AISubs v3.4
Are you watching, Mrs. Tsubasa?
In the first episode of "Kids' Fires", we'll have a close-up survey of Dantan!
As you can see today...
What is it?
A close-up survey of Dantan.
Oh, is that so?
Yes. Well, we'll see how far he's been instructed by various people of different ages...
...and what the results will be.
Today, just before we went to the bathroom...
...two girls entered the ladies' bathroom.
"If we don't go now, it'll start," they said...
...while they were pooping.
First of all...
Old Man and Old Woman.
Old Man and Old Woman will see this picture.
Who do you like?
That's what you're asking, isn't it?
You can't say.
This is Dantan.
Here we go.
"Dantan", "Futaoji", "Kinya", "Satomi", "Koutaro", "Tsugi", "Ryotaro", "Takahashi", "Hideki", "Matsudaira" and "Ken".
There's no way you can win like this!
How can you win?
Old Man and Old Woman will see this picture.
Us, 20 people will see this picture...
...and which member will we be among Old Man and Old Woman?
That's what you're asking, isn't it?
Let's view this picture again.
"Futaoji", of course...
"Satomi", "Koutaro"...
"Ken", "Ryotaro"...
"Ken", "Ryotaro"....
"Me", "Kina", "Senwarau"...
"Kanya", "Satomi", "Koutaro"...
"Kinya", "Satomi", "Koutaro"...
"Senwarau", "Kentaro", "Katashi"...
I see.
"Takahashi", "Hideki", "Sanfarangani"...
After all, "Satomi", "Koutaro"...
"Kutaoji", "Kinya"...
"Takahashi", "Hideki"...
"Suinryo", "Taro"...
"Kutaoji", "Kinya"...
I can't understand everything.
"Takahashi", "Hideki"...
This person is manly and nice.
"Satomi", "Koutaro"...
"Takahashi", "Hideki"...
And...
"Grandpa and Grandma" episode is number one, after all.
"Takahashi", "Hideki"...
Oh!
And "Satomi", "Koutaro"...
"Sankita", "Ojiki", "Niya"...
"Sugi", "Ryo", "Taka"...
"Masara" and "Ken"...
And of course, we are "Reihyo".
This is simply...
For example, if "Takahashi", "Hideki"...
die in something...
we are "Reihyo" is "Reihyo"...
"Reihyo" is "Reihyo"...
"Reihyo"...
So, for example, "Satomi" and "Koutaro"...
Even if they don't die in the hospital...
we are "Reihyo" after all...
This is useless...
Right?
I see...
For "Sugi-chan" and "Taka"...
there is nothing...
Nothing at all...
Right?
There is no interest at all...
There is nothing at all...
Well...
Let's go to the next one...
The next one is "Girls High School" episode...
It is like this...
"Downtown"...
"Eugee"...
"Fukuyama"...
Well...
What is it?
I don't know!
No, I don't know it...
But, recently...
"Fukuyama"...
It is...
It is very popular, isn't it?
Yes, it is...
As a man...
I am definitely superior...
"Mock"...
"Fukuyama"...
"Masaharu"...
"Eugee"...
"Wild"...
"Downtown"...
"Mock"...
"Osaka"...
"Fukuyama"...
"Masaharu"...
"Motoki"...
"Sexy"...
"Fukuyama"...
"Masaharu"...
"Downtown"...
"Eugee"...
"Fukuyama"...
"Masaharu"...
"Fukuyama"...
"Masaharu"...
"Eugee"...
"Mock"...
"Fukuyama"...
"A cold apple"...
"Downtown"...
WOW!
Available in Japan...
Even if we have to do it together, I don't mind it...
I don't know it at all.
This one, this one, right?
Where did it come from and what is it?
I don't know at all!
Tell me!
What is it? What is it that came out of it?
A drama? A drama came out of it?
I don't know at all! Tell me!
The other day, I was popular with foreign people who looked like they were going to break something.
Yes, of course I am, but Akebono, Shiwaki-chan, Samkon, Kevin Kosuna, Michael Jackson.
Ah, so it's either Michael Jackson here or Kevin Kosuna right now, isn't it?
I think I'm better than Akebono.
No, I don't know.
This is frustrating.
I'm better than him.
If it's Akebono, I can beat him by myself.
Yes, it's Akebono.
Go!
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Arnold Schwarzenegger is the best.
Kevin Costner.
Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Akebono.
Kevin Costner.
Akebono.
He symbolizes the American spirit in Japan.
I like Arnold.
Schwarzenegger, yes, in downtown...
Usman Sanko.
He has my first... my same name.
Akebono.
Kevin Costner.
I think Kevin Costner is my favorite.
He seems to be really like a family man.
Downtown...
It's fun.
Akebono.
Akebono!
He came in first place.
Akebono!
He came in first place.
Oh, no!
He was selfish...
Is it true?
You're alone in downtown.
It's fun.
Do you know what you're saying?
It's fun.
Let's go to the last one.
The last one.
The last one is Okama edition.
Okama bar in Roppongi.
