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Unfortunate Story Grand Prix 2019
Tonight, as usual, Asuka judges the members' unfortunate stories.
First of all, Hayakawa Seira's "Unfortunate Story" of her fourth generation.
Well...
This is...
...my story when I was in the second grade of junior high school.
That's a scary story.
Your entrance is a scary story.
This is...
Your story when you were in the second grade of junior high school.
May I?
Yes.
I...
I broke my back.
You broke your back?
I failed to jump out of the box.
You failed to jump out of the box in the second grade of junior high school?
When I said "bang", I hit my butt.
Oh, you hit your butt without jumping out of the box.
I see.
Yes.
Where did you hit your butt?
My tailbone.
What?
Maybe I was a little slim at the time.
Oh, you didn't have butt meat?
Does that matter?
But you broke it.
That's right. I was sitting in class and it hurt all the time.
I told my dad to take me to the hospital, but it was my butt.
At first, I said, "Excuse me, can you give me your butt?"
At that point, I was very embarrassed.
I hate middle school the most.
I thought it was misfortune, and it broke.
Since then, my school life has been very bad.
What?
First of all, it hurt so much that I couldn't sit down, so I brought a donut-shaped cushion.
That's right. You can't treat it here.
I took it with me and put it on during class.
I also have a moving class.
My school teacher misunderstood me and thought I was an old man.
A donut-shaped donut.
It's not an old man at all, but it's a little small.
Is she an old man?
You're being teased.
I said, "No, I'm not."
It's hard to say that.
She misunderstood me and thought I was an old man.
That teacher is amazing.
Why did you say that?
At that point, I was very embarrassed.
During recess, I lined up my pet bottles and my most important cushion rolled over.
Why did you do that?
It's a donut-shaped cushion.
Why did you do that?
It's a little bad.
I feel sorry for you.
Who did it?
A classmate.
I know girls, but it's hard for me to say it to a boy.
Who did it?
It was a boy.
You liked it, didn't you?
Yes, I did.
You liked it.
I was teased.
Yes, I did.
I was thrown around and smelled bad.
Why did you smell bad?
Don't be a pervert.
It's his fault.
It's the worst.
It's the worst. It's embarrassing.
Yes.
Didn't you have a nickname?
Like "uncle"
"Uncle" with a shadow.
I'm being called "uncle" now.
What's with that class?
It's just like that.
Sleeping is painful and everything you do is painful.
I did classes on my back knee.
It was too painful.
Classes on your back knee?
Like this?
No.
Back knee is like this, isn't it?
No, it's like this.
Did you stand on your knees?
Yes, I did stand on my knees.
Did you do classes?
Yes, I did.
At that time, you took off your blanket, didn't you?
I did.
You idiot.
What's with him?
You don't have it anymore?
Oh, I still have it at home.
Do you have it at home?
I do have it at home.
Will you all go bowling next time?
I'll do it.
I'll do a bowling competition.
Asuka's fracture story.
What is Asuka's judgment?
It was pretty unfortunate, wasn't it?
When you were a student.
Yes, and it was funny.
Do you have a nickname called "uncle"?
My nickname is "uncle".
It's unfortunate, isn't it?
It's good.
You can laugh and cry.
Moreover, Hayakawa-sensei...
Hayakawa-sensei...
I watch a lot of times when you're dancing on TV.
It's so intense that you've never seen it before.
It's really "dosodoso".
I'll look forward to it in the future, too.
You're hosting a lot of events.
It's really intensive.
He was making weird movements.
Oh, I see it!
I think you have another fracture, don't you?
You do.
Oh, you're tall, so you're good at Poké Ball.
When I was in sixth grade, I was still small.
I was playing soccer in a basketball tournament.
I was playing as a boy.
There was only one girl who was good at playing soccer in a club.
I became one with her.
I chased her desperately.
I thought I would definitely take her.
That's amazing.
I was chasing her.
She was about 50 centimeters below me.
She kicked the ball in front of me.
What is she doing?
The ball seemed to come out of the line.
I see.
Then she struck me with her left thumb.
I thought I took it.
But I endured it.
The game was over and I was sweating.
I went to my best friend and said, "I want it, too."
She grabbed my swollen thumb and said, "It's okay."
"What's wrong with you?" "It's okay."
