AISubs v3.5
It hurts.
It hurts, doesn't it?
It's English. If you don't change your clothes, you can't change your English.
I don't change my English.
What time is it?
It's 2 o'clock.
That's amazing.
It's about 2 hours.
It's about 2 and a half hours.
It's fine if it's just 5 minutes.
Thank you for the food.
My wife is changing.
What's wrong with you today?
What's wrong with you all of a sudden?
It's hot!
This is...
Oh, this is...
This is a problem, right?
That's right.
Let's go!
It's hot, isn't it?
It's hot, really.
Why is it like this?
Watch out, watch out, watch out!
Watch out, watch out!
Watch out, watch out, watch out!
This is really bad.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Today's weather is really hot.
It's hot.
It's really hot.
The stage is small and it's hot.
No, it's not about the stage.
It's about the ring.
Let me do it.
It's like you're doing it.
Wait a minute!
I won't let you do it like that.
It's serious.
Don't make fun of me!
No, no, no, no, no!
No, you can't do that!
How many times have you done this?
I think I've done this about five or six times.
Five or six times.
But I feel like it's okay.
No, it's like you're doing it.
It's like you're doing it.
No, no, no, it's like you're doing it.
My wife and I will definitely get excited.
What?
I mean, my wife and I will definitely get excited.
There's no doubt about it.
But will you get excited?
Of course.
To be honest, Yamazaki vs. Moriman is starting to sound like a skit now.
A skit?
It's not a skit.
But...
I don't feel good about this.
It's not like you're getting your wife or kids involved in this.
I'm sure you can figure it out.
If you can figure it out, it'd be nice for you, wouldn't it, Sugawa-san?
Well, I...
Sugawa-san!
What is it?!
I don't have feelings for you, Yamazaki-san.
Sugawa-san!
[The Death Match]
We will now begin...
Itao vs. Yome, the death match of the century.
I'm getting nervous.
I'm getting jealous.
I'm getting excited.
From the depths of hell...
We can hear his footsteps.
Who are you calling?
From the blue rocks of Daniiwa...
Itao!
It's not like you're getting your wife or kids involved in this.
From the blue rocks of Daniiwa...
It was you, wasn't it?
We will now begin...
Yome vs. Yome, the death match of the century.
She is a reverse scorpion woman from South America, Yome's new girlfriend!
Why is there so many Yamadas?
Yamada is a judge.
Judge?
What does that mean?
I forgot to ask you, but I have something I'd like you to do for me.
What is it?
I think American TV has been filming this show for a while now.
It's a big hit.
The instruments are big.
They're popular.
They make goods.
The president is selling well.
You made it yourself?
I just wanted to say that.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You're exaggerating.
I'm grateful to meet Takeno Tsukai.
Africa will make big money.
I'm honored to meet members of Takeno Tsukai.
Today, I brought goods from our company, which is a big hit in Africa, to you all.
Please have a look.
You can say it.
It's hard to say.
Wow!
You're just putting stickers on it.
It's like...
It's amazing.
I can't catch up with you.
What? Why?
It doesn't matter.
Oh, can I say something?
I'm sorry.
We're a combination of two.
It's a combination of two.
It's not a combination of two.
It's a big money.
Wow!
It's making a lot of money.
No, no, no, no, no.
This is a little different.
I'm very old-fashioned.
I'm old-fashioned.
You're young.
Why did you say "it's a big money"?
Africa will make big money.
It's making a lot of money in Africa.
No, it's not like that.
You're good at manzai, aren't you?
What?
He said "You're good at manzai, aren't you?"
What?
You're good at manzai, aren't you?
What?
You're good at manzai, aren't you?
Let's start with the first match.
The first match is...
"Hot Water Match"!
Both teams will pour boiling water on each other and the one who gives up will lose.
- We did this before, right? - Yeah.
It was 100℃ boiling water.
- 100℃? - Isn't it too hot?
- You can take it out. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's really hot, isn't it?
- Eh, if you boil it like this... - It's really hot.
It's too hot, isn't it?
- It's fast. - It's fast.
- Eh? - You just put it in.
It's not boiling at all!
Ah, it's just the finger.
- Ah, it's just the finger. - Oh!
What are you saying?
No, what are you saying?
Oh!
- No, no, no. - You're making a mistake!
The first "oh" is...
What's with you?
Everyone is afraid of boiling water, so...
I'll pour some hot water.
