AISubs v3.5
Today, I will introduce you to a new American teacher, so please listen to the real English and improve quickly.
Teacher, please come in.
Let me introduce you. This is erotica sensei.
Sensei, please teach us.
Listen to me.
I can't do it! I can't do it! I can't do it!
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I can't do it!
Help me!
What are you saying?
B and Z
Kirinbi Barrage
Nissin Products
Maiden
Sent to you by Dot Offer.
This is the first episode of this show, right?
Yes, it is.
I'm doing a lot of things for this show.
What?
I'm doing a lot of things, but I can't win.
You can't win...
You should have won in the script.
But if you win, it's over.
That's right.
You should have won.
Well, for now, I'm doing my best.
I see.
You should have won.
I think I can win today.
But you look...
Oh, really?
You look unpleasant.
Let me see.
You look strong because you look unpleasant.
Oh, I see.
Yes, let's see.
This week's hero is...
Kantari Senshi.
Shichigeman!
Fujiwara Eiji-kun, 18 years old.
Well, 18...
You're in high school, right?
Fujiwara Eiji-kun.
Yes.
You do it.
It's a mission.
Yes.
Make the smell coming out of the armpit liquid once.
Boil the liquid.
A future-type light beam that emits light by applying a material that the locomotive moves with steam.
I don't know.
Armpit light beam.
I don't know.
Feature!
Yes.
One meter and seventy-five centimeters.
I see.
Seventy kilograms.
I see.
AB type.
Yes.
He lived with his parents when he was eight years old.
He still sleeps with his older brother in a double bed.
No, no, no.
Even though he's one meter and seventy-five centimeters.
Yes.
Shichigeman, a loser.
Yes.
Now, let's see what kind of feature he will show us.
What kind of feature?
You lost, didn't you?
You monster.
No.
You're pretending to be a monster.
Oh, I see.
Let's see it now.
Abnormal human gas tank light.
Here you go.
This is a kanfu dojo that has just opened its dojo today.
Keikobo was full of energy with the passionate practice of the students of the dojo.
My name is Shihan.
Oh, you are Shihan.
You look like a weak Shihan.
I used to be weak.
Oh, I see.
But now my Shihan is strong.
Oh, I see.
I was thinking of getting a job.
A job seeker is very welcome.
Oh, is that so?
I don't like long jobs.
Is there a course where I can live for one day?
Even if you say you can live for one day...
Oh, I see.
Since the dojo is open today...
Yes.
Let's make a course for one day.
Oh, really?
It's a little...
tough.
What do you mean?
Well, well.
Let's call Shihandai for me.
Yes.
Hey, Shihandai!
Come in for a second!
That was a joke. Laugh!
Shihandai, how are you?
I'm fine, Shihandai.
I'm getting old.
I'll leave it to you, Shihandai.
I'm sorry, Shihandai.
Oh, Shihandai's Fujiwara.
Is he really strong?
I don't know.
Is it okay for you to say that?
I don't know about that.
Fujiwara!
What's wrong with you?
That's enough, Fujiwara.
Fujiwara!
That's mean of you!
Get out of my way!
Um...
I'm sorry for being rude.
Wait!
Um... wait a minute!
Wait a minute!
Listen to me!
You're making me look bad!
Wait a minute!
Listen to me!
Fujiwara, wait!
I am...
your...
fan!
Hey!
Why are you acting like a foreigner all of a sudden?
Are you okay?
Nice to meet you!
Um...
teach him a lesson.
It's dangerous if you don't hold it properly.
Okay.
What?
That's a joke!
What the hell is this?
Hey, hold my arm.
What? What? What?
Hey, Mori! Mori!
You're a comedian! You don't know anything!
You don't know anything!
Give me a break! I got it!
I got it! I got it! What are you talking about?
I got it! I got it! What is it?
Wait!
You're weak!
Fujiwara-san!
Damn it!
Ega-bosu!
Stop the match! Stop it! Stop it!
You think you've avenged me?
Stop it! Stop the match!
Stop it! Stop it!
Fujiwara!
