AISubs v3.5
Hiding in the dark, I live.
That's just like you, Kairin!
Hmm, you human youkai!
- That's right! - What makes me happy?
When I come out, everyone's applause!
- Yes, yes, yes! - That makes me happy!
- That's a good thing! - Nothing can change it, right?
- Of course! - This applause and money, which is better?
- Well, money makes me happy! - You don't know anything!
- That's what you don't know! - That's right!
- No, it's a shame, but Golden Week is over. - Ah, that's a shame!
- When it's over, I'm looking forward to summer vacation. - Ah, summer vacation!
- This is already... - But you'll say it, right?
- Well...
- What are you doing?!
- You're funny!
- What?!
- Can you do me a favor? - Well...
- Do you know? When I was in summer camp... - Yes, yes...
- The sea! - The sea?!
- I'm Koumei, but I'm a man of the sea. - Of course, I've heard of you.
- I want to do it once...
- In the sea... - Yes, yes, yes!
- In English... - Yes!
- With a pizza toast. - What are you talking about?!
- That's "scuba diving"! - Ah, that's right!
- It's a little similar... - How is it similar?!
- Both of them have sticky cheese.
- Cheese has nothing to do with it!
- How is it not related?!
- Well, today...
- That scuba diving guy...
- Well, today...
- The three of us will do scuba diving!
- Yes, yes!
- The sea! - The sea!
- But...
- This scuba diving requires a bomb.
- Each of you will have a bomb...
- You'll put the bomb in your mouth...
- Depending on the bomb, you can breathe even in the sea!
- I see! That's a good idea!
- I'll do it right away!
- Here I go!
- Don't do it!
- Let's go over there!
- What are you talking about?!
- Scuba diving in the sea?!
- It's difficult! - Ah, I see!
- What should we do in the sea?
- You idiot! At times like that, you can't give a proper signal!
- If you tell your opponent something...
- At times like that, you're underwater!
- You read your opponent and make a sign like this...
- I want you to teach me!
- Of course!
- How do you like it? - It feels good!
- What are you talking about?!
- It doesn't matter! Call me when you have something more important to do!
- I see! - You can't call me all of a sudden for that!
- I know! I know!
- Listen to me!
What's so funny?
There is a shark.
Are you kidding me?
You will be eaten by sharks!
Wait a minute! If there is a shark, what should we do?
I want it!
Well, well! In such a case, there is a sign.
I want it!
It is dangerous only to find a shark, so I will give you such a sign.
I see! If you do like this, you will find a shark.
Yes, there is a shark!
Well, well! Customers, remember! This is a shark.
Customers, what are you doing?
We are here to see it!
What are you saying?
But this is a real sign.
If you do like this, you will find a shark.
You will be eaten by sharks!
Wait a minute!
What are you doing? Are you taking a picture of me?
You will be eaten by sharks!
If you take a picture of me, you will be eaten by sharks!
You will be eaten by sharks!
I see!
Are you human?
Thank you!
B and G, Nestle Japan, Nisshin Food, provided by Maiden.
Good evening! I'm Judge Kawaira!
Now, let me introduce you to me!
My pen name is "Hama-chan"!
I got it from my cute baby's real father!
Thank you very much!
That's funny!
Hello, Judge Kawaira!
Yes!
It's sudden, but which one is stronger, Kintaro or Momotaro?
I feel like it's Kintaro, but please tell me clearly!
Which one is stronger?
This is...
It's difficult!
Please leave it to me!
The answer is...
Momotaro's entrance!
Stop it!
Kintaro's entrance!
Because it's a real, real hot water!
I'm... I'm scared!
No, no, no!
According to my calculations, his entrance is later, but...
...since he was running around so fast, the hot water must have cooled down!
I'm sorry!
You're not good enough!
You know, if you pour hot water on me, it's like a mystery game!
Is that so?
Let me pour hot water on you!
You're just pouring it on me!
Not yet, not yet, not yet!
You're just pouring it on me!
Do you understand?
I'm pouring hot water on you!
Go! Go! Go! Go!
Now, do you want it?
Of course! Because it's a new card!
First of all, it's a game of rock-paper-scissors.
