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I'm not going to lie.
About what?
I don't tell lies.
If you think it's true, I don't like it.
What did you say?
I'll tell you what I said.
I went to a sushi restaurant.
I've never been there.
They were open until five in the morning.
It wasn't a good sushi restaurant.
But since it wasn't open, I happened to go in.
There were about five men.
I went in and there was a counter and a seat over here.
There were only men sitting at the counter.
They were wearing thick tank tops and drinking matcha.
Were they all men?
Most of them.
Some of them were wearing leather jackets.
I thought it was strange.
What do you mean?
Hard gay?
It was strange.
They were strangely clinging to each other.
They looked like a couple.
I wondered if it was because it was a sushi restaurant.
Why?
They were all wearing two layers.
I thought it was strange.
But it's okay.
They won't touch you.
They won't touch me.
But I was surprised.
I wanted to go in and out of the restaurant early.
There was a customer who asked me what I was holding.
I guess you use a lot of electricity.
When I did this...
It went out of control.
Shut up.
I didn't like it at first.
It's true.
Shut up.
I got there right away.
When I got there later, I didn't like it.
Suddenly, I saw a man with a skinhead.
I thought it was strange.
There was an employee.
He was hard of hearing.
I thought he wasn't Japanese.
I felt sorry for him.
I asked him where he was from.
He said he was from China.
I couldn't read his name.
I called him "Kyo."
He said "Good luck."
I said "Yes."
He said "You too!"
He said "You don't have to!"
No matter how "Kyo" you are.
He's been looking at me like that.
But...
I'm surprised.
I don't think there was any discomfort.
You too.
Oh, it's you, Mat-chan.
It's finally you, Mat-chan!
Well, I've been interested in "new house" lately.
Really?
What are you talking about?
You're not surprised, are you?
No, I'm not.
I'm really sorry.
My junior...
My younger brother...
It won't heal for the rest of his life.
What is it?
An accident.
Oh, I see.
Trauma.
Yeah.
Even when you're riding next to me...
Even if we pass each other like this...
Oh, are you okay?
Even if it's like this...
I remember it!
That's not how you say it.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Junior, are you okay? Junior, are you okay?
That's not how you say it.
Once in a while... "Whoa, whoa, whoa!"
And you know...
The other day, you know...
I was riding Junior Yoko and my cell phone...
Well, it wasn't working, but you know...
While I was driving...
Yamashita got mad at me again, you know...
Hey, you! Drive properly, you bastard!
I turned around and went "Gah!"
And I hit him!
Like a guardrail or something...
And I was like "Whoa!"
That's not how you say it!
It's okay! It doesn't hit like that! It doesn't hit like that!
I'll hit you first!
I found out later...
I was riding him like a guardrail or something...
And I hit him first and...
Beriberiberiberi!
And all of my bumpers came off!
Beriberiberiberi!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
I didn't know he was going to hit me!
Beriberiberi!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
And I got out of the car and...
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
It's okay! It's okay!
It wasn't completely off, but...
Gah!
And it hit me!
Are you okay?
It doesn't matter, Junior!
And an overhand came up to me and...
These parts are also off!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
And I was like...
Who did that?
Junior!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
With those parts...
I'm used to it now!
I get it now!
He was chasing me for a while!
That's weird!
One by one...
Ah!
Then it's true!
What kind of 'ah' do you know, Geben?
Well...
All you said was 'ah'!
No, no...
I was surprised by your 'ah' too!
I thought you were surprised too!
But you said 'ah', 'ah', 'ah', 'ah'!
No, no...
It's true, isn't it?
It's true...
No, it's scary, isn't it?
And you know, even if you say it normally...
It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts!
Why?
You said 'oh man', didn't you?
You don't know anything, do you?
I don't know anything like that!
Why do you have such a painful angle?
I don't know what you're talking about!
I see...
That's it!
Really!
I want to poop too!
This is different...
This is a question for Matsumoto-san, who eats 7 unagi pies a day.
How erotic is ero-gappa?
Well, ero...ero-kirigiri or something like that doesn't exist, right?
Ero-inu or something like that doesn't exist.
It's a title attached only to kappa.
That's right.
Ero-gappa.
That's because most of kappa are extremely ero- inu.
Ah, is that so?
Yes.
There's a kappa-like person, right?
Who...who is it?
It's you!
It's you! You're the king of Shimoneda Kingdom!
Why are you laughing?
It's amazing, isn't it?
You like Shimoneda Monjo, don't you?
No, I don't like him.
There's a lot of people who misunderstand me, so I'd like to say this.
But people have an image of me that I like Shimoneda.
But it's a big mistake.
What?
"It's a big mistake"?
It's a big mistake!
I don't like Shimoneda at all!
It's not about you or me, it's about everyone.
Men like Shimoneda, don't they?
This is serious.
What do you mean?
What do you mean by "serious"?
Everyone around you is telling you Shimoneda with care.
Why?!
You idiot!
Because you like it.