Are you serious?
Hurry up and transform!
Hurry up!
Hurry up and transform!
Transform!
Hurry up and transform!
You're the coolest guy I've ever seen.
You can't even say that you're the best.
It's like you're making me laugh.
I'm not laughing.
But if you compare it to the atmosphere just now...
It's like you're making me laugh.
But if you compare it to the atmosphere just now...
It's like you're making me laugh.
I see.
Okay!
This is your first strategy!
What's this?
You'll flip two coins each...
And you'll pair up with your father.
I see!
The one with the most coins wins!
This is amazing!
Try it!
Number nine!
Number ten!
Okay!
Number four!
Number ten!
Whoa, what's this?!
I got it!
Sorry.
Hey, this is terrible!
It's worse than death!
I didn't think it would be like this!
Let me see it.
This is no good.
Want me to bring it?
Wow!
I cut it.
You're a guest.
You dirty, dirty dog!
Can you stand this nervousness?!
You're right!
Just accept my challenge!
The next challenge is this!
This is...
Fujiwara is surprised, too!
Suck it!
What's this?!
Listen up!
I'm going to let you participate, too!
There are five kinds of drinks here!
One, two, three, four, five!
I'm going to choose three of them and put them in here!
Shake them!
Suck them and guess what's in them!
It'd be amazing if you got it right!
Listen up!
I'm going to mix them up now!
Close your eyes!
Suck it!
Put it in!
Suck it!
This is it!
Suck it!
Make sure you don't break it!
Suck it!
Am I really a hero?!
Suck it!
Let's start with you, Gokkura.
Me first?!
What's that?!
I don't need it!
Suck it, you bastard!
Suck it!
I said suck it, you bastard!
What's that?!
Suck it, you bastard!
Your friend is dying!
That's enough!
Each flavor is too strong for me to distinguish.
This is scary!
Our guest, Ogchan.
Oh, Ogchan!
Ogchan...
Ogchan is good.
What?
Where did I go wrong?
It's Ogchan, isn't it?
It's funny, though!
I know! I know!
In the soy sauce...
There's honey in it!
Oh, that's it!
Let's go with three flavors.
Soy sauce, honey...
Orange juice!
Soy sauce, honey, orange juice!
And Gokkura against it!
Soy sauce, miso soup...
Miso soup!
Orange juice!
Gokkura Perfect!
Wow!
Thank you! Thank you!
Damn you! How can you suck so well?
But I have to defeat you today!
Before Gokkura Beam, take my Wakige Beam!
Wakige!
Beam!
Brother!
You're really going to win, right?
Of course!
You're not cheating, right?
I did it!
Finally, our hero, Tsuchigeman, succeeded in defeating his long-cherished wish, Gokkura.
At that moment...
Grandpa!
You bastard!
Gokkura, right?
That's right!
I'm immortal. I won't die.
Damn you!
To hell with you!
Let's run!
Watch out!
Brother!
You were a wig when you were a kid, weren't you?
You're disgusting!
The rebellious warrior, Kishigeman, was tough from his name.
Is there really a hero who can defeat Gokuhira?
No one!
Give up Gyutarou!
There are only three people who can give up!
No one!
It's a set of Oishi-kyo and Keizo!
Handling!
Kou-chan, an apple for you! Here you go!
She won't eat it.
Kou-chan, I'll give you an apple.
Kou-chan!
She won't eat it.
I see, Kou-chi.
Kou-chi, you want daddy's, don't you?
Here you go, Kou-chi.
Say "ah".
Kou-chi!
Open your mouth and eat it.
Kou-chi, say "ah"!
There, there, there!
Kou-chi!
Say "mug, mug", Kou-chi.
Kou-chi, over here!
Mug, mug, mug!
Mug, mug...
Here you go!
Kou-chi!
Here you go!
Kou-chi!
Wait for me!
Come on!
Hey!
You're one of them from now on!
Hey!
It's no use looking for rain!
Damn it!
Hey!
Siri!
Hey!
What the hell did you do?
Thanks.
Actually, it rained during yesterday's soccer match.
