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(Gavel banging)
We will now begin the second round of fair and square trial.
(Gavel banging)
Please enter your case.
Next defendant, please enter your case.
Defendant Saito Toshihide.
Not only as a chief director of "Gaki no Tsukai",
but also as one of the world's best lawyers, he has created a lot of laughter.
However, his true nature is to frighten, scare, and lie.
He is a very thin-skinned person, and he has caused a lot of trouble for people.
Therefore, the trial of "thin-skinned lawyer" has been adjourned, and he has received a guilty verdict.
However, it seems that he still has not shown any signs of repentance.
This time, he will once again be put on trial.
We will now begin the second round of fair and square trial.
Excuse me for a moment!
Yes?
Um...
I would like to declare that there will be a second round of "thin-skinned lawyer" trial.
Is that so?
I wanted to say that before.
Chief director of "Tsukai"...
Yes, and actually, I came here by bus today as well.
(Laughter)
The third round of "thin-skinned lawyer" trial has been adjourned.
However, this time, the second round of "fair and square trial" will be resumed.
This program is brought to you by the following sponsors.
Prosecutor Hamada, please submit your evidence.
Yes! Well, just like last time...
...we're making a VTR of all kinds of bad things about Heippon.
Yes.
First, please watch this.
Heippon's VTR Rehearsal
This is a rehearsal of a local program directed by Heippon.
Yes, I'd like to start the rehearsal.
Mr. Shomei, are you ready?
I'm ready at any time.
Then we'll start the rehearsal.
First, we'll have two MCs.
And then...
The rehearsal is going well, but then...
I'm late again! I'm sorry!
But all of a sudden...
What is this dark light?!
I can't record on TV like this!
That's why the audience is always minors!
Who's in charge of the lights?!
It's Heippon, who's angry at the darkness of the lights.
Is it you?!
Why is the light so dark?!
No, it's always the same...
That's not true!
My eyes are not blind!
It's dark! It's pitch black!
Heippon gets even more angry.
And then one of the ADs says...
Um, Saito-san?
Your sunglasses...
What?!
Sunglasses?!
What?!
Ah!
It's so bright!
It turns out that Heippon was so angry at the darkness of the lights that he took off his sunglasses.
Yes, yes, yes! Shall we go to the scene?!
That's the worst sound.
Your Honor, we have a witness for this case.
Understood.
Witnesses, please come forward.
Takamura, Yoshinobu as well.
Well, A.D. found the sunglasses and he knew about it.
But as usual, he laughed and fooled us.
He didn't apologize at all.
But Mr. Shomei was a little angry.
I don't think so.
We apologized and he said, "These sunglasses were expensive."
What's that?
I don't know what you're talking about.
This is the second trial.
Don't mess with me.
Well, first of all...
What I want to say is...
You shouldn't wear sunglasses like this.
You're not a talent.
You don't have a face.
You're not a celebrity.
But you're ugly and small.
You're ugly and small.
He has a reaction.
This local song was recorded in Alta.
And there's a young girl down there.
And she stabs me in the face.
What?
You're ugly!
And it's annoying.
Do you have sunglasses like this?
It's annoying.
It's true.
But as Yoshino said...
If you realize you're wearing sunglasses and you realize you're wrong...
You should apologize and say, "I'm sorry. I forgot."
As I said in the last trial...
You shouldn't change what the director said.
You're completely wrong.
You're wrong as a person.
That's true!
Let's watch the next video.
One day, the staff came to the cabaret club for a program launch.
Talent Tetsuro Degawa was also there.
Then, the staff said...
Talents are our treasure, aren't they?
Without them, we can't make programs.
Talents are our staff.
No, no, that's not true!
I'm ready to do anything for you, talent.
Don't worry about me.
For some reason, Degawa said his own talent theory hotly.
Then, the launch ended and Ichido left the store.
Come on, Degawa-san, this way.
At that moment...
Oh, Degawa-san!
