AISubs v3.5
He's such an idiot.
An idiot?
Yeah.
Um...
Something happened.
I'm going on a date with an Australian today.
I'm in the car and I'm on the phone and...
Hello? Hello?
Loretta?
It's Loretta.
Loretta? Yeah.
It's me. It's me. Yeah.
Hosei-kun.
He's such an idiot.
Yeah.
He's such an idiot.
What should we do?
What should we talk about?
Yeah.
Right?
Huh?
No, no.
It's not like we're in a situation like that and you want me to sign you up.
Yeah.
It happens, doesn't it?
It does, it does, it does.
When I was rehearsing for the drama and I was at the diary shop...
That...
That lookalike...
Nodojiman or something like that...
That old woman was there!
One more time, one more time!
That old woman was there rehearsing for me like this!
No! Don't do it!
"Don't do it!" She said.
When I came out of the bathroom...
Ah, my daughter is worried...
Ah...
This is also the opposite...
Ah...
The old woman was holding me like this...
Could you sign me up now?
I asked her and she said...
Ah, wait, right now...
I can't do it right now!
She looked at me like...
What's wrong with you?
She looked at me like...
What's wrong with you?
No, no, you shouldn't say that...
Because I'm an old woman!
You don't say that much!
No, but since you're Nodojiman...
You should put your throat out!
No, no...
What are you two doing?
No, no...
You should sing it comfortably!
Well, if you are an amateur like me...
Maybe you should go and go around!
But in middle school...
At the basement of my house, in the baseball stadium...
When the police came...
Did you say that?
When the police came!
Did you say that?
I can't go out now.
You, run away!
You can't go out!
You're right!
No, but it's true.
When I was an amateur...
Can you see me walking?
Can you see me?
What are you doing?
In the middle of walking...
Just on this sidewalk...
Pei-san and Parco-san were walking.
No one was looking at me.
But you know...
It's like that.
When you're walking, it's hard for anyone.
Today, after the shooting...
When I came in the car...
You were in the car in front of me.
I don't know if you couldn't stand it...
But when I was getting in the car...
Wow! It's a beach!
I was in the car...
I was in the back of the car...
And when I came out of the car...
Wow! It's a beach!
You're just an old man!
You don't have a nose...
And you don't have a tongue!
You don't have a tongue!
No, I can't stand it.
It's hard for anyone.
It's hard, but...
I see.
I found a hobby.
I'll do it.
Star-looking seagull.
Star-looking seagull?
No, this is...
This seagull is...
It's a birthday seagull...
And I'm also...
Star-looking seagull?
Yes, I'm also a star-looking seagull.
I see.
I'm going to do it.
With my bare hands?
Of course, with my bare hands!
Morobos is a man!
No, you're going back to your hometown!
No, I look at the stars!
That's what you're trying to do with the telescope!
You're trying to buy a telescope!
No, no, no! I really look at the stars purely!
I look at the stars, and the stars are also looked at by stars!
(Laughter)
But I don't like looking at the stars alone like this!
No, no, no! And I've been thinking about it before!
Oh, really?
Not only looking at the stars, but also pressing them against the shutter!
Pressing against the shutter?!
Are you going to take pictures?!
Yes, yes, yes! I'm going to take pictures!
If you think about it like that, it's a lot of fun!
And once you've taken this picture, you're going to oil it up like this...
(Laughter)
Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh?
(Laughter)
You're going to paint while looking at the stars?
Yes, yes, yes! Oil it up!
Oil it up and paint it?
Yes, yes! You paint it!
Yes, yes!
And now you're going to sing an image song that goes with it!
(Laughter and applause)
That's a lot of work!
No, I'm going to do it with a great system!
Most of them are over there!
(Laughter)
Make sounds!
Yes!
And once you've done this, you've made this sound, so you're going to add lyrics to it...
Add!
Make it into a song!
And now my hobby is spreading all over the world!
(Laughter)
No, no, no!
Looking at it like this...
There's a big difference between you and me!
What do you mean?
For example, your looks...
(Laughter)
Your legs...
There's a lot of things, but there's a lot of differences!
Yes!
There's no difference at all!
Your legs!
Yes!
Do you know how long my legs are?!
(Laughter)
This is a surprisingly hidden part, but it's really long!
(Laughter)
No, this is a serious story.
You know...
A stylist asked me to measure my legs.
And I did it like this...
And the next day, I got a call...
Can you measure my cheeks?
There's no way.
(Laughter)
You're Japanese, aren't you?
And I came to measure my cheeks...
Ah... I knew it.
And it wasn't wrong.
Yeah, but you can't tell from the first glance!
No matter how you look at it, you're normal!
No, it's not like that at all.
You know...
I'm a blue man, more than you think.
(Laughter)
No, you're a blue man.
Ah, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I'm a blue man.
(Laughter)
So...
You can't really tell from this...
But if you lift up this...
