AISubs v3.5
Ladies and gentlemen...
- What? It's not included in the ticket. - I thought it wasn't included in the ticket.
- In the back alley. - Yes.
I don't know if you've seen it or not, but the audience gets excited and hands us a laughing baton.
And we say "next, please" and run.
- It's a big deal. - There's no baton anywhere.
- It can't be helped. - Where did you go?
- You two. - What?
It's not for sale.
Then, it's weird, isn't it?
What you did earlier, like putting eggplant on...
- The one with purple on it. - Putting eggplant on it?
The color doesn't show!
This area is slightly weak.
Be careful.
- Is that so? - Yes, it is.
I wrote a video called "wood fire" and I didn't like it.
I gave it back and wrote something else and said "I got it" and came back and wrote it again.
When I looked at it, it was "wood fire".
- That's not it! You aimed for it! - I aimed for it!
I aimed for it and wrote "wood fire" but it's even more purple now!
- Do you react to such things? - When I call you and ask you to turn this way, you give me Royal Host.
- It's just time for dinner! - No, no, no!
- You're still mad! - No, no, no!
- It's not like that! - You're really weak, so be careful.
- You know what? You'd better stop watching baseball before the show starts. - I can't help it. - Why not? - Why do you have to watch it all the time? - I'm already losing. "Giant" was losing. - Do you know the origin of baseball? - What is it? - It's either or. Baseball comes from a poop. Do you know it? - The "ya" of "baseball" is "ya" of "logson". - Where is it? - No, no, no! - No, seriously! - Yes, yes, yes! - You said "ya"! - "Ya"! - "Ya"! - "Ya"! - "Ya"! - "Ya"!
- Yes, it did. - So you... you've seen a runner getting pinched, haven't you? - Yes, I have. - And he was trying to poop here like "ya"! - "Ya"! - "Ya"! - The runner of baseball is like this! - But he was trying to poop like "ya"! - Do you know it? - No, I don't. - So you'd better not be mad at baseball, but you'd better not think of it as a poop game... - No, it doesn't matter, it's not a poop game.
- It's not a poop game now. - So, you know... you're mad because you tried to poop on your head.
- Director... - What? - You're mad because you tried to poop on your head and you're fighting like "ya"! - Oh, like a dangerous ball... - Yes, yes, yes.
- Well, if you could replace it in the past, you know? - That's right. - But it's not a poop game now. - Well, it's not a poop game now, but...
- But you're still pooping in that ball. - No, I'm not!
- I'm listening to what you're saying and what you're not saying. - You're so funny!
- Oh, well, it's different now. - Yes, I understand. Thank you very much.
- The other day, you and I were eating in the northwest. - Yes. - It was full of people there! - I see.
- And you and I were sitting like this around the corner and eating. - I see. - And I was right next to you. - I see.
- And you know, you can kind of see it like this, right? - Yes, yes. - This way. - Yes.
- It hasn't moved yet, but it's moving somehow. - Yes.
- And I looked at it and there was a huge cockroach right here! - Now? - Yes! - Yes.
Hey! Hey!
"Aaaah!" "Help me! Help me! Help me!"
"You're an unidentified beast!" "Aaaah!"
I panicked so much.
I panicked!
- You're scary. - Well, I can't help it. - You don't like it, do you? - I don't like it.
- Well, you're a man, so it's fine. - Yes. - It's not good for a woman you're with. - No, I said "Hey!" because I'm a man, but...
If I was with the woman I like or if I was staying here, I'd probably go "bang!"
But, you know, that woman has always been a little nicer than I thought.
"Aaaah!" "Help me! Help me!"
I don't want to see that ugly face of yours anymore!
It's not bad at all, but what kind of fate is this?
- "Is it okay?" - Well, fate doesn't really matter, but...
If you don't think you're lucky and you're not in a bad mood...
Sometimes, when I'm in a bad mood, I feel like I'm an ice man.
- There was a time when I felt like a car. - Yes. - And now I feel like an ice man.
- It's really like this in a square. - Now it's like ice coffee.
- And if you bend it like this, it will gradually melt and come out like this. - It's too cruel.
- But well, since you're in the middle of it, you can drink it quickly. - No, but you!
- I don't like it! While looking at the ice man! - But well... - Of course I don't like it!
- I told you that story, didn't I? A long time ago, I entered a mansion in Shinjuku.
- And I killed the top batter who was about to turn that mansion into a cockroach den.
- I opened the window of the mansion in Shinjuku. And when I looked outside of the window, I saw that the top batter had just put his hand on the other side of the window.
