AISubs v3.5
Anshasshi Kojima teaches a skit to AKB48, who is defeated by Drunk Dragon Suzuki.
The second skit is "Sword Master Skit".
Do you know it?
Yes, I know it!
You know it? Tell me.
You hold two swords and hit like this, right?
No.
What? Is it wrong?
I'll explain it.
"Sword Master".
It's not wrong, but I can't explain it at all.
Everyone, "Sword Master Skit".
Takashi, bring me a whiteboard.
What?
What's wrong with you?
It's annoying.
It's far.
I'll bring it.
It's far.
It's not far. It's close.
It's far.
Hurry up. I'll do it quickly.
Do you have a tire on you?
I don't think so.
Don't be lazy.
Where is it taking you so long?
Yes.
Take a deep breath.
Extend your arms.
It's not something you should clap for.
I'll explain it.
First of all, the characters are...
It's hard to say their names.
They are a swordsman and a disciple.
You got it, right?
The disciple says to the master, "It's about time for me to train the sword."
But the master says, "If you take one from me, I'll train you."
So the disciple goes to get one.
But the swordsman uses the lid of the pot to exchange it.
But there is a point to this.
There is a point.
When the disciple says, "Here you are," the master says, "Here you are," and makes you buy it.
This structure is gradually revealed and becomes a joke.
Do you understand?
Yes, I do.
Your face is dead.
It's shining.
It's not scary.
Wait a minute.
Why are you buying it?
Wait a minute!
Wait a minute.
Return it.
Why are you buying it?
Did I do something wrong?
No, you didn't.
Return it.
Protect your position.
Don't go home and listen to me.
Okay.
It's okay if it's roughly.
Is it okay?
Yes.
Is there anyone who has a question?
Does lemon come out of this pot?
It doesn't come out.
Lemon doesn't come out of most pots.
Can I pour it out?
You can't.
It's a swordsman's pot. Lemon has nothing to do with it.
Do you understand?
I'll do it.
(AKB48 Kans)
This is it.
What?
You're going to blow away any worries?
I don't see that kind of money at all!
No, it seems that if you talk a little bit, you can solve any worries immediately.
Really? I'm seriously worried about it.
I'm serious about it.
Can you do it? Can you do it? Can you do it?
I can do it.
Let's go and see.
Yes.
Excuse me.
I'd like you to listen to this girl's worries.
May I?
Excuse me. Nice to meet you.
I'm Takahashi Minami from AKB48.
Do you know me?
Ah, you don't know me!
You're a little late.
I see. I see.
First of all, I have to explain.
I'm the general director of AKB48.
The role of general director is to take care of the members and connect them with the staff.
I'm also in charge of being a big MC in the live show.
I think it's a pretty important position.
But as AKB48 general director, I think I have to lead everyone.
But I don't think I've been following you lately.
I think so.
Sometimes you're too strict.
But in order to live in a strict world like AKB, you have to work hard as a senior.
I've been told I'm a big help.
But I want to survive with everyone.
I think it's a word that comes out because I have such a passionate feeling.
Well, I'll be honest with you.
Am I not suitable for general director?
First of all, I think it's strange for a member to be a general director.
What do you think about that?
Looks like we won.
Let's go.
Let's go, let's go.
What should we do?
You talk a lot, Irio.
That's not it!
Hey!
No, no, no.
You said you were desperate and talked a lot.
That's not nice of you.
I'm working hard.
But I'm going home.
Isn't this weird?
No, wait, wait.
Huh?
Are you giving it to me?
Seriously?
It's 50,000 yen.
That's not it!
It's expensive!
I don't want it!
Wait, this is...
It's too early for me to call Akimo-san.
Ahhhh!
Anjashi Kojima teaches AKB48's chaos to AKB48's Suzuki.
The point is...
You're warriors.
This is important.
Do you understand?
It's important to be warriors before you fight.
First, Takashi!
Yes.
Are you ready?
Yes! Let's do it!
It's okay, it's okay.