- Will it fly like that? - Yeah.
- It's hot. - It's not boiling.
- It's smoking.
- What's that? - I don't know.
- It's over there. - Oh!
- It's a designated level, right? - It's not boiling.
- It's not boiling in the mountains! - Yeah.
One, two, three, four, five, six...
- Five, six... It's 3,000 yen, Mr. Suga! - Eh?
- 3,000 yen!
- Eh? - Eh?
You're wrinkled up now, right?
Your neck is broken, too.
- Eh? - What's he talking about?
- He's saying it from the beginning! - It's 3,000 yen, right?
- Excuse me. - Excuse me.
- No, you can't. - No, you can't.
- I think you should stop. - No, you should stop.
- You should stop. - You should stop.
- The temperature of the water will go down. - Ah, I see.
- Excuse me. - I'm sorry.
- You're fast. - You're fast, Mr. Red.
Thank you for watching until the end.
Thank you for waiting.
Let's start the match.
Hot water battle, start!
- It looks hot. - Yes, it is.
- It's hot. - It's not hot.
- It's 100 degrees water. - It's water.
- It's hot. - It's hot.
- It's not hot. - It's not hot.
- It's 100 degrees water. - It's hot.
It's hot.
What is this?
- The next match is... - Is it over?
- Oh, it's okay.
It didn't affect me at all.
What is this?
Poisonous ant repellent match.
- This is dangerous. - Let's not do it.
I'm going to use a real poisonous ant repellent.
If it comes flying at you,
please drink this.
It will help you recover.
It's okay.
- Recover? - Yes.
Please drink it first.
- It didn't affect me at all. - Yes.
That's good.
Thank you.
But insurance is like that.
- Even if you don't do it yourself, you can get insurance. - That's true.
- He drank a lot of it. - I don't want it anymore.
It's good for you.
It's good for you, so drink it.
I'm sorry, it's 6,000 yen.
I don't need it.
6,000 yen...
Tell me before you drink it.
Before you drink it, you know...
You know how Kansai people say "what a waste"?
What do you mean?
Tell me before you drink it!
One person, 1,000 yen. It doesn't even have vitamin C in it.
I don't need vitamin C.
7!
Vitamin C isn't that expensive.
Let's begin...
Poisonous Sniffing Competition...
Start!
It stings a little.
It's not that bad.
What?
It's not coming out.
Is it coming out?
It's not coming out.
If you blow it once, it doesn't come out.
Is it continuous?
What is this?
I don't know.
It's a board.
It stung you, didn't it?
I'm sorry.
The next competition is...
Are you okay?
Poisonous...
Poisonous Sniffing Competition...
Start!
Watch out! Watch out!
Is there a hole in it?
I think so.
Poisonous Sniffing!
The winner is...
Poisonous Sniffing!
Start!
Poisonous Sniffing!
What's wrong?
Hey!
What's wrong? Hey!
Read it!
What's your name?
I'm dead.
Why?
Wait a minute.
It's your fault.
This happened because the TV wanted a dramatic, dramatic, dramatic death for their wives.
What's wrong with you?
They turned us into a carriage of the entertainment world.
I thought you were dead.
For now, this is what I had prepared.
What did you prepare?
It ended before I could use it.
Wow, that's amazing.
514,000,000 yen.
The rest 75,000,000 yen.
The desk and all that stuff.
513,000,000 yen.
That's how much we owe you.
No, we're happy with what we've done.
Yes, we've given up too.
Please do something about this.
I don't want a wife.
You don't want a wife?
Why don't you think about it?
Yes, I'll think about it.
I'll leave it up to you.
You'll think about it?
Yes.
I'm sorry.
I'll leave it up to you.
Halloween.
Halloween?
Mom's dead.
I'm sorry.
I'll wait for a good reply.
A good reply?
Please.
She's not dead.
What are you going to do, wife?
She's not dead.
What are you going to do, wife?
She's not dead.
- What's this? - It moved. - It moved. - It moved completely. - It moved, but it laughed.
- Hey, Yamada, you love Shinnegae, don't you? - I love you, Yamada!
- Welcome, Yamada and Kusuribako! - Wehehaho! - Wehehaho! - Yeeha! - Yeeha! - Yeeha! - Yeeha! - Yeeha! - Yeeha!
- It's so small! - Yeeha!
- What can I say? - What can you say?