Because you're so excited about Shimoneda,
you don't have a choice but to say, "Hama-chan, you should say Shimoneda more often today."
I said it today. I said it three times.
Ah, I'm so tired!
I can't be happy without saying it!
You idiot!
You're so excited about it!
No, I really like Shimoneda!
You.
But the kappa blood is flowing a little.
In that sense.
No, even a normal kappa is erotic.
How far has that erotic kappa gone?
That's amazing.
Ah, I see.
That erotic kappa.
What's so amazing about it?
Huh?
What's so amazing about it?
In any case, whatever it is...
...will you put it in?
He's blue.
You're really...
How old are you?
Of course I'll put it in, even if it's an automatic coin seller's coin.
It's already on the ground and you're worried about it?!
Now?!
I'll put it in...
...even in the parking lot's card holder.
Wow, that's difficult!
Like this.
Get used to it!
You'll get used to it!
I'll get used to it if I put it in first!
You'll get used to it!
Kappa is...
...the worst.
Kappa doesn't exist anymore, but they did exist in the past.
And Kappa can have sex.
And there are Kappa elders.
I think you're Kappa IV.
I think you're a quarter.
Oh, really?!
That's why you're erotic.
Amazing, isn't it?
Amazing, isn't it?!
No matter how you look at it...
...it's like you're wearing a mask or something like that, right?
That's funny.
That was funny.
When you're nude, how do you distinguish between angels and demons?
How do you distinguish between angels and demons?
I wanted to ask you that, too.
Right?!
There are many ways of doing it.
Can you tell me how to distinguish between angels and demons?
The easiest way to tell is...
...it's usually written on your jacket.
What jacket?
Your jacket.
What do you mean, "jacket"?
No, no, Kon-san, are you wearing a jacket?
You're wearing a jacket, aren't you?
I'm not!
What do you mean, "what"?
Then how do you distinguish between angels and demons?
Aren't you wearing a tights or something?
Am I wrong?!
Aren't you wearing a tights or something?!
You're really stupid!
That's what humans call "angels and demons" in their imagination.
Is that so?
Usually, it's obvious.
They're usually salarymen.
Really?
Of course.
And here we have "devils" with embroidery.
There are too many devils.
What's funny about it?
It's like hypocrisy.
Oh, I see.
Yeah.
I see.
Of course.
But it's hard to understand.
You can't do this.
Of course.
Especially if you're a devil.
What are you doing?
Of course.
That's how it is.
So you want me to tell you how you can tell right away.
Yes, yes, yes.
That's right.
Right?
Yes.
Devils...
For example, when they're marching...
No, I mean, when they're marching...
If you break it, you're in trouble!
Tell me how you can tell right away!
For example...
When they're marching...
Devils...
They march like...
But Satan...
He marches like...
No, no, no.
He marches from the forest.
So you want me to tell you how you can tell right away.
That's why you say, "Ah!"
Tell me how you can tell by their looks!
By their looks?!
Of course!
Um...
Usually, when they're wearing tights...
For example, they have something like this.
Right?
What's wrong with you?
When they're wearing tights, they have something like this.
That's why you can tell!
You know...
You're mistaken for Mushimakin!
Mushimakin!
If you say it like that, what kind of Mushimakin are you talking about?!
Well, that's true, but...
What are you talking about?!
The difference between your imagination and mine is...
That's Mushiba's thing!
It's like to scare children!
But it's easy to understand!
That's like a so-called ethnic costume!
Oh, is that so?
That's why Japanese people are wearing Japanese clothes, but it's not like that now.
Oh, of course!
That's how it will be passed on naturally.
Yes, of course.
That's why it's not like that now.
It's a business suit.
That's right, but...
But it's harder to distinguish.
That's what I'm asking you to tell me.
Well...
Most of them are ****, like Satan.
But that's also difficult...
That's difficult...
Why are they ****?
Well, it's not like that...
It doesn't matter if it's like that or not.
I'm the type of person who wants to have a number.
It's not like you want to wear something good.
That's right, that's right.
And demons are a little hard to distinguish.
But if you have two of them, it's okay.
That's the way of thinking.
It's like this, but it's completely different.
It's difficult...
Yes, it's difficult.
I see...
This is difficult.
However, if you combine the three of them, you can tell.
It's like rock-paper-scissors.
What do you mean, like rock-paper-scissors?
Satan says to the demon, "Hey, you..."
Satan says to the demon, "Hey, you... Stop it."
But the demon says...
Hey, you... Stop it.
But the demon says...
Hey, you... Stop it.
I heard that there are lyrics up to number ten in the song "den-den-mushimushi-kata-tsumuri".
Can you tell me about the lyrics up to number seven?
Do you know about number one and two?
Everyone knows about number one, but I don't know about number two.
"den-den-mushimushi-kata-tsumuri", where is your eyeball?
Hey, show me your brain, show me your eyeball.
Show me your head.
And number two is...
I don't know about number two.
Oh, you don't know about number two?
If you ask me, I might think "Oh, I see."