In the game of rock-paper-scissors, while the music is playing, if you turn around,
I will drop one of the items in this lab.
The two of you will take each other's items.
And the person who took it will read the card about the item.
I see.
If you can do as it is written there, you will get points.
But if you can't do it, you will get minus points.
Oh, it's easy to understand.
Well, first of all, this is it!
First of all, it's a new card!
Go! 1! Go! Go! Go! Let's go!
It's Gintaro!
But your face looks like a high-heeled apple.
Oh, really?
It's not bad.
Yeah.
Now, let's move on!
Yes.
Kendama de Karuta!
Here it is!
Not bad!
You can put it in once in three times, right?
What?!
Here?!
There!
OK!
Can I turn it?
You can turn it now.
Now, this is...
20 points!
Yes!
This is hard!
Now you should take it!
OK!
If you don't put it in at once, it's 20 points minus.
If you can't do it.
It's minus!
It's minus 20!
What did I take it for?
I hope you can do it.
I can't do it!
Now you can do it!
Remember! He's Monotaro and I'm High Heel Apple!
Remember I'm Apple Momoko!
- I got it! - High Heel Momoko! - I got it!
I got it, Mr. High Heel!
Now, here's the next one!
Now you can do it!
High Heel Momoko!
Wow!
Now, please match this with my card!
Yes!
I'll give you 30 points!
Yes! Thank you!
Well then, let's go!
Yes!
Upside down!
Don't turn around!
I wrote it!
I told you to do it!
Did you say it here?!
No, I didn't!
You said it all!
Mr. Motaro!
If you can do it, you get minus 30 points!
Next one is this!
Ryofu! Ryofu!
It's the same! It's the same!
I know! Let's do it together!
Oh, is that so?
Let's do it together!
Oh, is that so?
It's exactly the same!
What is it?
Let's go!
Stairs!
Go down more and more!
It's going up! It's going up! It's going up!
It's going up!
Ryofu!
Well, it seemed like there were stairs all over the place, so let's go with "OK"!
Next up is this!
Where is it?
Now, raw egg!
Where is the raw egg?
Here it is! Here it is! Ah, but I should have taken it!
Ah! Here it is! Ah! Here it is!
You didn't put it in!
You should have taken it!
Raw egg! Where is it?
I took the raw egg!
This is 30 points!
Now, let's play the card!
I'm being played by you, senpai!
This is a miracle!
I just grabbed it and it's a boiled egg!
You're such a fool!
What's a miracle, you fool!
A miracle has to happen!
There's a boiled egg inside!
Yes! Yes! A miracle has to happen!
I grabbed it and I thought it was done!
No...
It's a miracle!
A miracle has to happen!
I'm scared...
Ahhhh!
Is that a miracle?
Is it still there?
I'm going to check it!
You're the one I hate the most in this movie.
The worst.
Egg! Egg!
What's wrong with you?
Why? Why?
Why can't you break it?
Look, it's a boiled egg.
Isn't there something?
What?
Knock, knock, knock.
What's going on?
Let me check.
This is it.
Did it become a boiled egg?
Boiled egg...
Huh?
What's going on?
But you just hit me hard and it hurts and you're angry.
It's a boiled egg!
Great! Momotaro's number is now zero!
This is the last one!
The last one is a 30-point question!
Let's go!
The next one is this one!
Momotaro's number is now zero!
Let's go!
The card is this one!
It's easy, isn't it?
Let's go!
Straight!
He lifted up the heavy barbell!
It's still there!
It's like, "Don't turn this way!"
No!
If you lift it up...
Oh, I'm scared!
In this state...
Even if you get 30 points, Momotaro wins!
But if you don't lift it up...
This is a minus, so...
Oh my!
Kintaro will buy it!
Thank you very much!
No, no, no!
It's a rule!
How many kilos does it weigh?
This one is...
15 kilos, right?
This one is also 15 kilos.
15 kilos.
If this one is 15 kilos, this one is also 15 kilos.
It's impossible!
That's right!
It's 30 kilos, and this bar...
The bar is 4 kilos!
40 kilos? There's 10 kilos!
What?!
Oh, I see!
It's all 40 kilos!
Because there's a bar...
A bar...
Oh, I see!
OK, OK!