It's okay, right?
Let's do it first.
Are you ready?
Then...
Staff members...
Please!
Good evening!
Three, two...
Master!
What is it?
I have a favor to ask of you.
What is it?
Let me train my sword too!
Training your sword?
Training your sword is ten years...
No, it's twenty years too early!
Well, I'll be back.
Don't give up!
You're going to end up like this!
Why are you giving up?
Who are you?
Why are you clapping?
No, it's because...
It tastes like kinshima.
Kojimana?
Who...
Who told you to give up?
Are you really giving up?
You're forgetting that you're Kojima.
You're not Kirishima or Samejima.
You really look like you've forgotten. You're Kojima!
I'm Kojima-san!
What's wrong with you?
You're Kojima-san. You really shouldn't push her.
Next up is Sato.
Yes, I'm sorry.
You're really sorry, aren't you?
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
Okay, Sato-san.
Next up is Taruga.
Please!
Three, two...
Master!
Yes, Sensei?
I have a request.
What is it?
Please let me train my sword as well.
Train your sword?
Yes.
It's ten years... no, twenty years too early for you to train your sword.
Please do something about it!
If you keep cleaning up the dojo like this, you'll only get older!
I understand.
Instead, I have a condition.
Condition?
If you can take one sword from me, I'll teach you how to train your sword.
If you like me, come at me anytime.
Understood.
Yes!
I did it!
I told you earlier!
I did it!
I'm in trouble!
You're in trouble!
You don't say "I did it!"
I'm not someone who can do this kind of thing!
You have to say "I did it!" before you do it!
I did it!
Change!
Change! No, Abe!
I did it!
You don't say "I did it!"
I'll do my best!
Staff, please!
Good luck!
Three, two...
Master!
I have a request.
What is it?
Um...
Please let me train my sword, too.
Training your sword?
Yes.
Ten years for you...
No, twenty years is too early for you!
Um...
Somehow...
If you keep cleaning up like this, you'll only age.
I understand.
If you can take one sword from me, I'll teach you how to train your sword.
Yes!
If you like me, come at me anytime.
I'll do my best!
I did it!
Yes!
Oh my!
I said it a little earlier, but...
Ouch!
It's still ten years early for you.
What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing?
What are you doing? It's not decided yet.
I'm negotiating now, so don't come in now.
Is my turn not over yet?
It's not over yet, but I'm doing it now.
I'm not a bowler!
I'm not doing it!
I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it at all.
I'm not a bowler!
I'm not doing it at all. I'm not doing it!
Everyone, gather up!
I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it. It's over for me!
It's over for me!
I want to do it again!
It's over for you!
Can I go home now?
No, you can go home now.
I haven't settled down with this story yet...
Are you okay?
Please!
Yes!
Fall?
Please do something funny!
Something funny...
Again...
It's worse than Suzuki Chaku...
It's the worst!
I don't like it worse than Chaku!
Chaku is the worst, so I don't like it!
Once upon a time...
The earth invasion of Mokrom also ended in failure...
The two "Whip Saints"...
The second generation "Whip Saints" who received their will...
Once again, they raised the earth invasion to their goal...
However, they have one drawback...
That is...
They faint when the whip stops...
For that reason, they train day and night...
We are the second generation "Whip Saints"!
I will do my best not to be in front of my ancestors who fought for a worthless death!
I will do my best!
Today's topic is...
"It's an average size, Fura"!
Fura!
Go ahead, Fura!
I will do my best, Fura!
Wow! Amazing!
Amazing, Fura!
Wow!
I think I can do it!
Amazing, Fura!
Can I go all the way to the end?
Amazing, Fura!
Can I do it?
I think I can do it!
Wow!
OK.
Is it OK?
Wow!
Watch out! Watch out!
Wow!
Watch out! Watch out!
Ah! Ah! Ah!
Today's training is over.
At that moment...
She squeezed her last energy and stood up.
Can you do it one more time?
I'm going to die!