- And I was like "Nguaaah! Bang!" and that's how I protected that mansion.
- What if I was a defense over there? - Who are you?
- If I hadn't done it, that mansion would have been a mess by now. - I don't know who you are, but...
- You know, they know the truth, don't they? - Yes.
- You know, they say that their allies have been killed. - Oh, do they? - Yes, they do.
- One of them was like "bang! bang! bang!" and I was hitting it like "bang!" for only a week or something like that.
- And I found myself on top of the cabinet, and I was like "bang!" and I was like "bang!" and I was like "bang!" and I was like "bang!" on top of the cabinet...
- You're not supposed to look like that, you know? - With that glaring look of yours, you look like you're having a blast, you know?
- Hey, don't do that!
I only want one of Matsumoto Magic, so please tell me.
Please tell me about Matsumoto Magic.
I only want one of it. How many are there? I only want one of it, it says.
Well, there are four of them.
It's hard!
But still, it's enough for the general public to accept it.
I'm surprised.
It's amazing. "Why did it disappear?"
Eh, is it better for it to disappear?
Yes, it's better for it to disappear.
What's better?
Well, various things.
Do you have cigarettes?
Yes, we do. Please wait a moment.
If you don't have one, do you have one?
You can't do it, can you?
Yes, we do. We have one now.
Well, if you go out for a drink or something like that, do you always have cigarettes and lighter?
Of course we do.
Seven Stars...
You're wrong!
I think it's okay, Seven Stars.
You shouldn't have said that!
"Because we did Seven Stars." Say something!
No, no, Seven...
No, it's fine. Seven Stars is fine.
No, it's fine!
You always do it, don't you?
Then it's fine! It's Seven Stars!
Seven Stars is the best.
You're doing a good job.
What are you doing?
I'm waiting!
I'm not doing anything!
You look round!
What are you doing with your wrists?
I'm not doing anything!
You're turning your wrists!
You're trying to hide it!
Why are you moving like that?
Well, you don't have to turn your back too much.
There are seeds and stuff like that.
Are you ready?
This is so funny!
Blue, is he smoking?
What will happen if you say that?
What will happen?
You're not going to show seeds if you say that.
You're not trying to hide it!
I'm not, I'm not!
You're not trying to hide it!
Who are you asking?
I can't.
I'm sorry, I'm really sorry.
I'm really sorry.
I can't do it anymore.
What do you want to do?
Do you want to die?
Why is there a large and a small toilet in a common sense toilet?
That's what we're trying to say to people.
What are you talking about?
This is amazing.
You and me are in a toilet, but what you're about to do is...
Are you going to pee or take a shit?
Are you serious?
You know...
Today's guest is stupid.
You're stupid, too.
If you pull out all the hair and feathers of a flamingo, what will remain?
Nothing.
It's been months since you said that.
It happens sometimes.
Nothing remains.
Really?
What do you mean by "nothing remains"?
It's full of hair.
What? But you're going to pull out all the hair.
It's full of hair.
It's a lump of hair.
It's a bird formed of hair.
If you pull it out, will it remain?
It won't.
Even if you pull it out, it's still hair.
Why do you say that?
My hair is undone.
There is still nothing.
My hair is undone.
What? Are you kidding me?
You should've said "no".
If I had said "fwoah" next to the flamingos, would it be "fwoah" still?
It would be "fwoah", right?
There is a root in the nipple.
There isn't.
How do you know that?
If it's not right wing, it's wings. What's up with that?
Huh?
It's weird that there are only wings.
Yes, yes, Mr. Matsumoto.
Do you know about onions? Or even lettuce?
You don't know about that either.
Even if you combine flamingo and lettuce...
We need to know more about animals.
I like animals, so I did a lot of research.
I see.
For example, is there anything we know about animals?
Dogs don't have much fur around here, right?
Do you know why?
Dogs used to live like this.
They walked like this.
Do you understand?
So they don't have fur here.
They were sucking all the time.
They walked all the time.
It was a little annoying at one point.
Because it's hot.
Because of friction.
Because of the gravel road, it was a little tough.
It hurts.
So they used to walk like this.
If you walk like that, it hurts.
I know.
I know how you feel.
And in places like this...
The waist goes like this.
It's detailed.
The jaw goes like this.
So I raised the body a little.
The body?
The body, right?
Oh well.
Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday, dear Hachan.
Happy birthday to you.
I have a present for you.
What is it?
A present for you.
Give me a present every year.
I won't do it either.