was the situation at the time?
I got out of the car and...
I did this automatically and it went "bang"!
I thought I could open it, but I couldn't, so it went "gaah"!
"I'm sorry!" I said.
It's okay.
Oh, that's...
That's where you were.
That's weird.
I went "hmmm" and came in.
I came in and...
There were a lot of videos!
Gyah, yassha!
Sir! Sir! Are you okay?!
I'm okay!
Where do you say 'doumai'?
I was watching it.
I was watching what was going on.
There was a guy in a golden suit.
He stepped on me.
I'm sorry! It was hard to see!
Oh, there!
Ow, ow, ow, ow!
There were a lot of things.
I couldn't find what I was looking for.
So...
Excuse me...
Do you have 'doumai'?
Do you have 'zoku doumai'?
This question is for Matsumoto-san, who has a calendar of all his schedules for the year.
May 24th is said to be 'downtown' day, but what is Matsumoto-san doing on this day every year?
I've never heard of it.
Why don't you know about it?
No, I don't know about it.
I'm sure you've said it before, but it's 'go west'.
It doesn't say anything about it.
I'm asking you why it's 'downtown' day.
But you can read it as 'go west'.
Anyway, what are you doing on this day?
Anyway...
What are you doing on this 'downtown' day every year?
It's 'pomade becchori', you know.
Seriously.
It's morning and I'm hungry.
What the hell is that 'pomade becchori'?
It's 'go nishia', you know.
What the hell are you talking about?
It's amazing.
Are you stupid or what?
'Pomade becchori'... What are you doing?
What are you doing?
No, I don't wear 'pomade' like this.
I wear 'naga naga' T-shirt.
What?
I wear 'naga naga' T-shirt.
What are you doing?
For example...
February 2nd.
'Fukuwa uchi no hi', right?
What?
February 3rd?
'Setsubun'.
'Setsubun', yes.
Do you know what 'setsubun' day is?
Isn't it 'mamegake' day?
That's what it is.
But why are you asking me about it on that day?
This kind of thing doesn't have a reason.
Then why are you asking me about it on 'setsubun' day?
Because we've been doing it for a long time.
Right? Then 'setsubun' day is 'go west'.
'Pomade becchori' and 'long' T-shirt, isn't it good?
But we can't do anything about it.
Yes.
If you say so, I don't want you to show me your underwear.
When did you start doing it?
'Setsubun' day is 'go west'.
If you can't do it today, then don't do it, you idiot!
'May 25th' is 'shoudekita' day.
Until now you've been calling me...
'yesterday' kind of...
'yesterday' kind of feeling.
I don't know about that!
'May 23rd' is 'Good job, tomorrow' kind of feeling.
'Go Nishi' and 'pomade becchori'...
That's right.
Your T-shirt is getting shorter and shorter.
No, I don't want you to hide it!
It's like your 'osechi'.
What do you mean?
You used to make 'osechi' with a lot of effort, didn't you?
Yes.
But now that we're old, we've been taking it easy, haven't we?
It's the same with that.
At first you were wearing a 'long' T-shirt, but...
It's getting shorter and shorter...
T-shirt?
It's 'heins' now, since last year.
No, it doesn't look thin anymore!
I don't even wear 'pomade' anymore.
What?!
You still don't wear it?
Well, it's not 'pomade' anymore...
It's like 'kadasui'.
The latest one.
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