AISubs v3.5
Next time, we won't use kids, but we'll use staffs who can make beautiful girls fall in love with them!
Thank you for your hard work.
Today...
Well...
Well, as you said, we have mixed staffs.
I see.
Since we are businessmen, we should be very good at making girls fall in love with us.
Besides, we like girls.
We like girls and businessmen.
That's right.
So, today, I don't know how to say it...
For those of you who are watching on TV...
For men...
I see. We can't make girls fall in love with us like this.
It's like a model.
I see.
That's what we wanted to do for the opening.
I see, I see.
In that sense...
Yes?
The people sitting over there are...
Yes?
The staffs.
The sleeping lions.
However, Mammoo-san...
Yes?
The person in front of you is sleeping.
That's right.
This program is brought to you by these sponsors.
First, let's start with the hook part.
This is a date.
A date.
And we somehow...
Well...
We invite her for a tea.
We take her for a drink.
We go all the way.
And then...
Here is the last one.
She has to take her to her own room.
And there's a bed.
That's right.
Yes, this room is nothing but it's fine if you think of it as a second level.
Even if you bring it into the room, it's a problem until you come here.
It's probably impossible to come here all of a sudden.
It's fine if you do it like you usually do.
Then, Mr. Top Buster.
That's right. I was thinking of who to choose.
This is Mr. Yamazaki's senior.
I think it's best if you tell me about it.
Then, Mr. Top Buster, Mr. Yamazaki, let's go!
What are you doing?
I know it.
You don't know?
You don't know "down down"?
"Down down"?
You haven't seen that musical instrument?
You haven't seen it?
I have seen it, but I don't know it.
That "yeah, yeah, yeah" you were doing.
That's me.
Oh, is that so?
It's a little bitter to drink.
Just a little.
Put it down.
Go back!
Cut it out.
Don't look at me like that.
I'm not looking at you like that.
Shut up!
Let's go home.
I'm moving out.
W-why?
Really, there's nothing to worry about.
You don't have to worry about that at all.
Seriously.
It's a honorific.
Your honorific sounds like you're lying.
No, no, I'm serious.
There's nothing like it.
I'm serious.
Really?
Yeah.
Can I?
Just a little?
Yeah, just a little.
Alright!
One-shot game!
Look at this.
If you fly...
No!
What?
No!
What's wrong?
Don't say weird stuff like that.
I mean...
That's just how you look at me.
And then...
No! No!
Don't do anything.
I won't do anything.
Then go over there.
I'm drunk.
Why are you drunk?
All of a sudden...
Come here for a second.
Come here for a second, seriously.
What? What?
I won't do anything. I definitely won't do anything.
I won't do anything.
I'm leaving.
Why aren't you leaving?
You're the worst.
You're the worst!
You're not even good at this!
All right, then.
Yes.
You did your best.
Next up is...
Otomo.
Otomo, Otomo, Otomo.
Please come up to the stage.
Otomo.
Huh?
- Have we met before? - No.
- We have met somewhere. - No.
- No? - No.
Hey, can I have a cup of tea?
- Why? - Why? I don't know you.
Hey, it'll be over soon.
- What's over? - Hey, it'll be over soon.
Hey, you're laughing.
Hey, sit down.
My house is around here. Can you come over?
- What are you doing? - Huh?
- What are you doing? - No, no.
- I have something to do at home. - Then wait.
- I have something I want you to see. - You're being mean.
I have something I want you to see.
- You're being mean. Drink it. - No.
- There's this one. - Yes.
- Are you doing it alone? - Huh?
- Are you doing it alone? - Doing what?
- Are you doing it alone? - No, I'm not doing it alone.
- Are you not holding it? - I'm not holding it.
- Do you want to do it? - Yes.
- Right? - Yes, yes, yes.
- Show me your hand. - What?
- Can you see my hand? - Can you see it?
- Yes, I can see it.
- I see. - I see.
- What is it? - What is it?
- I see. - You're being mean.
- You're being mean. You're being really mean.
What do you think?
It's like...
an adult's mood.
I think...
it has more tempo.
- It's more flexible. - Yes.
- In that sense... - Yes.
Thank you.
Good morning.
What did you say?
- Thank you. - Thank you.
- Oscar. - No.
- This is special edition. - No.
- Not at all.
No.
- You're doing it, right? - Just a little.
- Right? - Yes.
I happened to talk about special edition.
- Special edition. - Yes.
Please sit.
Let's do a rock-paper-scissors kiss game.
- Why? - Why "for now"?
I don't want to do it.
Then let's play a game.
Why? I don't like games.
Wait a minute.
Oh, it's Hamada.
You're really bad at this.
Are you two friends?
I'm the one who raised you two.
You'll be my assistant, right?