Until the day of earth invasion, do your best, space aliens!
I'm sorry!
Oh no, I forgot my cell phone and came back.
Hey you! Why are you looking at someone else's cell phone?!
Hey, sit over there.
Who's Minami?
Huh? My subordinate.
No way! You don't use your subordinate's heart mark!
That's the company's recent policy.
We all use heart marks now.
Heart is important for work!
I had fun yesterday.
He asked me to take him with me again.
Where did you go?
No, I went to a meeting.
It seems like he wants to study my job.
At an amusement park?
No, I went to a meeting at an amusement park. What's wrong with that?
My favorite thing at an amusement park is a roller coaster.
It makes me nervous and when I say nervous, I mean riding a Ferris wheel.
What's going on?!
Well, I'm sure it's a meeting on a roller coaster,
but meetings are a series of nervousnesses.
What about riding a Ferris wheel?
Well, I was in a meeting at a Ferris wheel and a mouse came and kissed me.
What kind of excuse is that?! You won't admit it even if I tell you?!
I won't admit it! It's true!
More than that, you shouldn't look at other people's phones without permission!
Don't change the subject! You're talking about cheating, aren't you?!
Even though you're my wife, I won't forgive you for looking at my phone without permission!
It's fine if you don't forgive me.
I'm divorced from you who are cheating!
I don't even want to see you anymore!
Divorce? The conversation isn't over yet!
Divorce is fine, isn't it?!
You said you wouldn't forgive me earlier, didn't you?!
It's over now!
I'm talking about you looking at my phone without permission!
It's fine, so let's divorce! It's over!
Aia!
See you!
What's going on?!
What?!
Huh?! What?!
What?!
W-what?
W-who...
W-who are you?
I've been listening to you two talking for a while now.
Actually, that cell phone is mine!
What?!
I went to my husband's company the other day and brought his cell phone by mistake.
You went to the company like that?
Actually, I love you from head to toe.
Therefore, it is up to you to send me an email like that.
But... my husband gave me a lot of things.
That's because you protected me.
Your cell phone is...
this one!
Y-you! Give me a break!
You're causing a big problem!
I'm sorry!
You're confusing me!
If you hadn't made a mistake, this wouldn't have happened!
It's really... sad...
I sincerely...
I sincerely think...
That's right!
Therefore, I...
I humbly ask for your mercy.
Huh?
Bringing your husband's cell phone without permission...
is like making up for your death!
Why, why did you bring your cell phone without permission?
All of you!
I sincerely apologize!
And now...
The next line.
I now think...
Why did you make a mistake with your cell phone?
As of now...
After the festival!
And with that... I'm sorry!
Wait a minute!
It's me!
That cell phone...
It's mine!
I lied.
I was cheating with Minami.
It's me.
This person...
Covering for me like this...
That's why... That's why...
Please don't curse me!
Please!
I'm sorry for lying.
From now on, I won't cheat with you again.
That's why... That's why I'm divorcing you!
From now on, I'll make it up to you for the rest of my life.
That's why, don't leave me!
I understand.
I'm sorry for asking you on my own.
You...
Promise me you won't do something like this again.
Yes! I won't do it again!
It seems like my life...
Has been saved by you, who is honest!
I'm sorry.
It's nothing.
It seems like you've settled down.
Will you go back?
Wait a minute!
You covered for us until we wrote our deaths.
Are you going back like that?
At least... At least tell me your name!
I...
Don't hate people by covering for sins...
I am...
Kaburouta!
Kaburouta...
With that said...
It...
Has been settled!
Thank you... Mr. Tsumikaburouta...
So this is what my house used to look like...
My beloved superstar legend! "Guess Who's Doing What?" Quiz!
Good evening! I'm Kuromochi Asuka!
I'm about to do a move of a superstar!
Guess who's doing what!
The hint is that I love pro-wrestling!
Let's do it!
Let's do it again!
Did you get it?
The answer is...
After a normal kick...
You rotate your body...
And do a rolling kick that increases your centrifugal force!