40 kilos...
How about 40 kilos?
Wait a minute!
Is it OK if I lift it up once?
Yes!
Wait a minute!
Why do you lift it up from such a place?
Are you crazy?
Stand up!
Yes, yes, yes!
What's wrong with you?
From now on...
From now on, what will you do?
Will you be happy?
I got it!
I can't lift it up with one leg.
Oh, really?
This is strange!
Then, how will you do it?
I can't do it like this.
Are you fooling me?
It's funny.
It's getting more and more funny.
Then...
This is my last chance!
Not there!
Stop it!
It's -30 vs -20 and it's Kintaro!
And now, the real father of Kawaii Baby...
Kintaro and Motaro!
Kintaro's brain is strong and full of energy!
Motaro!
Try it!
It's really heavy.
It's strong!
That's what I'm talking about!
No, it's not! It's scary!
Your legs are bad!
My legs are bad?
Try it!
My legs? Like this?
Hold it like this...
Is this okay?
No!
Why?!
And that was Downtown Mini Theater!
Give it back!
Oh, right now!
Give me back my 3 million yen!
3 million yen, Motaro!
What are you doing?!
Don't touch me!
I'm sorry about that.
It's okay.
He's a nice guy, but...
he has a heart of stone.
I'm sorry about that.
It's okay.
I'm sorry about this every time.
If you can do it, tell me right now!
I always tell you!
Do you know...
Denshoba?
Do you know him?
Yes, I know him.
In the past, people used various means to contact people in the distance, didn't they?
One of those means...
Yes, you're right.
...was a bell.
Yes, you're right.
Morse code.
Yes, you're right.
You could write a letter and break it.
Yes, you're right.
And then phones were born.
Yes, yes, yes.
Nowadays, cell phones and fax machines...
They're useful, aren't they?
Even so...
What's "j Ring Boke Bell"!?
What's it!?
What!?
Hey!
What!?
Hey!
Find out for yourself!
"j Ring Boke Bell", you say...
Oh, excuse me...
Hey!
Power car...
Hey, hey!
I've been waiting for you!
I'm sorry...
Um, wait, wait...
What's up?
Show me, show me...
What's up?
Um...
Oh, show me...
Oh, so cute!
Oh, this, this, this, this!
You're awesome!
You're great!
"j Ring Boke Bell", you say...
Oh, they're all expensive...
Oh, they're expensive...
I knew it!
Coins, huh?
Fast, fast!
Agh...
Fast, fast...
How much was this one?
This was 15 million yen.
15 million yen...
Ah, I don't know about that...
You...
All right!
When will you put these in for me?
Um...
I'm wondering if you can put them in for me for a month?
A month?
"j Ring Boke Bell", you say...
Not a month?
"j Ring Boke Bell", you say...
10 days!
Put them in for me for 10 days!
If you say so...
Um...
Give me that.
Yes.
You know where the string comes out?
Yes.
Is there a parking lot on the right corner?
Yes, yes.
Put this in there and this!
And the pins!
Yes!
Please!
I understand.
For now...
You don't need any tools, do you?
Yes.
Is this enough?
One, two, three, four, five!
Yes, five million.
Five million!
Yes.
Certainly!
I understand!
Five million!
Yes!
Thank you very much!
Please!
Thank you!
Good morning!
Can I see it again?
Sure you can!
Do you own a car?
I do!
You don't want a drive?
Let's go somewhere far away!
To Menta or somewhere else!
What a waste of time!
I guess...
A drive is a drive...
I bet it'll be fun for you.
Anyhow...
Have you ever been in love for one night only?
Haven't I told you?
Well, I'm this age, you know...
Have you ever seen a flower of love bloom from the day you first met?
I'm sure you have.
That's a wonderful thing.
I see.
I was there last week or so.
I happened to be blessed with that kind of thing.
I see.
That's a wonderful thing.
I see.
And last night or so...
I'm in love!
Damn you!
It's a joke. It's a joke, but it's a joke.
President, about the car...
What day was it on the 10th?
It's too far away. It's hard to see.
Huh?
Where are my glasses?
You found them!
Look for them!
If you don't, I won't know!
It's important, isn't it?
Where did you lose them?