Soccer?
Yes.
That's not a big deal!
Then... who are you?
It rained during the sports day.
Sports day?
Yes.
That's terrible.
Theirs is worse.
I'm on vacation.
Vacation?
Twice in spring and autumn.
That's terrible.
I was in trouble at the time.
But...
The guy you sent there is doing better than you.
Don't be surprised!
Big brother!
Yes!
Tell me honestly!
When did you make it rain?
The day Hamada went home.
Let's welcome the fifth round and today we'll have a special show!
I'm Matsumoto Shita, judge of the jury.
I'm Ryoko Nomura.
I'm Izumi Ito.
Today we have two judges of the jury.
Ms. Natsuki Ogamoto and Ms. Kachou Tsukitei are the judges of the fifth round!
Ms. Ogamoto, you have a great style!
I was too shy to show my room photo.
You were going to show it?
My rival, Mr. Ayase Sugimoto, said it first.
You're just saying it!
I thought I'd be second.
You really thought I'd say it first?
Yes, I thought you'd say it first.
I'll say it first? What if I'm first this time?
You're so eager!
I'm sorry.
And next to her is...
The judge of the fifth round, Ms. Kachou Tsukitei!
When you said "fifth round", you showed up and didn't show up.
The key points are...
Size, shape, color, atmosphere...
What do you mean, "atmosphere"?
And whether you're facing forward or downward.
That's true.
And whether one of you is facing this way and the other is facing that way.
There's a lot of things.
It's ideal for you to be facing upwards.
Well, please watch and judge that part carefully!
Yes, sir!
Now, let's go!
Today's contestants are moms!
Let me introduce them one by one!
Entry number one, Hiroko Iwata!
Her size is 93/63/90.
She is a proud mom who is good at D-cup and social dance!
Entry number two, Mariko Asaoka!
Her size is 93/95/87/83.
She is currently living in Asakusa with her 48-year-old boyfriend for the third time in her life!
She is a woman who has been single since childhood!
Entry number three, Madoka Hirai!
Her size is 93/69/90.
She writes novels as a hobby and secretly dreams of becoming an actress.
Entry number four, Kazuko Okamura!
Her size is 97/69/95.
She is a mom who has been doing D-cup and social dance since she was a baby!
She is a teacher who teaches 150 students!
Entry number five, Sachiko Oda!
Her size is 107/70/95.
She is a woman who is proud of being an actress!
Entry number four, Sachiko Oda!
Her size is 107/70/90.
She is a mom of 32 years who has been doing D-cup and social dance since she came all the way from Hiroshima!
Now, let's give these five moms another round of applause!
Now, questions one through five.
Today we have something special for you.
Now, first of all, we have a question for these five moms.
Yes, teachers?
Yes.
Well, since you're all here today...
Yes.
I'd like you to turn around.
Yes.
I'd like you to sway a little.
I see.
Well, I'm going to turn around with my handy, so make sure you can see me.
Now, let's have the first mom swing a little.
Go ahead.
Wow!
Wow, wow!
Is it heavy? Is it heavy?
Teacher, you're shining!
Now, second mom!
Huh? What?
Wow! It's a torch! A torch!
Wow!
Awesome!
Third mom!
Oh...
What are you looking for?
Now, fourth mom!
Wow!
Fifth mom!
Wow!
Well, you're a cyber-hunter, so you must have a hundred and seven.
It's Brazil!
Yes, it's Brazil!
You must have five people, right?
Now, Oga!
Yes.
Yes, Mr. Oga.
Since it's a living thing, I'd like you to tell me what you've gained and lost.
I see.
Yes, I understand.
Now, starting with number one.
Now, number two.
All of my boyfriends have praised me.
What did they say?
That's a good thing.
It's good to be praised.
How do you get praised?
Like, "Wow, you have a nice shape."
Is there anything you've lost?
On the train, I meet the conductor about once a week.
I see.
Now, number three!
I'm very proud of my friends.
I'm jealous of them.
That's what it is.
Number four!
If I say I've lost something, it's a little too big.