I'm Kobass Kenta!
Did you get it?
Bye-bye!
I see.
She ran away with Mr. Umeda's bag.
That's right.
In an instant,
when I realized it, he was gone.
But you remember his face, don't you?
Yes.
It's etched in my memory.
Well, I'll create a montage of the criminal,
so please tell me in detail about his face.
I see.
First of all, please tell me about his outline.
Okay.
Let me see...
It's like a reverse triangle knot.
A reverse triangle knot...
Is it right?
It's okay.
Then...
What about his hair?
His hair...
It was growing only in the left half.
Only in the left half...
Is it right?
Yes.
It's right.
Then, his eyes?
His left eye was upward.
His right eye was downward.
What do you mean?
I mean...
His left eye was upward.
His right eye was downward.
No, no...
Isn't it strange?
His right eye and his hair are only in the left eye,
and his eyes are upward.
He's not human!
Isn't it strange?
Then, please tell me about his skin color.
It was two colors.
Huh?
Two colors?
From his face to his neck,
half of it is red,
and the other half is white...
Is it divided in half?
There's no such person!
It's true.
His face...
His face is definitely not good.
Hmm...
If you include all of it now, it will look like this.
What?!
This is Picasso!
Tano-san, your drawing is too bad!
No, it's not like that!
It's definitely this kind of person!
What?!
You're kidding me!
It's not like that!
No, it's definitely this kind of person!
Wow!
Hello, hello, mama?
Hmm? What's wrong?
Huh? I don't know about that.
Where do you sell it?
Often?
Huh? I don't know about that.
Wow!
It's that person!
What?!
You're under arrest for theft!
How did you know?!
What?!
It was the same as the picture.
[A few days later...]
This is it.
Is it true that you can blow away any worries?
I can't say it like that, but...
No, it seems like you can solve any worries just by talking a little.
Really? Then I want you to solve it for me!
I'm sorry, but I want you to listen to this child's worries.
I'm AKB48 Team B's captain.
In Team B, there are members like Ikirin, Kojipa, and Milky.
Among those members, I'm wondering how I can be their captain.
Can you tell me?
I think it worked.
Really? I want you to solve it, but are you sure you can do it?
I'm sure I can do it.
Are you sure you can do it?
I'm pretty serious about it.
What about you?
Well...
I've talked about it on a similar show.
What is it?
Huh?
It can't be helped.
I'm Umeda.
I see.
She's right.
Yeah.
I see. I'm Umeda.
By the way, Irio-san...
This is a script, isn't it?
What do you think, Irio-san?
What do you think, Iriama-san?
It's like she's writing it for me.
Sometimes.
It's like she's writing it for me.
Sometimes.
I'm happy about it.
I'm Umeda, so I'm Irio.
This is the only one I could think of.
But it's true, right?
It's true.
It's true. I see. I'm Umeda, so it can't be helped.
It can't be helped.
I feel refreshed.
Let's go.
Wait a minute.
Huh?
Are you going to give it to me?
Thank you.
Wow.
It's 60,000 yen.
Irio.
That's definitely your name, isn't it?
Let's go.
But I feel refreshed.
I'm happy.
It's mine.
I don't know.
You should have told me in detail like this.
I see.
You forgot?
I didn't know at all.
Where did you forget?
I don't know.
Hey, don't give me weird answers.
Hey, listen to me.
Don't give me weird answers.
I'm sorry.
Don't give me weird answers.
What was Yuko drawing at first?
You should know if you rewind it.
Here is the original drawing.
What was she drawing?
Think about it before you rewind it and complete it.
Then, thinking!
What kind of picture is drawn on this messy paper?
Let's rewind it and see the answer.
What kind of picture is drawn on this messy paper?
[What is this?]
The answer is...
A picture of Sasha and Rino, abducted by aliens, drawn thinly.
It's a little thin because it's a pencil, but...
Congratulations to the person who got it right! I love you!
But I love you too, to the person who got it right!
See you!