If you don't find them, I won't know!
When I was looking at my pamphlet...
What's wrong with you?
I'm asking you!
If you don't find them, I won't know!
You knew about it, didn't you?
Yes.
Your jacket?
My jacket isn't here.
I don't know anything.
Teacher!
My jacket! My jacket!
Masaya Nakibushi!
Sensei! It's been a while! You've gotten so much better!
Thank you for that time!
Sensei! It's been a while! Please remember me for a little longer!
Do you remember me? The one who always got bullied and cried all the time?
It's me! It's me!
What are you talking about?
I've gotten bigger!
What are you talking about?
It's me! It's me! Sensei! Sensei!
It's me! Nakibushi Masaya!
You haven't said anything yet!
It's me! It's me! It's only me!
It's only me you're looking at!
It's only me!
What are you talking about?
Bibi! Bibi! Bibi!
It's him!
Sensei! Over there! Over there, Sensei!
Sensei! Over there! Over there!
What's wrong?
Over there, Sensei!
What's wrong?
Sensei!
Have you been taught anything?
Shut up!
Let's go!
Yes, sir!
It seems that the one in history is older than me.
Your father should have given you a design drawing of a megaton missile before he died.
I won't say you don't know about it.
I don't know about it!
If you don't admit it, it'll hurt me, boy!
Even if I know about it, I won't give it to someone like you!
That's it...
Then you should just die!
Help me, you idiot!
Idiot!
You're an idiot!
Idiot is an idiot!
What?!
Idiot is an idiot?!
Are you the strongest super-tall man ever created by Kentaro's father, Professor Zaizen?!
Alright! Idiot Man!
Let's beat him with Idiot Hand!
By wearing Idiot Man's Idiot Hand,
Idiot Man's iron weight will increase to 150,000 power!
That's right!
What should we do?!
There's bread...
What should we eat?!
I'm sorry...
Beat him up!
We won't eat him alive!
Bread! Wait! Wait! Wait!
Here you go...
What should we eat?!
What's wrong with you?!
Look at me!
There's nothing wrong with you!
Look at me!
Look!
Is that wrong?!
Ouch!
You!
What are you doing?!
Heheheh... heheheh... heheheh...
You really are an idiot, aren't you?
International Memory Contest for Amateur Puppets!
Okabe-san, the...
3rd!
Is it the 3rd?
It's only now, but the champion of the first round is gone.
There is information.
Information?
What are you talking about? There is a head like this.
Normally you don't need a head like this.
The head looks like a magazine.
I'm talking about a magazine and you are clapping.
You know it well.
I know it well.
Now, Mr. Amazo, please go to the judges' seats.
Thank you very much.
Now, our second judge is Mr. Utsumi Yasushiya!
Mr. Sato Sanose!
Our third judge is Mr. Suzuki Rannan!
Now, let's go!
First of all, the first one is Mr. Matsuura Seikichi.
It's "monkey dance"!
Here you go!
What? Is it like this?
"Monkey dance"!
"Monkey, monkey, monkey dance"!
Thank you very much!
Monkey dance history...
About 50 years.
50 years!
Wonderful!
If you can dance for 50 years, you can't win!
I've been doing it for 50 years.
I'm really a monkey.
Yagura-san, how was "monkey dance" just now?
It's actually a monkey, isn't it?
Yes, it's a monkey. You're getting old, aren't you?
Thank you very much!
I'd like to ask you about your well-being with a song and dance.
Murata Saburo-san, please!
Thank you very much!
I'll ride an iron rod!
Are you serious? Are you serious about this?
What are you talking about?
You're shaking a little, aren't you?
Let me rest here for a while.
Gah!
Why are you doing that?
What?
You look like you're about to pass out.
Applause!
Is it over?
Are you okay?
When are you going to take it off?
That's right!
You know...
You're so naive!
When are you going to take it off?
Why did you put that in the water?
Please don't imitate children.
Don't imitate adults, either.
Thank you very much!
The last performer is an opera band.
Mr. Motoo Murano! Thank you very much!
(Laughter)
Opera "Moshi, Please"
(Laughter)
What is it? It's "Moshi, Series", right?
series
It's "Moshi, please"
(Laughter)
Moshi, series
Animal Edition
please
(Laughter)
Mr. Murano, please!