Then go to my room.
Why?
Look at the calendar.
I forgot about it until tonight.
Let's go.
Thank you.
Let's go.
Why is there no calendar?
I don't know.
What is this?
It's fine.
It smells really good, doesn't it?
No, it doesn't.
Just a little.
No, it doesn't smell good.
Just a little.
I remember you a little bit.
You know them in Roppongi in their last merch?
I don't think so.
No? I'm just looking for their model.
I'm just an agent of the model.
So, what is your occupation?
I'm a model.
Model, really?!
I'd like to talk to you about a contract and just join an actor's world.
Okay.
Okay. Let's talk about it in the bar.
Okay.
Let's come in.
So, what is your name? May I have your name?
Lucy.
Lucy. Oh, Lucy. Yeah, Lucy.
So, where are you from?
I'm from Ireland.
Ireland?
Oh, that's cool.
Lucy, Lucy.
Yeah, cool, cool. And do you like...
It's not always cold.
Okay, last one.
He's the world's most parallel man.
Okay, let's go.
Hello.
Nice to meet you.
Where do you come from?
I come from Ireland.
Ireland?
Yeah.
Ireland?
Yeah.
I'm not... I'm... I'm not... I'm lonely.
Lonely?!
Drink, drink! Drink together!
Okay, just a small drink.
- Yes. - Small drink.
Okay.
Who are you talking to?!
You drink?
I'll have lemonade.
Lemonade?
- Your country? - Yes.
- I like America. - America?
- And Japan, of course. - Japan?
Japanese boy good?
Mmm...
- No? - I have a boyfriend.
You have a boyfriend?!
Your English is very good.
Very good? Thank you very much.
You are a student?
Yes, I'm a student.
- My room and near... - Oh, really?
You... together doing?
- Okay, okay. - Okay?!
You okay?!
Just a short time.
Please!
- I'm tired. - Please!
Please!
Thank you.
You can sit there.
Bed?
No.
Finish, stop.
You can get somebody else to do this.
What?!
Mr. Heiko, you've been tricked.
What is this?!
The worst!
Wow, you're so cool!
You can communicate, but you're making me angry!
Stop it!
Ah, it's sticky.
It's hot, isn't it?
It's hot, isn't it? I don't like it when it's sticky like this.
Anyway, for girls, it's still sticky, but...
This guy...
He's...
Well, for girls...
Well, there are mostly girls, but...
I don't know about girls, but...
No matter how painful it is for men,
This bag...
This...
It's close to my thighs.
This is...
And...
It's itchy.
It's itchy!
Sometimes, like this...
I can't wash it without rolling it up.
However, if I say one thing...
You're a trunks, aren't you?
Ah, I'm a trunks.
That's why it's sticky.
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha...
Ah...
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha...
Yes.
Briefs are quite packed.
It's not like that...
I'm not good at it, so...
It's sticky!
Right?
I think you're a trunks.
Right?
Yes.
I'm really...
I'm this kind of person...
It's sticky.
No, it's better like this.
Sticky?
Ah, yes.
That's what I remembered.
People of the trunks...
This part is sticky, isn't it?
If you wear a brief, you'll be wrapped up.
Even if you're a crook, you'll feel like...
Ah, it's stained! It's stained!
You'll feel like that, but...
You...
Are you an old man?
Ha-ha-ha-ha...
It's not stained!
Ha-ha-ha-ha...
It happens once in a while!
It's because you're not controlling your own body with your own will!
It's not like that!
It's sold out!
You can't do it!
It's not like that!
When you're wearing a jersey...
Like this...
When you do it like this...
Yes, yes, yes...
You think it's over, and...
The moment you loosen it...
Hmm...
The part that was lifted up...
If you lower it for a moment...
The residue will drip down...
Have you ever done it?
It's because there's no residue!
Because you're not controlling it!
There's no residue!
Sometimes, but...
The part that's lifted up...
When you do it like this...
Hmm, hmm, you bald man!
Hmm, you sound like a yakuza!
Do you know that...
Kim Pachi-sensei's...
Moe!
You know...
When you do it like this...
Hmm, hmm, you sound like a yakuza!
We went to the toilet yesterday..
So I was doing it like "pow" and it was over..
Next door.
But...
I'm right next to you and I say "is that it?!"
Not yet!
And then I went home.
Isn't that a bird's nest?!
What's that?!
A bird has a nest! A bird's nest!
Just leave it like that!
That's why!
Just leave it like that!
It hurts when you get caught! That's why you try to shake it and get it out!
No, of course not!
It comes out like that!
You don't shake it, do you?!
I don't shake it.
Also, you know...
How do you say it...
After all, there are people like me...
What are you saying?!
There are times when I end up like that.
What do you mean?
You know...