It's true, it's Degawa!
Hey, Degawa is here!
What a surprise! Young people with bad taste got involved with Degawa.
Let's do something!
Hey, you guys! Do as I say!
Degawa was in a pinch, but...
Shut up! Don't you dare!
Young people tried to stop Degawa, but...
Help me!
Degawa was in a pinch, but the staff tried their best to stop Degawa.
But at that moment...
Hey! Hey, taxi! Taxi!
What a surprise!
Degawa stopped a taxi and was about to go back to the hotel.
Really?
Huh? A violent incident is happening! The city at night is scary!
No, it's really terrible, Saito-san!
After that incident, I asked Yamada-kun of A.D. about the truth.
Yamada-kun tried to help me, but Saito-san stopped me and...
Don't get involved! Let's run away!
That's what he said. And then he got in a taxi and ran away by himself.
That's really embarrassing for that person.
And there's one more thing that I think all of you, the talent, are suffering from.
When you go to an erotic bar, even though you want to go there yourself, you use the name of the talent and say "I want to go there myself", and we get in trouble.
So if you really want to go, please go by yourself with your own money! I'm begging you!
Do you admit to this fact?
I admit to this fact.
You're the worst! You're the worst!
Why are you laughing? Even though you did this?
What do you mean? Is there a reason?
Let me ask you!
Because you're scary!
You're the worst!
Listen, Taishi! When I stopped the taxi, did I stop it so that I could put you in the taxi as soon as possible?
If you do something like that, those scary people will come after you!
Do you know what you're saying?
I know!
You're just cutting off their tails!
This is what Happo said when he went to Osaka.
Yes, yes, yes!
Yes, yes! I've come to Osaka!
Do you know that there is a good cabaret club in Osaka?
I heard about it, and I heard that the number one there is really cute!
Eh, is it true?
After all, a director has to date a good woman!
Everyone, let's go!
Happo, who has long wanted to make a girlfriend in Osaka,
As soon as he entered the store, he called for a girlfriend he was looking for.
Number one! Please!
And the woman who received the mission sits next to him.
I'm Saito, a waiter who came from Tokyo.
As expected of number one, you're cute!
I come to Osaka twice a month, so please continue to support me!
Happo really liked her, but after a while...
Ai-chan, you have a mission!
I'm sorry, I got called.
She was a popular woman, so she immediately left her seat.
Then, Happo...
Number one! Please!
Immediately called for a girlfriend.
I can only be number one!
Ah, will she come soon?
Sorry for the wait!
Ah, thank you for earlier.
I'm Saito, a waiter who came from Tokyo.
I come to Osaka twice a month, so...
Um, Ai-chan's cell phone number...
Ai-chan, you have a mission!
Ah, I'm sorry, I got called again!
Oh my, again?
Just like me, you're really busy!
Saito-san, shouldn't you call for someone else?
What are you saying?!
Even in Tokyo, I'm only number one!
Number two isn't enough for me!
I'm sorry!
Number one! Please!
Happo left her seat, called for her again, and repeated her mission over and over again.
But behind all of that...
Ai-chan, that customer is calling for you again.
What?! Again?! This is the fifth time already! You're so persistent!
In the end, Heipo didn't even realize that she was being harassed, and repeated her mission over and over again for hours.
Give me your number, please!
The witness...
Understood.
Witness, please come in.
Well...
I go to Osaka once every two weeks for work.
And at that time, I heard that I was going to enter a shop and asked who was number one.
And... well, I came.
And at that point, I was like, "I'm here, I'm here, I'm here!"
Wait a minute! Why are you all so good at impersonating Heipo?!
You're all good at it, aren't you?
If you can do that, why don't you become a staff member?!
I was so loud that you could hear me around me.
And when I called for her and stood up...
You know how they say "it hurt more" and "it was fun" and stuff like that.
But I guess they just take it for granted and repeat it over and over again.