If you go this way...
If you look at this picture...
Downtown...
Uchanancha...
Katojankencha...
Tunnel...
Honjabaka...
Yasujikiyoshi...
I don't want to be in first place.
Downtown...
I like it.
Tunnels...
Uchanancha...
Katojankencha...
Uchanancha...
Tunnels...
Yasujikiyoshi...
Downtown...
Honjabaka...
The best thing about this year is...
Uchanancha...
I think it's very cute.
Uchanancha...
I think it's Downtown.
Katochan and Kenchan.
Yasushi and Kiyochan.
Downtown.
Yay, yay, yay!
Downtown.
So, you don't like first place?
No, I don't like Katochan and Kiyochan.
You don't like Kiyochan and Kiyochan?
No, I don't like Katochan and Kiyochan.
If they were first place, it would be my fault.
That's right.
I'm not saying which one, but I'm saying Downtown.
I see.
So, Mr. Hamada, let's leave first place here.
What can you say about Downtown?
What's your strategy for the future?
First of all, it's definitely no good for children.
Children and grandparents...
Grandparents and grandmothers are the worst.
Well, it's only for Okawa and high school girls.
High school girls are the worst!
Ladies and Gentlemen...
We've seen this before, haven't we?
Recently, I've been getting up pretty early.
That's not a good thing.
I've gotten into a good pattern.
Oh, is that so?
So, when it's around midnight or 1 a.m., I get really sleepy.
Oh...
I get really sleepy!
You've changed, haven't you?
Yes, I've changed.
I'm like an old man now.
Oh...
So, I go to bed and when it's around 10 a.m., I wake up.
In the morning?
Yes.
And I go to the convenience store downstairs and eat by myself.
In school?
Yes.
Oh...
I watch "Wide Show" and eat by myself.
You're a chef!
I'm a chef!
I'm a real chef!
Wow!
And when I hear "saudade" I go and have a look.
You're lying!
You're a liar!
You...
Hey!
How much do you weigh?!
Oh...
So, when it's around midnight, I get really sleepy.
Your habits up till now...
Oh, so you get really sleepy.
And you put up with it for a long time.
You put up with it.
You work.
Yes, yes, yes.
And when you go home, it's midnight.
You go to sleep right away.
You go to sleep.
In the past, you'd wake up in the morning and sleep in the evening.
Even if you woke up in the morning, you'd still be in bed.
I don't know about that!
In the past it was like that, but now it's different!
You're an old man now!
When it's midnight, you go to sleep.
And when you get up in the morning, you wake up and go to sleep.
What are you doing?!
When it's midnight...
The King's ears are...
One, two, three, four!
The news is pretty strong right now. I know it pretty well.
Yeah. You know...
The arrow that hit...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What?
The duck.
The duck, duck.
They've been doing it for a while now.
Yeah.
That kind of thing.
That, that, that...
They've been doing it for a while now...
The arrow that hit the duck...
Isn't it disgusting?!
It's disgusting and...
I can't decide on a name for it, but...
Recently, "dumpling" has been doing it.
"Dumpling"...
"Dumpling" has been...
I don't want you to name it like that.
"Dumpling" has been doing it.
Why is everyone so interested in it?
It's actually on sale now.
If everyone's paying attention to that, I'll...
I'll hit you in the shoulder.
Hey, you're paying attention, so...
I'll hit you like this.
Hey, let me do it!
You're the one who got stabbed!
You're annoying!
You're an old man, so you can't do it like that!
Well, I might get angry if I say it like that, but...
That "dumpling" is a little...
That "dumpling" is a little... outdated.
Outdated.
Is that so?
That, that...
That, that... Isn't it really stabbed?
Isn't it stabbed?
No, I've been a little weak lately.
My legs are a little...
I've been acting a little.
That "dumpling" is on sale now.
It's on sale now.
My sister was also stabbed from the side.
Think about it!
That "dumpling" hasn't penetrated your body yet.
There's no way it'll be on sale for a week like that!
You've always been in a good mood, haven't you?
What do you mean "good"?
I've always been in a good mood!
You're going too far!
What do you mean "good"?
It's just that it's not fatal.
It's no good if you're stabbed forever.
That's what I'm saying!
The moment you saw it, you were stabbed and stabbed.
How can you decide like that?
You're stabbed and stabbed!
It's like that.
It won't rise even if you bite it.
The maid did something about it.
It's like that.
Since you were born, you've had that kind of pain like that.
You're stabbed in the back?
No, I don't think so.
Why not?
You can only think of that.
It's like that!
He was shot! He was shot and his back was cut off!
I don't know if he was shot or not.
Did he do it himself or like this?
Like this.
It's a little funny, isn't it?
Yes, but he was doing his best.
He brought a net and said it, but it didn't work.
It's stupid, isn't it? Those animals.
He's trying to help them, but they're running away.
I don't know.
Why is it so hard to catch them with such a big net?
If you can't do that, you can't go to the hospital anymore.
Why can't you do it?
You're in good shape.
You can't do like that!
You're like this.