When I wear a swimsuit, it sticks out.
That's why you don't like it.
Is it from the side?
Yes, it is.
So I push it in from the side.
I push it in from the side.
Now, number five!
I want to wear a trendy T-shirt now.
A trendy T-shirt!
But...
T-shirts are really popular now.
They've been popular for a while now.
But you can't wear a T-shirt because it's too big?
It's a little embarrassing.
Is that so?
Now, number six!
Yes, Mr. Matsumoto?
Well, I think there are a lot of things you can pin up.
Number three?
Yes, yes.
A celebrity you can pin up.
Or, like, "Can I pin you up here?"
A celebrity you can pin up.
Please say that.
A celebrity you can pin up.
There might be some.
There were some members.
Now, number one!
Yes, Yuki Matsumura.
Yuki Matsumura!
Number two!
President Clinton.
Why me?!
Now, number three!
Masakazu Tamura.
Number four!
Tatsuo Umemiya.
Don't say it like that! Tatsuo Umemiya!
Number five!
Murai Kunio.
I see. I understand.
Anything else?
Number five is...
Number five?
Number five is good at dancing.
Dancing?
Yes, I want to see it.
Really?
Yes, I want to see it.
I like dancing.
I'm good at dancing, so don't look down on me.
No. 4 - Yuki Saori.
No. 5 - Nishida Toshiyuki.
Ah, I see. He said it, so it's no doubt.
Now, from 1st to 5th, everyone will take a sexy pose and let's listen to the judges' comments.
Now, from 1st, please!
What are you doing?
Now, 2nd, please!
Oh? Oh? Oh? What are you showing off?
Wow, a fluorescent color.
Now, 3rd, please!
What is that?
Hey, take a break!
Ah, 4th!
Wow!
Oh, that's great!
Yes, thank you.
Now, last, 5th!
What is it?
Now you can see the content of the questions and their faces and their bodies.
First of all, the first person, please come forward!
Hiroko Iwata, 50 years old.
The second person, please come forward!
Hiroko Iwata, 50 years old.
Mariko Asakawa, 42 years old.
Now, the third person, please come forward!
Madoka Hirai, 46 years old.
Now, the fourth person, please come forward!
Kazuko Okamura, 49 years old.
Now, the fifth person, please come forward!
Fifty-six years old.
And now, from number one to number five, everyone has gathered together.
Now, let's go!
Who will be the winner? Teachers, please raise your boards.
Go ahead!
Number five! Number five! Number five! Number one! Number five!
And so, the winner is...
Number five!
Who will be the winner? Teachers, please raise your boards.
And so, the winner is...
Number five!
She's good-looking, isn't she?
What?
She looks like Richard!
Good morning!
Congratulations!
Thank you very much!
I'm about to cry!
Oh, I'm so happy!
Why are you crying when you hear something like this?
Oh, I'm so happy!
Oh, I'm so happy you came!
Aren't you happy that you weren't chosen?
I'm so happy!
I'm so happy you came!
And so, the winner is...
Ms. Oda will...
First of all, as a reward...
Ms. Nasuki Okamoto will receive...
Oh, that's right!
...her favorite Kojikonga!
Yes!
Oh, Kojikonga!
Yes!
Then, please wear this and have fun in town!
Yes!
Thank you!
Now, let's start with Ms. Kato.
Yes!
Now, for your sake...
Yes!
...please sing "Nageki no boin"!
Yes!
Ready, go!
Oda-san's boobs are like a watermelon to a fruit.
Dad bites into them.
Mothers' wombs are for babies to suck.
They're different from Dad's.
How nostalgic!
Which country's words are "boin" from?
This nostalgic Showa Japanese language.
If a big one is "boin",
a small one is "koin-ya"
and a smaller one is "nain-ya".
It's been a while.
Thank you very much, Oda-san.
This has been the Moricon Mothers' Contest!
An animal park that gives love to children.
This is a story about the love and passion of the people who work in such an animal park.
Itao-san, I think the new breeders that the chairman mentioned earlier were supposed to come today, right?
Oh, you mean Connie-san?