So when we look at it from the outside, we can clearly see that she's pulling on him about the third time.
Yeah, you're right.
Is he misunderstanding something?
I don't know, but...
Your Honor...
Yes?
Don't you notice that she's pulling on you?
No, she's not pulling on me.
Are you just pointing out things like that?
You know how they say "it hurts more"?
"It hurts more"...
In that sense, I don't think she's pulling on you.
Where do you get your confidence from?
"It hurts more" is fine.
It's more obvious than "number one".
But "it hurts more" isn't fun.
You don't like "it hurts more"?
I used to go there a lot when I was in my 20s.
About twice a week.
That's a lot of times.
At that time...
It was more than piano lessons.
It's really not funny.
It's not funny at all.
This is what happened when A-Pong and Suga went to the wind tribe a few years ago.
Yes, yes, yes, I feel refreshed.
The wind tribe is great!
I'm going to work hard and play with cute girls.
I'm going to become a doctor or a cook.
Right, girls?
Yeah.
But today's girls were cute.
I didn't think about it and gave them my name.
What? You gave me your name card?
What are you doing?
A name card is not only for individuals.
It is sacred as a journalist.
You can't give it away.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Recently, directors are becoming more and more like businessmen.
Please behave politely.
And the next week...
Ah, you did a good job today.
Girls, let's go play.
When it comes to Hei Pou's games, of course, he is rich.
The two who got a job came to a rich store.
Welcome.
Customers, are you going home for work?
Yes.
What kind of work do you do?
It's a TV relationship.
Wow, it's cool.
Then do you know this person?
He seems to be quite famous.
What was given out in front of me was Hei Pou's name card.
While saying such a great thing,
Hei Pou was distributing name cards in various stores.
My name is Saito.
Director Saito, please appoint a witness.
Understood. Please appoint a witness.
This is a manga.
This is the current VTR.
This is Suga.
I'm also pretty uncool.
This is not the current VTR, but...
The name card incident.
It's just like that.
Really...
He's not a journalist!
He said, "That's why you're not in charge of the director's team."
If you say it like that, you're being greedy!
I said, "I'm sorry, but when I went there yesterday,"
I saw your name card. What's going on?
He said, "First of all, it's important to put it in."
He put his name card in a windfall.
He's the worst.
I don't know what you're talking about!
What's your reaction?
People's stories make you angry, don't they?
So I don't want them to be like that.
Especially around me.
You're giving it to people for free, aren't you?
You want to keep it forever, don't you?
He says it with a happy face.
It made me really angry.
I said, "Why are you giving me a name card?"
But if you're giving it out, you know what it means, don't you?
It's cute, isn't it?
It's strange, isn't it?
When we first started, you said, "Let's go to Seikan."
You said you didn't feel like riding it.
But as soon as you closed the door, it made a sound like a pink rotor.
Go ahead!
Seikan
One night, Heippo was walking around drinking alcohol.
♪ Tokyo Boogie Woogie ♪
♪ My heart is excited, Heippo ♪
Then...
Ow!
Who is playing with me like this?!
I'm sorry!
Where do you think you're going?! I'm Hei Pou, a servant of a kid!
What are you going to do if I get hurt?! I don't like this at all!
As soon as he realized that he was weaker than himself, Hei Pou, who had become like a thief, left the scene without realizing that he had tried to kill him.
And the next day, Hei Pou received a phone call...
Hello! This is Saito!
Oh! So you're Saito, a servant of a kid!
Yes! Can I help you with anything?
It seems like you helped me a lot last night!
Huh? Last night?
Aaaaah!
I'm going over there now and I'm going to make you pay for it! Just you wait!
Huh?! No... please don't!
Suddenly, Hei Pou appears on the threatening phone call.
Hey, Hei Pou! What's wrong?
Gas! I'm in trouble!
Hei Pou explains everything to Suga and Suga says...
Hei Pou, it's okay! If you don't think it's wrong, you should have said it loud and clear!