"Why are you doing that?" "That's right."
So I went to the hospital,
and there were two joints broken here.
What? That's broken.
That close friend of yours is probably broken in one place.
"That's broken." "That's right."
"In one place." "Yeah."
What was that?
Your way of speaking was really scary, too.
"Which one was better?" "Isn't this better?"
The one with the high line earlier was funny, too,
"but if it was that one..." "That one said a little more."
"Did it say a little more?" "Yeah."
You were laughing so hard just now.
"What's up with that friend of yours?" "What's up with her?"
"Did you try to fix it for me?" "No, I didn't."
"You're stupid." "No, I didn't."
What's up with you? You want me to fix it for you?
This program is brought to you by the following sponsors.
Mito Makida Land.
"Where did you get it?" "Isn't it out there?"
I got it.
What are you talking about?
Next is...
The Unhappiness Story of Four Seasons Autumn Far Away.
- I think it's common... - Common?
When I was in middle school, I used to ride a silver bike on a field road.
It's a little different from "common".
- What is "silver bike"? - Silver?
Well, well, well... I used to ride a bike and a silver bike...
- I know if it's a horse bike. - A silver bike?
- It's a silver bike. - What do you mean?
It's like a silver bike on the highway.
- Oh, it's written as "silver bike". - Oh, only silver is allowed.
I see.
- And... - You can't ride in red or black?
- All of them are silver. - Wow!
And it's light, this silver bike.
- A silver bike is light? - It's light.
- Is it made of aluminum foil? - It's easy to move.
- A silver bike? - It's easy to move...
and it's easy to ride on a field road.
A field road is not common...
- Well, you can ride on a field road... - Yes.
- There were three of us in middle school. - Everyone was riding a silver bike.
We were riding in a line on a silver bike.
A kid in front of me suddenly stopped...
and screamed.
- I thought, "Am I attacked by a swarm of insects again?" - Wait a minute.
- It's like "Nausicaa's World". - It's amazing.
- What's wrong? - It's not like that!
- No, it's like a small swarm of insects. - Oh, that one!
- The one with a lot of flies? - Yes, yes.
- Oh, it's like a swarm of dogs. - They're always around your face height.
- I thought, "Am I attacked by a swarm of insects again?" - Yes.
- and I thought of going to help them. - Yes.
- So, I was about to get off my bike... - Yes.
- and I saw a field road... - A field road...
- What do you mean by "field road"? - There are fields...
- Yes.
- and there's a big pond... - Yes, there's a pond!
- There's a pond... - Yes, there's a pond...
- and you go up on it. - Yes, yes.
- It's like a wind road. - Yes, yes.
- Is it dirt? - It's dirt.
- Yes, yes. - Yes, yes.
- I see. - Yes, yes.
- It's not common. - Yes, yes.
- Yes. - Yes.
- My legs were upside down and I couldn't reach it. - Yes.
- You went like this because of the slope... - I went like this...
- and you ended up like this. - I went like this...
- and my bike and my head fell into the pond. - Into the pond!
- My head fell into the pond... - Yes.
- and all of my uniform and bike fell into the pond. - Wow!
- I was quite big, so I got stuck... - Yes.
- and my whole body was covered in mud. - Yes.
- The next day, I didn't have my uniform on... - Yes.
- so I went to school alone in my gym clothes... - Yes.
- and everyone made fun of me. - Wow!
- If you are from the countryside, you may have quite a lot of experience. - Yes.
- Usually, when I go to the rice field in the morning, someone may have fallen into the rice field. - Wow!
- Is it so common? - Well... - That's terrible!
- Don't you bump into a girl when the fertilizer is solidified? - Yes.
- I bumped into her, too. - I bumped into a poop.
- I don't like that. - What happened to your bone fracture?
- It fell cleanly from my head, but it was unscathed. - Oh!
- It was protected by Dahedoro. - It was protected! That's good!
- That's good. - Yes.
- It's over, right? - Yes. - I see.
- The judge seems a little bored.
- I wanted a bone fracture or a blood flow examination here. - I see.
- I thought there was something to it, but it's pretty unfortunate. - Yes, it is.
- It happens every day. - Every day?
- It happens every day. - Be careful! What are you doing every day?
- It fell again. - It's not every day.
- But it happens unexpectedly.