- I don't think you're energetic. - No, no, you're not bad.
- I don't like you at all. - You shouldn't say that.
- It's a lie to say we'll meet again someday, right? - I'm sorry. - I don't want to hear that kind of lie. - I'm sorry.
- Well, you've just had three shots and you're still breathing. - I'm not breathing, but I've had about three shots.
- I know you're getting carried away, but if you do too many impersonations, I'll...
- You're crazy! - I know, right? - You're crazy!
- You won't get carried away with just three shots. - But when you came out, you had a smug look on your face.
- No, I was just... - You had that "look at me, I've had three shots" look on your face.
- Well, think about it! Think about it! - Think about it.
- It's been 20 years. - What is it? - The duo. - Oh, right, right.
- It's been 20 years! I joined when I was 18. - Yes, yes.
- And when I thought about it, downtown Matsumoto was more than just Matsumoto. - Oh, I see.
- What?!
- How can you be so moved like that?
- Anyone in their 20s? Raise your hands quickly.
- We've been working together since we were born!
- For 20 years!
- In 3 years, we've been working together for 17 years!
- It's amazing!
- I know! - What do you know?
- Just by looking at your face today... - Oh, your dull face.
- Your dull face.
- "Ah, I feel like bragging about my dull face today."
- "Well, I guess I did brag about it a little."
- After so many shocking encounters,
- I have a question for you, Matsumoto-san, who has built up your current personality.
- In your life, you've met a little devil twice.
- What was he like, and when did you meet him?
- That surprised me.
- You've met him twice!
- Even if he's a little devil, he doesn't look small.
- How big is he? - Well, his clothes are a little small.
- How do you know that? - Well, it's pretty tight.
- The jacket also opens up in the middle. - What's a jacket?
- It's usually up to here. - The sleeves? - Yes, the sleeves.
- But it goes up to about here. It comes up as soon as you talk.
- It's like a dumpling here.
- There was a guy who made a hole here and put his finger through it.
- It was really tight and it opened up in the middle and you could see his back.
- Does he do bad things? - No, he's just a little devil.
- I see. - Yes.
- Originally, you start as a little devil. - Before you become a devil? - Yes.
- You want to become a devil as soon as possible. - I see.
- It's not a big deal in terms of strength. - That's right.
- You have to work hard from now on. - I see.
- He's still training. - I see. - That's why he's wearing his old one.
- His old one? - Yes, it's his old one.
- It said "takeuchi" on it.
- But you're wearing your own jacket. - I can't use my own properly.
- You can measure it when you become an adult.
- It's like a uniform. - That's right.
- They call it "ono".
- Where did you see it? - In the fridge.
- You didn't touch it, right? You just saw it.
- In the fridge? - Yes.
- You had a reason for being in the fridge, didn't you? - I did.
- If you were a little devil, it would be a mess. - Yes, if you found it.
- When a car comes and you hit a big rock, it would fall and you would be like...
- You would laugh like that, right? - Yes.
- You would laugh like that. - Yes.
- You found it in the fridge, didn't you? - Yes, I did.
- Did you do something to it? - I know.
- Well, you are a little devil. - I don't have a driver's license yet.
- What did you do? - Well...
- I made a noise like...
- I made a noise like this.
- At first, I thought it was a fridge switch.
- I made a noise like...
- It was doing like this.
- Yes.
- I turned off the outlet. - Yes.
- I thought it was strange and said...
- "Come on!"
- "It hurts!"
- "Did you catch it?" - "Yes, I did."
- "It hurts!"
- "Help me!" I said.
- Did you get scared? - No, I wasn't scared.
- You said "come on" like this. - Yes.
- "You can't catch it, can you?" - Yes.
- "You can't catch it, can you?!" - Yes.
- Like this.
- What do you think we are?!
- But it's strange that people can't catch it.
- I see. - Because we are devils.
- Yes.
- When did you want to quit? - Before I found you in the fridge. - Oh, I see.
- Can you quit from next week? - When I found you in the fridge, I felt like you were making a joke. - Oh, I see.
- Why couldn't you quit? Why couldn't you stop me? - Well, I wanted to do something behind the fridge. - Yes.
- To be honest, I thought you would laugh a little more. - Yes. - But you were a little weak. - Yes.
- I thought you were weak and I thought you were weak. - Yes. - But you were about to show your face. - Yes.
- I thought you were weak and I thought you were weak. - Yes.
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