AISubs
ARIYOSHI AKB iPhone App
This week's new product is a delusional phone call from Rie Kitahara
Hello, I heard you caught a cold
Why didn't you tell me?
Kojima Haruna Daisuki Matsuri!
We are very excited, but this time we will have all the comedians that Kojiharu likes and doesn't like!
I think everyone is waiting for it, but let's call everyone's idol, Kojima Haruna!
Ariyoshi-san, let's do it together!
Nyan Nyan!
Thank you for taking the time to calm down.
Kojima-san, how do you feel?
There are so many people gathered here.
I'm very happy.
First of all, I'd like to tell you how much we love Kojima-san.
Are you ready?
Kojima-san's date of birth is...
April 19th, 1988!
Thank you so much!
I think it's quite difficult to weigh when you're tired, but here we go.
One, two...
About 3,000 grams!
I'm so embarrassed.
I think it's going to be difficult at the end.
I'm going to imitate Kojima-san.
Can you guess what Kojima-san is doing?
I think this is going to be difficult.
Good morning.
What is it?
Let's go
1,2,3
GAKUYA IIZU no KOTOJI WA HABASA
Yay!
Thank you very much!
How was it, Kojima-san? Did you feel our love?
It was amazing!
Amazing!
I've never seen anyone say that they like Kojima Haruno in the entertainment world.
I don't get told that much.
You're just a fan.
Yeah, I'm just a fan.
You're just a fan.
I'm just a fan.
I don't get told that much.
I didn't know that. I'm really happy.
This time, we would like to show you a story about Kojima-san that Kojima-san loves.
Of course, Kojima-san will be the judge of the story.
The point of the judge is how much you can feel Kojima- san's love.
And the person Kojima-san chose first will receive a wonderful reward from Kojima-san.
What is it?
I'm looking forward to it after you show us the story
How do you feel about it?
Let's ask one by one
Yes
What is it?
Let's hear it
Shall we go in order?
From the beginning
He is more energetic than Zaman Zai
How about next?
To tell Kojima how much I like him
I made it in 3 days
I will go today
Next
I'm so excited that I can die today
Really?
That's scary
That's how much I'm excited
Next
I want to bring out Kojima's good points and add a lot of comedy elements
The only thing I want from you guys is to film this in Japan
If that's the case, we should take a break.
That's right.
We should take a break.
That's why we have such a hard time.
I see.
Let's talk for a long time.
That's right.
This is tough.
To convey my love for Kojima-san.
If Kojima-san chooses me, I don't mind quitting the entertainment world.
I'll do it!
Next.
Isn't that the theme of the show?
Do you know the name of the show?
Next, next.
Well, Kojima-san is the theme of the show.
Well, if you want to express your love, you don't have to be funny.
Next.
Next, next.
Please, please, please.
Please give me an interesting phrase.
Can I have about 15 minutes?
You can do it in no time
Hello! I'm Kojiharu's favorite comedian!
I'm here today!
Why did you break your heart?
I felt like I was breaking my own heart during the recording.
Can I make a decision?
I'll summarize all the lines and comments.
I'll be in front of you.
Everyone's feelings are one.
We made a story for Kojima's love.
We worked hard to make it.
As comedians, this is one of our greetings.
We made it in that sense.
Please take a look.
This is Machine Guns.
Please look forward to it.
This is difficult. This is really difficult.
Please look forward to it.
You're the only one who can do this!
I can't do this alone!
Why are you standing up?
Kojima-san, how was it so far?
I was so nervous!
The only one who can do this is Kojima-san!
My heart is pounding.
I'm getting nervous.
I'm counting on you, Nakamura.
Let's see the story.
The top batter is Mashingan-san.
Please look forward to it!
Double Tsukkomi Manzai Machine Guns
Tsukkonde Tsukkonde Tsukkonde
I'll shoot through Kojima's heart
We love you Kojima Haruna chan!
We love you!
We love you so much that we searched the internet
There are many people who love Kojima Haruna chan more than we do
That's amazing
We brought it with us
Read it for us
It's all real
This is amazing
Excuse me, I want to marry Hanra Kojima, but what should I do?
I'm the same age as her, we have the same birthday, we have the same blood type, and we have the same birth place.
I definitely want to marry her.
That's scary!
You idiot!
I don't think we can get married just because we're all the same.
There's a lot.
The answer is amazing.
The answer is, first become a writer, then become a commentator,
co-star in the same show, and talk to each other. That's the reality.
That's ridiculous!
You idiot!
It's not realistic to be a commentator.
You're right.
You're right!
It's coming up!
It's amazing that you like it so much.
Question! I want Kojima Haruna-chan's breath.
What should I do?
That's gross!
What are you talking about?
What kind of breath do you use?
The answer is also amazing.
Answer! It's the fastest way to collect air at a handshake.
Did I do it?
You idiot!
How do you collect it?
It's true.
There's another similar one.
Question! How much is Kojima Haruna-chan's breath?
You're not selling it!
Don't talk about selling it, you idiot!
Answer! It depends on the quality.
If it's 500ml with high purity, it must be expensive, but if it contains other impurities, the price will go down.
In general, 300ml is 2,000 yen.
Can you sell it?
I've seen it once.
Question! I want Kojima Haruna to strangle me like a dog.
Ask the question!
Ask the question, you idiot!
Answer! I am the dog.
There is no answer!
What kind of situation is this?
What are you talking about, you idiot?
This is amazing.
Question! If Kojima Haruna officially announces his graduation, what will happen to Ariyoshi AKB48's board meeting?
I wonder what will happen.
Answer! I think Matsuko Deluxe, who has a good relationship with Ariyoshi, will do it.
Are you already doing it?
This is a live broadcast, you idiot!
This is amazing too.