- Well... - Oh!
- It's not unfortunate at all. - It's not stuck in my head.
- Oh, my God! You look like you're bored. - Oh!
- Are you actually happy? - Because it's unscathed.
- Oh! - Oh!
- It's protected by nature. - Oh!
- I see! - I wanted to be born in such a rich land.
- Oh! - Is that so?
- The judge is a little strict. - No, I'm not!
- Are you actually happy? - No, I'm not!
Next, what is Terada's unfortunate story?
- Terada is also unhappy. - You're really unhappy now, aren't you?
- I think you're in trouble. - I'm already in trouble.
- No, my name is unhappy. - Your name is unhappy?
- Really? - That's good. - Don't you think so?
But when I introduce myself to people I meet for the first time,
Huh? Can you say it again?
- They'll definitely ask me, "What?" - Because you're not used to it.
I've been living for 20 years now,
but every time I meet people for the first time,
I'm asked to say it over and over again, so I feel like it's a waste of time in life.
And when I was in kindergarten,
everyone had a toolbox or a school supplies ready for me in kindergarten.
But I didn't have my own toolbox.
So I thought, "Why don't I have one?"
"Because you're always so shy," my mom suddenly said.
Maybe you thought I was a boy.
- "Maybe I can be a boy, too." - "Yeah, it's subtle."
So I went to the boys' area,
and there was a toolbox with a yacht sticker on it.
- Boys like boys. - They all have cute flowers or jewels on it,
- but it was really damaging. - It's like kindergarten's first time.
It was really bad from the first time.
And for my birthday cake...
- Your name? - Yeah, my name. "Happy Birthday, Ranze."
I got it wrong every year.
That's why you went to the store and checked the plates.
- I tried to write it down. - How did you get it wrong?
- "Ranse-chan," "Ranyo-chan" - "Ranse."
And "Danze-chan" at the end.
- "Danze-chan"? - "Danze"?
- "Danze-chan"? - You can only hear "Ranse" now.
- What did you do just now? - "Da"? - "Da"? - "Da"?
- I have a picture of it. I think it's when I was in elementary school. - Oh, I see.
- You're so cute! - I'm from Swinepare. - You're so cute. How old are you?
- I was so mad that I couldn't even take a picture of it. - You look like you don't like it.
- This is probably "Danze-chan" and "Ultimate Time". It was every year, and it finally exploded. - You don't like it anymore, do you?
- That's why I'm preparing for it every year, but I still think it's a job that makes people happy by making cakes.
- What's up with you guys? - But you look cool when you grow up.
- But when I joined Nogizaka, I was still in voice training before my debut.
- I think you're probably the same as a first-year student.
- Before I sang, I introduced myself one by one.
- "I'm Serada Ranze. Nice to meet you." I said, "Yes, first of all, I can't hear your name."
- "I'm Rongai." "Impossible." That's how it started.
- Before I sang, I got mad at me for my name.
- My teacher may have met such a person for the first time, but I myself had been repeating it for about 14 years.
- I was very angry.
- Everyone's stories were also very unhappy, but even if I still go to the hospital with a weak wound in my heart for the rest of my life,
- "Oh, what is it?" "What's with that attitude?" "What's up with you?"
- You're very angry.
- I'm angry.
- You're very angry.
- I see.
- But speaking of names...
- Um... Ms. Takayama?
- I feel bad for you.
- There it is!
- There are various things about Ranze.
- But Serada Ranze itself has a very good name.
- Wow!
- It's very good!
- It's very, very good!
- It's a good name.
- It's really good.
- But there are many good and different names.
- First of all, a good name for you, Serada Jewel.
- Jewel?
- Jewel.
- Also, Serada Doremi.
- Doremi?
- Doremi is congested.
- Doremi is like that.
- Also, Serada Sonoyo.
- Sonoyo?
- It's close to Ranze.
- That's right. If you look at it from a distance...
- It's close.
- The kanji is...
- Why? Why do you look at it from a distance?
- It's easier to convey on the phone.
- Sonoyo.
- What's the last one?
- Also, Terada Sansan.
- No, Terada Sansan is...
- San!
- In hiragana...
- San!
- San is also very good.
- Which one?
- Which one is good?
- There's more?
- It's called Teradaokaeru.
- Teradaokaeru!