Go ahead!
If
(Laughter)
If the dog cried
(Laughter)
Waan woo wan!
(Laughter)
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
(Laughter)
And if a cat cried in an opera...
Miaaaa!
Ko-ko-ko-ko-ko-ko-ko-kekko!
(Ko-ko-ko-ko-ko-kekko!)
This is where it ends.
Mr. Murano.
Yes, Uzawa here.
Um...
Are you chewing gum?
Ah...
Okay, Mr. Murano, thank you very much!
Thank you very much.
Let's hear it one more time!
One more time!
Thank you very much!
Okay, number one, two, and three...
Okay, judges and judges!
Huh?
Um...
Mr. Murano...
This is...
Um...
Okay, judge and judge!
Please!
Um...
Number three!
Mr. Murano!
Mr. Operaman!
Mr. Murano!
(Applause)
And, you know, being 84 years old and being able to say this...
It gives you courage, as you always do.
And it makes you want to work harder!
Yes!
That's right!
Okay, so, everyone here today...
Thank you very much!
Thank you very much, judges and judges!
We will now close the show!
(Applause)
A laughing professional who supports a TV show behind the scenes!
The CEO of an entertainment production company, Koji Imada, will tell you more about this laughing professional!
Today, we have a professional laughing professional with us!
Here he is!
He's been on many shows!
We hope you enjoy watching this laughing professional!
Thank you!
That's why I'm guiding you today.
These people have created a laughing specialist.
They are specialists who can control their own laughter as they like.
What these specialists are watching now is a touching masterpiece of human and animal love, "The Oriental Story".
However, even if specialists are watching such a serious video, they can still laugh.
While this "patriot" is laughing, we have to keep laughing.
Can we laugh even in such a harsh situation?
"Ah, I want to go home." "There's an old woman crying over there."
Let's go for a trip.
Are you stupid?
"This is what a professional does." "Is that so?"
This is what a professional does.
No one can laugh here!
Let's go.
"Let's go to the supermarket." "Why?"
Ah! And the last ones left are Taro and Jiro.
It's not over yet! It's not over yet!
You're not going to say, 'That's good, that's good.'
No, no, it's very wonderful.
But this is not all of their professionalism.
We will continue to show you more.
If you like it, we would like you to use it.
Let's go to the next place.
This is Fujiya.
Let's go.
If you come with me, you will laugh forever!
Sensei! Sensei, what's wrong with you?
Sensei! This way!
What's wrong with you?
The next situation is...
Coldness!
Can we laugh in this coldness?
It's so cold that we can't even show our facial expressions!
That's right!
But those professionals are saying that we can laugh loudly with a big mouth!
Then, let's go inside right now!
What's wrong with you?
Hey! Are you used to it?
This way, please!
Wow, it's so cold!
Sensei! Sensei! Sensei! Sensei, where are you going?
Hey, wait! Let me hear you!
Wow, it's so cold!
It's so cold!
So, how is it?
This place is...
This place is -20 degrees below zero!
It's -20 degrees below zero.
That's right!
But those professionals are nowhere to be found!
Over there!
It's -40 degrees below zero!
Is it inside?
Yes, it's inside!
It's inside like this?
Yes! And if I turn on this light again...
I will laugh in that situation!
What? At -40 degrees?
Yes!
Let's go home!
Why?
Leave it! Leave it!
Why?
No one should open it!
Let's go!
Be careful!
Thank you!
Ouch!
It's -40 degrees!
We are wearing this kind of clothes, but it's fine!
Yes, we are wearing normal clothes!
Are you professionals?
Well, yes!
And if you ask me how amazing -40 degrees is...
Yes!
This flower!
Yes!
Is it a rose flower?
Yes!
Look! It's so crisp!
Yes, it's a rose!
It's so crisp!
What's this?
This is a wet towel!
A wet towel!
This is minus 40!
My nose hurts!
My nose hurts and my face hurts too!
Can these old ladies and professionals laugh?
I don't have confidence in this, but what do you think?
They laugh!
It's amazing, isn't it?
Even among professionals, this is the only thing that can make them laugh.