Today you were somewhere again.
What?
Can you hit me?
Why can't I stand in the middle of the show?
Somehow I'm attacked by the enemy.
I've been attacked like "ka" before.
I thought the enemy came and I couldn't attack like "ka".
That's his weapon, isn't it?
What?
That's his weapon, isn't it?
I think you should try it once.
It hurts!
No, no.
"Kyun-so-issho-okamu".
What are you saying?
You're saying something! You're saying something!
Even a cat with a rat's face will bite you.
If you attack me like "ka" in the corner, I'll run away like "ka" in the beginning.
But if you attack me like "kan" in the middle of the show, I'll run away like "kyun-so-issho- okamu".
Is it "kyun-so-issho-okamu"?
What is it?
"Kyun-so-issho-okamu".
I have a question.
What kind of bridge do you use?
Is it "sai-bashi"?
Don't get angry!
Don't attack me!
Can you be quiet?
He's pretty good-looking, isn't he?
The other day, you said something like that, didn't you?
Yes, yes, yes.
On New Year's Eve, you wrote me a letter.
Yes, yes, yes.
I'm not sleeping!
Do you want me to kill you?
You're not sleeping, either!
Do you want me to kill you?
He's been up all night. He's not sleeping.
Is that so? Wait a minute. I'm sure there's someone who hasn't slept with him.
It's Tokumitsu.
He was dragged around last night.
Sorry, Hama-chan, I've been up all night.
I'm with him now.
Is that so?
Hurry up and go home. It's not open yet.
I know.
Don't cry.
Well, I won't touch you anymore.
You can't touch me!
Right?
If you say it again, I'll say it again.
That's right.
Um... Is that all?
Your pen name is "Mukatsuki Makuri-san"?
Yes.
You're fired!
It's the "Matcha-Ni-Ni Quiz Challenge" corner!
Who's going to challenge?
"a" and "i" and "u" and "a" and "o" have competed for 100 meters!
Now, who was the first one to reach the finish line?
"Shinkin-tan"!
The answer... the answer... is E... E... Ryo Inoichiman! Yay! Yay! Yay!
I have a question. Even if you bite your nose, nosebleed comes out. Where does this nosebleed come from? And why does nosebleed exist? Please tell me.
I don't know yet.
So in the end it's not some kind of notice.
I know you're not feeling well.
If you say it's some kind of notice, I know.
Are you drunk?
You say it's some kind of notice.
Hey! What's wrong with you? Am I your master?
What are you saying?
Don't make a face like that.
You!
If you say you're not feeling well...
If you say it's some kind of notice...
Nosebleed is useless water in your body.
Useless water?
Useless water.
When you take too much water, only what you take is nosebleed.
That's not true!
Why?
Why does nosebleed come out?
I don't know where that nosebleed comes from!
Nosebleed is actually sweat from your heart.
What?
I don't know what you're talking about!
Nosebleed is sweat from your heart!
It comes out when you hurt your heart.
Ouch!
I hurt my heart!
What is the biggest volume of television for?
Who is watching television with the biggest volume of television?
Just look!
As I said before, the volume of TV shows and commercials are different, aren't they?
Yes, they are.
If you watch a TV show on a kicker and it becomes a commercial, you'll be in big trouble.
I don't know either.
I don't want you to do that.
I really don't want you to do that.
If you think you can sell a product with that volume of TV, you're making a big mistake.
I know you don't like it, but you really want it.
I don't think you should do that.
If you make it smaller, you'll be more interested in it.
I've been doing a lot of TV shows, and when it suddenly becomes a commercial, I don't like it at all.
Can you make a movie with that volume of TV?
I can make a movie with that volume of TV, but I don't want to do it.
I think it's the opposite.
All commercials are opposite.
When you compare it with other companies' products, you can see that our products are often inferior.
It's the opposite, isn't it?
Is it?
Our products are not that good.
Are you kidding me?
I'm not kidding you.
Is it true?
No, it's not inferior at all.
It's not inferior at all.
It's the worst!
It's the worst product ever released!
It's quite expensive, isn't it?
By the way, this program will be offered to various companies, won't it?
Yes, it will.
Why don't you tell me about one of them?
You keep saying "somehow" and "somehow", but why don't you tell me about one of them?
One of them?
The one you're watching now.
Yes, the one you're watching now.
Ayan, why don't you tell me about it?
It's a conspiracy code.
What?
It's reflected in the screen, isn't it?
Look at it!
No, it's the same in the theater, isn't it?
What is it?
What? "Kouri no Bishou" is "Shinjuku Sukaraza" or something like that?
Ah! When it comes to adult movies...
Adult movies...
The first adult movie...
What about adult movies for children?
Yes, yes, yes...
Hare desu wa Zabara
That's not true!
It's not even a sponsor for a movie, but they pay for it!
Everyone is talking about it, why is it only there?
The companies that don't talk about it are usually...
"Yinbu Shokuhin" or something like that.
What is that?
There is no such company!
There is no such business there!
"Yinbu Shokuhin"...