- It's hard to understand Ranze.
- That's right.
- Ah, but if you change it, it's easier to read.
- It's like a sutra.
- That's amazing!
- Ranze Ranze.
- Ranze Ranze!
- Ranze Ranze is good!
- Also, Nobuta Ranze.
- Nobuta Ranze!
- Do you use "buta" to avoid it?
- That's right.
- Also, Minegaito Ranze.
- I can't remember that name!
- Is it "yokozuna" or is it a Japanese name?
- Minegaito Ranze!
- Also, the last one is cool.
- Nitomakida Ranze.
- I can't remember!
- Is there such a name?
- Did you make this, Takayama?
- No!
- What is it?
- You can find it on the website I trust.
- It's on the website?
- "Nitomakida"? - It's coming up.
- Ferrada... - Yes?
- What do you think? There's a lot of stuff out there. - What do you think?
- Is it an extermination method? "Nitomakida"? - "Nitomakida"?
I think "Nitomakida" is more realistic.
- "Nitomakida"? - No! No!
- It's neither realistic nor not realistic. - No! No!
- Then, can you introduce yourself? - Sure.
- Yes, I'm Nogizaka46's "Nitomakida" Ranze. Thank you for having me. - Yes, please.
- "Nitomakida" - "Hey, "Nitomakida", what's up with you?"
- That's right. - "Nitomakida"
- At first, you don't know what it is, but once you know it, you want to call it out. - That's right.
- But, really, it's okay to hide it, right? It's okay to hide it from the beginning.
- Then, you don't need to change it? - Actually, that's right. This time, it's like that.
- What was it at this hour? - "Nitomakida"
- With that said, Ferrada's points were "laughable" and "rather happy".
- "Nitomakida" - After this, a shocking unfortunate story of Oshima!
After this, a sad story of Oshima!
- Is it the last one? - It's the last one!
- Oshima! - Yes?
- What's wrong? - What's wrong?
- It's the last one, right? - It's the last one.
I don't have confidence.
- She's cute. - What do you mean? It's not such an unfortunate story.
- But it's my unfortunate story. - Yes, yes.
- It doesn't matter. - It doesn't matter.
- The judge will evaluate it. - That's right.
- It's a recent story. - Recently?
- The other day, we went to a haunted house for "Ghost Project". - Yes, we did.
Before we went to the haunted house, we paid for it.
We went to the haunted house and there was nothing special.
We slept soundly that day.
- The next day, we were worried about going to pay for it. - After it was over?
- The next day. - Oh.
- I had work in the morning. - Oh.
- I didn't go to pay for it. - Oh.
- What's this? - What's this?
- Something happened.
- I didn't go to pay for it. - Oh.
- Then, the next day... - Oh.
- I couldn't stop sneezing and sneezing. - Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God!
- What's this? - Oh, my God!
- Is it Reinos' trick? - Oh, my God!
- What's this? - Oh, my God!
- This is a good thing. - Oh, my God!
- I didn't know it. - I sneezed...
- What? - I sneezed and...
- What? - What's this?
- I sneezed and... - I couldn't stop sneezing.
- I woke up in the middle of the night and I had a bad feeling. - Oh.
- Then, I couldn't stop sneezing and sneezing. - Oh.
- Then, it lasted for a week. - Oh.
- In the meantime, I had a bad sleep. - A bad sleep?
- There is an app, isn't it? - Oh.
- You can listen to it. - Oh, I know it.
- You can listen to it. - It's about 60 seconds, isn't it?
- What did you say? - I was angry.
- I was like, "What's wrong with you?" - Oh.
- Then...
- I got a little angry. - Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God!
- What are you talking about? - Oh, my God!
- I got a little angry. - Oh, my God!
- Then, I stopped sneezing. - Oh.
- Then, you didn't go to pay the bill? - I didn't go.
- You still have a little nasal voice, don't you? - No.
- Yesterday, I took two boxes of medicine. - Wait a minute.
- Did you get better with the medicine? - Oh, my God!
- Did you get better with the medicine? - No, I didn't.
- I may not have recovered. - Oh, my God!
- Did you get worse with the medicine? - Yes, I did.
- I couldn't get up in the morning. - Oh, my God!
- Couldn't you get up in the morning? - Yes, I couldn't.