Is there anything else we can do?
For example...
For example?
For example, in this cold weather...
You! What are you doing?
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
I don't laugh here!
You don't laugh!
I only have a flashlight!
Oh, I see! For example, you...
Oh!
Metal! Take metal! Metal!
Metal!
It's minus 40, but metal...
It's amazing, isn't it?
Mr. Imagawa, you're amazing!
Mr. Imagawa is amazing!
Old ladies are amazing, but Mr. Imagawa is amazing too!
Amazing! Beautiful!
Mr. Imagawa, you're amazing!
With such a mild wind and cold weather like this...
I think he'd never fail under harsh conditions!
Mr. Imagawa!
Your nose is freezing!
It's freezing!
It's frozen! It's frozen!
It's gone!
This way!
Hey, don't smoke!
Why?
Don't you like this project?
Is it okay?
Until now, we have said it as a group.
Certainly, there is a doubt that someone is making fun of us.
Of course.
Next, we will show you our individual skills.
What is this?
Look at this!
Yes!
In this, we have professional workers.
Yes.
Each of them has their own skills.
In this?
Yes!
And when we open the door, the switch will be turned on.
I see.
When we get light, we will laugh, right?
That's right!
When we get light...
You are serious creatures!
Is it okay?
Please open it!
Oh, I see.
We will open it.
Please open it!
We won't laugh anymore!
Wait!
This is a serious laugh!
We won't laugh, right?
Please open it!
Wait!
This is a serious laugh!
We won't laugh, right?
For some reason, each of them has their own laugh.
That's right.
Each of them has their own laugh.
Look!
We will laugh even if it's double!
Look!
They are laughing!
Don't close it properly!
They are laughing!
This is...
It's like...
Isn't it like that?
Hey, you!
Get out!
I'm telling you to get out!
Do you understand?
Okay.
Well, we were alone, but...
I pushed them even more!
Despite the harsh conditions, I want to show you how great they are!
You've got a problem with that?
Let's go!
- Now, teachers. - Yes.
- Next is... - What's that?
- Fear! How much fear can you get? - Yes.
- If you're a professional, you can get this much. - Yes.
- Today's teacher is... Look at this! - What are you talking about?
- Don't you know? - It's an amazing set!
- You're lying! - Isn't it an ant?
- This is Nista, isn't it? - Wow!
- Among this set, this Pirates is the most terrifying! - Oh!
- If you ride this Pirates... - Yes.
- ...and put it in this scariest and highest place... - Yes.
- ...and turn on this patrol light... - Yes.
- ...they will start laughing! - Yes.
- Now, let's... - Yes.
- Let's see how far we can go... - Yes.
- ...among this fear! - Yes.
Now, please move!
- It's still normal. - It's totally normal, isn't it?
- It's totally normal, isn't it?
Look at that!
Look at that! Look at that!
Oh, look at that!
- Wow, look at that! - It's totally normal, isn't it?
- But...
- Every time we ride it... - It's totally normal, isn't it?
- ...we get so scared! - Yes.
- We get so scared! - And we start to laugh a lot!
- Yes! Yes! - Laugh a lot!
- Yeah!
Whooo!
Hey, go and see it!
Good job, everyone! How is it, teachers?!
Well, well, well...
There's no one who can laugh in this situation!
These professionals! Teachers!
Again?!
Where do you think you're going?!
It's over, so...
It's over, but...
If you don't mind, can we do this show?
Yes.
Please!
Yes, yes.
Thank you for your time and for your busy schedule!
So, what do you think of this show?
Well...
We'll leave it up to one of you.
Let's see what happens.
Let's go home!
Let's go home.
Thank you very much.
Thank you for your time!
We, Tantan, will sing a song at the end of the show and present it to you!
If you like it, please come and listen to it!
Fall in love!
The moment I'm in love with you, I'm sure I'm feeling you.
Fall in love!
I'm grateful for the romance that made our encounter possible.
Fall in love!
I don't want to forget this feeling forever and ever.
Fall in love!
I'm grateful for the romance that made our encounter possible.
Fall in love!
I'm grateful for the romance that made our encounter possible.
"Nestle Japan," "Nisshin Shokushin," "Made in China"