What?! You knew about it?!
Actually, the new breeders that are coming today are my seniors who helped me a lot when I was in college.
What?! Is that person single?!
Again with you! You change your mind as soon as you see a man!
Shut up and call Dinos during the show and tell him to buy a set of scallops for men!
If you're going to say goodbye like that, you shouldn't say such things!
Hey!
What are you doing?!
Chairman!
There's no time for you to just sit there and drink!
As you've heard before, the new breeders are coming, right?!
The new breeders are coming in one by one!
One of you is going to have a bad time!
What?!
What's wrong with you?!
Why didn't you tell me before?! Huh?!
Well...
Connie-san...
Hello.
How's it going, Connie-san?
I'm sorry for being late, but...
I just took a look around this park...
For more than ten years...
I've been studying...
What are you doing?!
I've been studying animals in the savannah of Africa...
As a result...
When I look around this zoo...
Something's missing...
I don't know what you're talking about, but...
What's wrong with you?!
Does it hurt?
I'm sorry!
That's love.
As expected of you, senpai.
It's true that this zoo doesn't have enough love.
And you don't have enough vegetables because of the cold wind.
Delicious, delicious!
I'm sorry for being late.
I'm Sakagibara Ruby.
Shut up!
I love you!
Well, that song was terrible!
If it was so noisy, I wouldn't like it no matter how good it was!
It's your fault!
Everyone, please look at this.
Look at it.
Look at it!
Look at it properly!
Manager!
It's not good!
The tiger is talking!
Who is he?
He's a newcomer, Conny-tan, who joined us today.
Conny-tan.
Nice to meet you.
For now, Conny-tan will be in charge of the hedgehog.
No, no.
I'm the manager.
Manager?
I'm the manager!
Manager!
Huh?
Please let me take care of this strange tiger.
Tiger?
Brother, brother!
You know, it's not easy for an amateur like me to take care of a tiger.
If I did it, it would be three times more interesting now.
Are you guys fighting?
Be quiet.
Listen.
Let's talk about the future slowly from now on.
Look.
That planet is north and south.
What are you talking about?
Your love...
Wait!
Tiger and I have been working together for ten years!
You bastard, you're making me angry!
We've been working together for ten years!
I'm the manager!
What did you say?
Calm down, calm down.
I know how you want to take care of the tiger.
And I know what you're saying now.
That's right, that's right.
If you do that, I don't know how you two will be able to control the tiger from now on.
I want you to show me which of you is better at controlling the tiger.
Fine!
No matter how you look at it, I can't control the tiger!
Right, tiger?
No, but...
I like people who can play the drums.
You're talking about the Kinchan Band, right?
You bastard!
If you do that, we'll fight here!
Number one, Konkuden Kimu.
The sea is...
What are you saying?
I'll beat you up!
You can't even look me in the eye!
You can't look me in the eye!
You're wrong!
You want me to sing, don't you?
Of course!
Tiger!
Sing me your usual song!
I'm counting on you!
Everyone, come here.
To...the...toe...toe...what's it called?
The parent.
To the parent.
To the parent of the...
To the parent of...
To the parent of the...
You two are too close!
I don't know anymore!
Shut up!
To the side.
That's enough.
What kind of conversation is this?
What's going on?
I'm getting the power I've never had before!
Chairman.
Yes?
So you've seen the fight, haven't you?
That's right.
You've all seen it, haven't you?
That's right.
Now you know who's the winner, don't you?
See you later.
I'm going out for a bit.
See you later.
Take care.
See you later.
Ciao.
It can't be helped.
You've given up, haven't you?
Wait a minute!
Yes?
What is it?
I'm sorry, Chairman.
Yes?
I've never given you my opinion before...
...but I'd like you to hear it today.
If it's what you think, I'll say it.
Chairman.
Yes?
Do you want bread or rice?
What?
What are you talking about?
That's not true!
It's not like that!
It's true!
Bread or rice? What about snacks?
It's not like that!
Mr. Imada...
...what memories have you had of riding a tiger?
I'm sorry.