Oh, you do?
Can you tell me about number two?
In the end, it's a song about solving the mystery of "kata-tsumuri".
"den-den-mushimushi-kata-tsumuri", where is your eyeball?
And number two is...
"den-den-mushimushi-kata-tsumuri", where is your...
I can't think of anything.
"den-den-mushimushi-kata-tsumuri", where are your palms?
What?
"den-den-mushimushi-kata-tsumuri", where are your palms?
So, there are many songs up to number ten.
There are many songs, but I can't think of anything.
Oh, I see.
What about number seven?
Number seven is...
I can't think of anything about number eight and six.
Oh, I see.
I'm sorry about that, too.
Number seven is...
Where is your apartment?
I don't have any body parts anymore.
I see.
Where do you live?
I used to live somewhere before.
I see.
But I don't go there anymore.
I see.
Are you calling me?
I'm calling you.
I see.
That's not only number seven.
What will happen to number ten?
That's right.
Right?
I asked you about number seven.
That's right.
Number ten also has a song.
That's right.
What will happen to number ten?
What?
What will happen to number ten?
Let's put it in order.
Will you tell me?
I will.
Then tell me.
That's easy to understand.
That's right.
Right?
That's right.
Then tell me.
Where is your eyeball?
That's number one.
Just say it.
Your eyeball.
Your head.
Which one?
Your head.
Your head, yes.
Then where is your palm?
Is it number two?
Yes, it is.
It's number three.
Number three is a little different.
It's not different anymore.
It's a little different.
I wanted to change it around here.
Number three is "what time and where are you coming from?"
It's not "what about you?" It's "what about you?"
What?
What time and where are you coming from?
It's number three.
Get your horns out, do it, use your head.
That's enough!
Number four.
Number four is...
This is what surprises me!
You're surprised by number four?
Yes!
Number four is "what time and where are you coming from?"
Say it again!
Why?
Say it again! I haven't heard you say it yet!
Why haven't you heard me say it?
You're a really nasty guy!
Why do you have to say it yourself?
Right?
Listen to me!
You surprised me! I was surprised too!
When I saw number four, I said "you again?!"
Think about it!
Hey!
Think about it!
It changes from number five, doesn't it?
It changes from here...
Yes...
Until you go to the apartment...
That's a lie, isn't it?
Yes, it is.
The apartment is number seven.
Number four is...
Five or six?
It's five or six.
Yes.
Number five...
Tell me about number five.
This is also a lie.
What's wrong with you?
Don't go back there!
I'm not going back there!
Where is your seat?
What are you going to do with that seat?!
Mitsui Mitsubishi Sakura no no Kai!
It's completely like...
You're motivated, right?
You're motivated, right?!
Number 6
Huh?
Number 6
When I heard this...
Ah!
I thought I was done for!
Yeah!
Hey, stop it!
You scared me
Number 6, number 6
Denden, Mushimushi, Katatsumuri
Your...
Your apartment is...
Where is it?
O O O!
Is it true?!
After hearing that, where's your next apartment?!
Huh?
Number 6, number 6!
Number 6!
This is disgusting
You're really disgusting
You scared me!
You can't put it up there, can you? That elementary school's...
Where is your XXX?
MAMA! MAMA!
The Education Committee will remove your horns.
Remove your horns!
So there's XXX, and where's the 7th apartment?
That's right! Where's the apartment?
8th, 9th, 10th. The last three.
That's right!
This one looks good.
Really?
I'll show you one.
Your...
Where is your love?
What's with that? It's disgusting!
What do you want me to do?!
It's like a heart.
So you want me to ask you about the course, about the horn, about the apartment...
And you want me to ask you about love?!
Love. "Where is your love?"
Where is it now?
Oh, I see.
Yeah, yeah, I know.
As a flow...
Um...
It happens.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
9th, 10th...
It's 9th, 10th.
The last one.
This is tough.
What should we do?
9th...
Yeah!
This one!
What?!
You scared me.
Seriously...
Den Den Mushi Mushi Katatsumori!
Hmm!
Omae no ruru rara!
Rara rura?
I don't know!
Hmmm! Hmmm! Hmmm!
Say it!
Rara ruh!
Say it!
I don't know!
You don't say anything!
Hmmm!
Yam Yami-chan!
I'll do it with a hammer.
I was surprised.
Well, you can do it with a hammer.
Say it, the last ten words.
Say it! If we don't end it here...
We can't end it.
What should we do?
Tell me the ten words.
What?
Tell me the ten words.
Is it okay?
Yes.
Tell me.
Is it really okay?
Go ahead.
Let's do it next time.
Yes.
Denden mushimushi.
Yes.
Right?
Katatsumori.
Yes.
Until now...
It's been as usual.
No, it's all like that.
What I wrote here is all like that.
I'm surprised.
You've been saying "eh" all along.
Denden mushimushi.
Katatsumori.
Right?
Yes.
Fly away.
What?
What is it?
You said it in English!
Didn't you survive?