(Laughter)
You can't tell at all.
No, you can't.
No, you really can't.
No way!
Let's end it here!
Let's end it!
Even if you lift up this...
Nothing will change!
No, no, no...
Try touching it!
What?!
Try touching it!
Wait a minute...
Don't do it like this!
(Laughter)
What is it?!
Try touching it!
Then try touching my...
(Laughter)
Why?!
But you can tell from the first glance!
No, it's fine!
(Laughter)
Look at it with your heart!
(Laughter)
I...
(Laughter)
Don't trust your eyes!
(Laughter)
Look at it with your heart!
My...
Look at it!
(Laughter)
Hurry up!
Hurry up and look at it!
My...
(Laughter)
I'm sorry.
(Laughter)
(Music)
But you shouldn't look for hobbies.
You can't do it forever like this.
(Laughter)
How about birdwatching?
No!
(Laughter)
What's so funny about it?!
You're an idiot.
(Laughter)
In the past...
No, it's not like that.
It's like a bird created by humans.
It was born in a human's body since it was born.
A wild bird is more...
It's not different at all!
It's not different.
It looks the same.
It's not different. It's rougher.
It might be rougher.
A wild bird's personality is messy.
It's crazy.
You can't tell just by looking at it.
I can't tell.
It's a messy personality.
Wow, it's a messy personality.
Well said.
Well said. A bird's past is abundant.
I know that.
A wild bird is a mess.
I don't care about it.
I'm always cautious.
I don't care about it.
Even if you talk to it?
I don't care about it if the world is a mess.
It's rough.
It kicks me.
I want to see it.
It kicks me hard.
But it's not a big deal.
Even if a bird kicks you, you get scared.
Last time, Mr. Matsumoto announced that the world's three biggest men are in front of you.
This time, please announce the world's three biggest sad things.
For example...
Of course, it's not in the top three, but...
Yes.
At home...
Right?
Even when you're watching TV...
When you lie down and look behind you...
And there's a shadow here...
What kind of probability is that?!
If you lie down and look behind you like you're in a dressing room and there's a shadow...
Of course!
What kind of probability is that?!
Whose shadow is it?!
Whose master is it?!
Of course I know!
If you lie down and look behind you like you're in a dressing room and there's a shadow...
Of course!
Of course I know!
And you know how you get a high fever when you're thirsty, right?
Yes, yes, yes...
And you're alone... Do you have to do it all by yourself?
Yes, there's that kind of sadness.
I know that!
There's that kind of thing, you know...
With a vacuum cleaner...
You vacuum like this with the vacuum cleaner, right?
And when you go like this and like that...
If the vacuum cleaner can't handle it, it goes like this!
Like this?
It's so sad!
Why?!
It's so sad!
It's amazing! You feel like you're responsible for it, don't you?!
Well, it's just one of your shadows, you know...
So what about the three biggest in the world?
The three biggest in the world...
That's what everyone wants to know.
Yes, yes, yes...
That's right.
We don't have anything like this in our house or in our room.
It's not even in the three biggest in the world.
It's not in the three biggest in the world.
It's the three biggest in the world, right?
Of course it is.
And of course...
Pizza's Chateau, right?
That's one thing you can say about it, right?
And of course...
Foie gras, right?
And of course...
James D.
You're crazy!
You're definitely crazy!
Matsumoto-san, why did you refuse to join the group?
Please tell me about it!
It seems like you've been talking about it a lot.
Well...
Um...
Komuro-san's way of inviting me is...
He invites me in such a nasty way...
Exposed!
Even if I'm alone, he'll ask me for my phone number...
What are you up to today?
What are you up to today?!
He'll always call me.
So I'm off every day.
Komuro, Komuro, you're really there, aren't you? You're really there, aren't you?
That's exactly what I wanted you to do!
Come on, I don't want you to turn me down, you know?
You know? So I thought about it for a moment.
So I told you to come and see me.
What's with the attitude?
So I said I'd come and see you. Komuro-san is fine, but...
You know, Mark's sexiness is terrible.
What did you do to me?!
Well, I went to eat first with Mark and...
Everyone in gloves.
In gloves.
So Mark was sitting in front of me, and it was amazing!
And I was really surprised when I looked at it.
Under the table, Mark was deliberately dropping his cork.
His hand!
"Oh, I dropped it," Mark said.
"Oh, it's dangerous, I'll pick it up," I said.
But Mark wasn't wearing it!
Mark was naked.
So I took it off.
I took it off at the same time, under the table.
I took it all off.
When did Mark become like that?
I don't know!
Everyone was happy about it!
His... my inner thighs were sticking out!
Komuro-san was like, "Oh no," and Mark was like, "He'll come in for sure," and I was like, "You know what I mean, right?"
Where was that?
What do you mean, "coming in for sure"?
In Komuro-san's office.
Pretending to make tea and coming in like this.
I bought it.