- I kept chewing my nose for two hours. - Didn't you catch a cold?
- It was cold at the location, wasn't it? - Yes, it was.
- Wasn't it raining? - Yes, it was.
- It rained a lot. - Yes.
- I was able to sleep when I came back. - But you didn't catch a cold.
- What did you say? Did you catch a cold? - I may have caught a cold.
- Why? - Were you okay with the members who made fun of you?
- How about you, Kaze? - I didn't catch a cold.
- How about you, everyone? - Did you make fun of them?
- I didn't make fun of them. - You didn't.
- I got salt. - Oh.
- Minami ate it with boiled egg. - I ate it with boiled egg.
Thank you.
I got a lot of salt and vinegar in the bath.
I went home and asked them to do it for me later.
But I didn't trust them.
- The salt... It was salt. - Yes.
- What did you do with the salt? - I put it next to the TV.
- You put it there. - I had salt at home.
But I didn't want to use it up, so I put it there.
- Did you use it up? - Did you use it up?
You didn't use it up with boiled egg.
- You didn't believe it? - I didn't believe it.
Some people may not believe it.
But you didn't use it up, so you must have had a runny nose.
- It's a beautiful story. - You didn't wake up in the morning.
I had a runny nose and couldn't sleep in the middle of the night.
I couldn't wake up in the morning.
I couldn't sleep in my bed.
I had a scary dream.
You had a runny nose and couldn't wake up in the middle of the night.
- That's right. - That's right?
What a story!
- I've never heard of it. - I was surprised.
- I had a runny nose. - Really?
- But you got better. - I got better.
But I had a runny nose and couldn't sleep in the middle of the night.
You look tired and sick.
But there was also a ghost in the hotel.
There was a different ghost, but it came to give you runny nose again.
- Maybe it's attached to the ghost of Vienna. - Is there a ghost of Vienna?
She said "ghost of Vienna" earlier.
It only comes to give you runny nose.
- It's a runny nose ghost. - What is it?
- Is it the last one? - Asuka is laughing.
What is Asuka's verdict of Koshino's "new sensation" story?
There's no doubt about it.
That's awesome!
She's the best when she's a guest. She can laugh in misfortune.
I've never heard of "beauty and the beast" before.
She's too cute.
I see.
It was good.
Even though it was an earthquake, it was the best.
I was stuck in Asuka's pot.
I see.
So, all the misfortune stories that have been entered are over.
This time, the Grand Prix and the best prize will be given by Asuka.
The first best prize is Hayakawa's "beauty and the beast".
Then, Hayakawa will announce the best prize.
I think it's a famous prize.
Is it?
Is it a famous prize?
Yes, it is.
Let me show you.
Ta-da!
Wow, it's here!
It's here!
Do you know what it is?
It's creepy.
Do you know what it is?
I don't know.
You don't know?
It's a famous prize.
So, Hayakawa will receive Asuka Saito's clay work as a present.
Is the foundation gone?
I don't know where the foundation is.
It's disappearing little by little.
The winner of "misfortune stories and the Grand Prix" is...
The first place goes to Minami.
Congratulations!
I've been waiting for you.
"Misfortune stories and the Grand Prix" goes to...
The first place goes to...
Ta-da!
What's this?
It's a flower with bread.
A flower with bread?
There's bread in it.
What's that?
There's bread in the flower.
It says "there's bread in it".
A flower with bread?
Your spirit is a little...
What's this, Asuka?
This is a picture of a flower with bread I drew when I was in elementary school.
What's "a flower with bread"?
It's been proven that the clay I made earlier has the effect of making people happy.
This is also a flower with bread I drew when I was in elementary school.
It's quite...
If you decorate it like this, you'll probably sleep well.
I see.
Your nose water will stop, too.
But it looks like it'll stop.
I like bread, too.
You like bread, don't you?
I'm always happy.
You look happy.
I put it somewhere.
That's good.
You put it in your heart.
Yes, I have a good dream.
Yes, have a good dream.
It's one step ahead of Shingo Yamagisawa's "good morning".
This program was brought to you by the following sponsors.
There were quite a few other people.
There are many young people with a future.
Young people...
Are you looking forward to it?
The 24th single.
A coupling song recorded in "don't have to say goodbye".
"do my best" doesn't mean anything.
"To you in the library".