Mr. Kimura, how do you like it?
Ask him!
Are you still into it?
You like it here, don't you?
I've always liked you, Mr. Kimura.
That's not true!
No, it's true that I'm better at riding a tiger.
But for me, a tiger is like a brother.
Please!
Don't take a tiger from me!
M-ma'am...
You're going to be a doctor!
M-ma'am...
Can you let me decide on a tiger?
I guess you can't.
It's fine!
You know the answer, don't you?
Is it fine?
Please.
You'll be satisfied with it.
E-Enen, right?
Yes.
You and Gordian...
Yes.
Now, Konitan, you come here.
Yes.
Now, I'll call out "tiger".
You call out "tiger".
E-Enen, be careful.
Hey, "tiger"!
"Tiger"!
It's your first time, isn't it?
What's going on?
"Tiger"!
"Tiger"?
It's your first time, isn't it?
"Tiger"?
Come here, "tiger"!
It's your first time, isn't it?
I don't like it, but come here, "tiger"!
I'm with you, aren't I?
"Tiger" isn't coming to me, is it?
"Tiger"!
Come here.
Yes.
If you come here, you're a star!
You're a star!
I'll make you look like Hakimoto Kinsara!
Come here, "tiger"!
"Tiger"!
Aren't we always together?
When we were young, we caught a girl in Shinjuku together.
Aren't we always together?
"Tiger" isn't coming!
"Tiger"!
"Tiger" isn't coming!
Go away!
It's cold...
It's a horse! A horse!
A horse is coming!
Huh?
Well...
"Tiger"!
Be honest!
"Tiger"!
I'm in trouble.
Earlier, I said that this zoo wasn't full of love.
Isn't there love in a place like this?
Senpai...
Well, it can't be helped.
Well, well...
As I said earlier, Konitan is a hedgehog.
I understand.
With such a wonderful zoo...
I...
I really... you know...
What are you doing?
I'm going to remove hedgehogs.
Be strong!
What did you say?!
With such a zoo...
With such a beautiful woman...
If you could give me a million yen a month...
It wouldn't be a shame, would it?!
What?!
Huh?
A million yen?!
Yes.
Who said that?!
It's written in this contract...
A million yen a month...
It's written like that.
You bastard!
You're going to pay me a million yen a month for hiring me?
Hamada Matatoshi...
Shut up! You're too old!
I'm Matatoshi!
Speak up!
You dirty bastard! You're under arrest!
You're the one who promoted Matatoshi!
You bastard!
If it wasn't for Konitan, Konitan wouldn't have come!
You bastard!
Who's going to do it today?
Me!
Who's going to do it today?
Can I not call my wife?
Why?
Are you alright?
Why can't you call your wife?
Alright, alright!
Wait, wait, wait!
I'll go in front of you.
I'll go in front of you, too.
You know...
What's he saying?
He's talking on TV.
Don't look up! Do it again!
Hurry up!
Are you going to stand there and do nothing?
Why can't you do it?
You treat people like that!
Why can't you do it?
Even after a battle,
Gotts A. Osaka still trains his nose every day.
You, too...
Today, we have a little announcement for the ending!
Yes! So, today...
Yes?
The video I made...
Yes, yes...
I will give it to everyone in the audience.
Ah, I see.
I always do rock-paper-scissors and give away presents, but...
Yes?
Today, this video...
Yes?
I will give it to only one person.
Oh!
I will give it away.
Also, for everyone watching TV...
Yes?
This is also a present for you.
I see.
Five of them.
Yes.
My telephone number, Matsubi...
It doesn't matter!
Matsubi, you're such a clumsy guy!
What do you mean "clumsy"?
The last one...
Clumsy...
What are you saying?
I will give you half of it.
Ah, I see.
Yes, so today...
This video...
Yes, everyone stand up!
I, Icore, will give it away!
That's good!
I,core will give it away!
Everyone, let's go to a more pleasant place!
I,core will give it away!
This program...
T & G...
Kirinri Barrage...
Nissin Foods...
Meiden...
Brought to you by Lotte.