When I'm pooping...
I'm like...
Pooping...
And I'm like...
buri buri buri buri
Well, there's no one there...
buri buri buri buri
And if someone tries to come in...
For some reason...
I'm like...
Hiding my breath...
I know about that!
Why am I such a shrewd human being?!
Isn't that what everyone is like?!
Look at me! I'm hiding!
I'm like...
If it's now, I can do it in one go!
Yeah...
If it's now, I can do it in one go!
Ba-dum!
"Ba-dum!" And you come in!
And you're like...
The toilet paper is all tangled up...
And you're like...
You're like...
And you're doing that...
And you hate it!
When you're by yourself...
I'm...
Well, whatever! I'll stay here!
"Well, whatever! I'll stay here!" "Your attitude..."
"I'm saying it!"
I'm saying it!
And you come in!
Um...
I'm...
I'm... I'm...
My attitude's changed.
That's...
I know that!
But you know...
I'm like a man of the sea
I'm in love!
A man in love with another man
I want to wait for you to leave
What did you say?
I said I'm German and you should make me your disciple
I won't learn anything
You know, sometimes you have to put up with it for a while
What's with you, Tsukimura?
You put up a sign and said "Mr. Hamana!"
You're the worst!
Mr. Hamana!
I left my music behind!
Don't answer me! I can't help it!
I'm going to make you think differently!
"Oh!" I said and he didn't come down
"Oh, I got it!" I said and he left
Oh!
Oh, I got it!
Yes, yes, yes, but 24 hours has passed, haven't they?
Oh, yes, it has.
Are they recruiting people early?
I heard that a bunch of people are coming.
Oh, really?
They'll say "we don't have any more pay, so we quit" and they're gonna hire only people who they've worked with before.
Oh, really?
What can I do for you?!
It's good for you to say that, but...
In a way, it might be more tiring than flying a kite
Well, it's a different quality
And like flying a kite, if the camera would chase you for 24 hours and everyone would tell you to do your best
- That would be worth doing - Yeah, it would be worth doing
- But this is... - But this is...
We're doing something that won't work for anyone
- Even if you say "do your best", we won't say it - Even if you send a fax, we won't send it
What should we do about this?
No, who are you asking?
And since we're doing this together, if one of us... well, me too...
If you fell down...
What would you do?
No, I'd do like this
- Yeah, you'd stand up and do this - Yeah, yeah, yeah
- It'd be really hard - I would...
I would... well, even if you fell down, you know...
I could do an impersonation show
Anyone can do it
I'm really good at impersonating people
Doesn't it smell like cork?
You mean the croquette you make, Masao Sen?
No, the croquette I make, Masao Sen!
No, the croquette...
Oh, me! I've been doing impersonations for a while now.
The automatic sales machine at the transparent highway toll booth.
You mean the automatic discovery machine?
Yes.
It's weird, isn't it?
You press it, right? And you put it in.
Right?
It's very similar.
What about the toll?
What?
What are you doing?
What is the small window in the corner of the toilet door? Does it have any meaning?
Where is it?
In the old days, wasn't it around here?
It's not where the ventilation fan is not attached.
If it was a ventilator's smelly room...
Isn't it for ventilation?
It's not an industry.
But is it necessary?
I don't know.
You don't know?
What is it like?
Do you want me to tell you?
Well, well, well...
You can tell me.
At night...
Well...
At night...
Everyone in the house is asleep.
If you don't leave the window open...
The poop you were playing with outside...
Is that really enough?
Well, I guess it is.
What?
Well, I guess it is.
Why are you talking nonsense?
Don't say nonsense!
Don't make up nonsense!
Nobody thinks like that.
Let's study one by one like this.
You haven't reached the world of ghosts yet, have you?
Well, well...
One by one...
That's right.
That's right?
Yes, yes. I'll study it.
In the survey "Who do you think is the sexiest in the comedy world?"
I saw the magazine the other day and
Mazmossa was in first place.
How can you be sexy?
You forgot, didn't you?
How can you be sexy?
Well, um...
The audience who came here today...
Well...
About 85% of them are my fans, but...
No!
Well...
Well, if you're a fan, I think most of you have noticed it.
Well, since most of you have noticed it, I don't really want to say it, but...
While I'm talking with you like this, while I think you're focusing all of your nerves on me...
While I'm emphasizing "unagi"...
You haven't noticed it, have you?
Until now, you haven't noticed it, have you?
You haven't noticed it, have you?
I think you've noticed it, but the audience around you especially...
You just did it for the first time!
Happy birthday to you...
Masaki...
Happy birthday, dear Masaki...
Happy birthday to you...
No, thank goodness, there's a professional in there right now.
Ohohohoho!
Did I interrupt you?
Thank you very much.