Aaaaah! Right now, I'm Suga's best friend!
Huh?!
As expected, Hei Pou, who couldn't respond at all, suddenly pushed his phone to Suga.
Here, Suga says...
Hey, if you're going to call me like that, don't just stand there! If you're coming, please come!
It doesn't matter if it's now or later!
Aaaaah! Gas! If you say something like that, I'll really come!
What are you going to do?!
And then, Hei Pou...
Excuse me.
Please knock at least.
Hei Pou, who screams and gets scared of even the slightest noise,
called out Suga and Kobayashi and asked them to go out as bodyguards for three days and two nights.
You've done something stupid, haven't you?!
Your Honor, I'll tell you one more thing.
Witnesses, please come forward.
Now, Kobayashi has also appeared in the movie.
Yes, yes, yes.
Suga and Kobayashi were also there.
As bodyguards.
Yes, yes, yes.
These two.
Now, what do you think?
He was like an older brother, but...
Otomo, who was an AD at the time,
would go up to Hei Pou in the editing room and say, "Excuse me," and bring him some tea.
"What are you doing?!" he'd say.
"What kind of education do you get from your parents?!" he'd say.
"Knock first!" he'd say.
The next time he knocked, he knocked again and said, "What are you knocking for?!"
There's no way he'd come all the way to the office.
He was scared of noise.
He heard a noise and thought, "Someone's here."
That day, me and Kobayashi were driving to the office.
Then he said, "I'm scared, I'm really scared, so please stay with me," and said, "Let's go get a drink."
Well, it can't be helped, so me and Kobayashi said, "Anyway, let's drink and get a taxi and go home," and went to get a drink.
Then, me and Kobayashi were drinking a toast, and then he was silent for about thirty minutes and said, "Phew, whew,"
so me and Kobayashi said, "Whatever, let's just drink," and then suddenly, like in the previous part, he grabbed me by the head and said, "You idiot, damn you!"
So me and Kobayashi said, "Let's go home," and said, "Are you okay?" and he said, "No, I'll definitely attack you," and forcibly took me to a capsule hotel in Akasaka.
So me and Kobayashi said, "No, just in case you come, I'll go to the middle of the bed, so you and Kobayashi can surround me and sleep there."
I was really, really scared.
Did you say a lot of things to the opponent you bumped into?
Yes, I did. He was a weak opponent of mine, so I thought I could win against him, so I said a lot of things.
So you just kept apologizing to him?
I just kept apologizing to him.
So what did you do in the end?
After that, Kobayashi was going to be pulled around, and for three days, I was going to be like, "Don't leave me alone!"
We were together for a long time, and of course I thought it would be bad if I didn't go home for four days, and I said, "I'm sorry, but I'm going home today," and Saito-san said, "Then I'll go home, too," and said, "I'll send you out of town," and Saito-san went to the nearest house and went home right away, but I said, "I'm sorry, but there are mysterious people around the house," "There is no car," "Could you look at me for a moment?"
I said, "Saito-san, are you okay?" "I'm fine," "Can I come in?" "Yes," and I was making a lot of noise, and I said, "What's wrong?" and I happened to see a dog passing by, and I said, "You're a dog," "Get out of Earth!"
Anyway, Chief of Staff, we actually found this guy who was calling us. Please come in.
Hey! Are you Saito of the Earth? Hey! You're my slave. Use me.
You're a big guy, so hit me! Hit me!
Yes, yes.
What is it?
Please forgive me!
Watch where you're putting your hands!
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
That's enough.
Please forgive me.
Your head is all messed up.
I'm scared!
Please come in.
What are you doing?
Don't do it!
Don't be so angry!
Defendant, plaintiff, witness, please come forward.
I would like to speak directly.
He is guilty!
That's right!
And about this crime, everyone is very angry!
Yes!
And about this crime, he was so pitiful that he couldn't even laugh at it.
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