Question. Does Kojima Haruna poop?
What are you asking?
Answer. He poops everyday.
Did you see it?
Don't say you saw it.
What's wrong with you?
Question. What kind of face does Kojima Haruna have when he poops?
Do you want to know?
Do you want to know this?
Answer. I think he poops.
Did you see it?
Don't say you saw it.
This is amazing too.
Excuse me. I'm a fan of AKB48.
I chose Kojima Haruna.
It's a tour of my soul.
It's a crime that I've committed in history.
My face follows the law of God.
My voice is also fluffy.
Kojima Haru, I love you the most in the world.
That's the God's song.
It's disgusting.
I want money.
Thank you very much.
It was a scene where we could see Kojima-san's popularity.
It was a very tense scene.
I didn't think it would be this tense.
The paper I was holding was shaking.
At the rehearsal, everyone laughed a little more.
What is this?
Kojima-san.
Takizawa-san is...
very flirty with Ariyoshi-san.
That's scary!
It's just Kojima-san.
By the way, Nishihori-san...
is married.
Is there a guarantor for that?
Yes.
When I got married,
Ariyoshi-san became my guarantor.
It has nothing to do with you now, right?
I told you it has nothing to do with me!
You answer me when I ask you!
I don't know what you're talking about!
Why me?
Why don't you answer me?
That's right!
It's not sorry!
How was it, Ariyoshi-san?
It's all real, right?
It's all written in real, right?
Can you show me your face when you're pooping?
I don't know.
I'll show you.
I'm not telling you to do it.
Just your face.
Your head is weird.
Thank you, Masayuki-san.
Next is Fuutou Matsumara's love letter to Kojima.
Thank you Fuutou Matsumara.
Mr. Haruna Kojima is so cute. We love him too.
That's right.
There's a part where you don't like him because he's too good.
That's right.
The guidebook I bought for my trip to Korea was from Hong Kong.
That's right.
Before you buy a guidebook, you should first buy a world map and a kanji drill.
We need a Kojima Haruna guidebook.
That's why we have to buy a photo book that will be released in March.
In the main character drama, he takes off his skirt and takes off his pants.
I don't like it.
Even in the commercial, he walks around in his underwear.
This is a complete exposure.
It's too much.
He doesn't know how to sing or dance, but he can do it.
I don't like it.
He has the lowest rating in the past, 0.1%.
I can't do it.
His ranking is 6th, 7th, 6th, 7th, 9th, 8th.
It's a little tilted.
At the culture festival, he was a juice seller for 3 years in a row.
That's true.
He must have been selling thin juices.
That's right.
Just like the ratings, it was about 0.2% fruit juice.
He's good.
When the member, Oya Shizuka, was about to get fired, he persuaded the staff and got fired.
Among the fans, he got disqualified.
When the member Oya Shizuka was about to get fired, she convinced the staff and saved him.
That's good.
But actually, when Mariko Shinoda was trying to convince her, she just said,
Nyan Nyan, you think so too, right?
She just said, yes.
I don't like it.
What's with that attitude?
The reason is that she was wearing a pink top.
I don't really know the reason.
But her nipples are pink, so she must like pink.
She's coordinating.
It's about time.
I don't like it.
Thank you very much.
Thank you so much!
How was it, Kojihara-san?
I'm so happy that there's so much information
I want to send it to my parents
I'm sure they made it for you
That's why I'm so excited
Next is a gentle rain. For some reason, Matsuzaki, who has no interest in women, sings Kojima a love song.
I've heard that you all like Kojima Haruna, but Kojima Haruna likes me.
Kojima Haruna has been influenced by me a lot. I made a song about it.
It seems that Haruna Kojima is wearing a fluffy room coat at home
Do you remember my fluffy hair?
It used to be a face mask, but now it seems that the face doesn't matter
Nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan!
Okay!
It always helps me when I say it.
Omae wa ore ga suki
Dakedo ore wa Yoshimoto ga suki
Gomen ne omae no koto suki
But that's not love, it's like
Thank you very much.
It was such a lovely story that everyone in front of the TV was jealous.
I want to confirm one thing.
Kojiharu-san, you like Matsuzaki-san, right?
That's right.
I want to confirm one thing. Kojiharu-san, you like Matsuzaki-san, right?
I didn't think so, but when I heard the song, I thought it might be so.
That's right! That's right!
It's a two-dimensional woman, so I can't give her much love.
Well, well, well, I'm sorry.
I can't give her much love.
How can I make you like me?
I've been asked by Toriharu-san.
I have no choice but to become an anime character.
What about your face?
My face...
My face isn't like that.
No way!
Even though my face isn't like that, I think it's a good thing that I like you this much.
I'll do my best.
Please do your best.
I'll be waiting.
How was it, Ario-san?
No, no, I had a lot of voice.
That's not it!
It's not your first time laughing!
Next week, Haruna Kojima will finally reveal her Marshmallow Body!
After the commercial, AKB48's new single, Yukito Kashiwagi and Haruna Kojima will decorate the center.
AKB48 was formed in 2005
10th Anniversary Year 2015 New Single
Kashiwagi Yuki is going to talk about the future.
And, by our peace-making MC, Haruna Kojima...
Double Sensor!
It will be released on March 2nd.
The title is...
Green Flash!
Rather than crying alone in the corner
Cry in the crowd
Blurring town, overflowing tears
Fantasy is kind to you
I should have known that I was close to you when we parted
But why is it so hard? I guess I really liked you
I can't accept this love, don't feel no
Even if I'm strong, my heart is full of you
I love you with my own voice
Even if I want to tell you, I'll suddenly become strong
Before the dusk turns into night
Let's leave the sadness of today
It's okay to stay a little longer
Tomorrow is a good thing