AISubs v3.5
- Who's going to use it? - I'll give it away with my body.
- Good evening. - Good evening.
- Your opening is... - Yes.
- "Senshu". - It's a continuation of "Senshu".
- You did a great job. - Yes.
- And you know, it's not like I'm holding back. - Yeah, yeah.
- It's not like I'm holding back, but... - Yeah, yeah.
- Well, you know... I did it for 40 or 50 minutes. - You did it for 50 minutes.
- Yeah, and you know, every episode is pretty interesting. - Yeah.
- So, you know, you can't force yourself to do it for 40 or 50 minutes, can you? - Well, of course.
- Well, I think you should watch it. - I see!
- And next week, as the third episode... - Yeah.
- You still have 10 minutes left. - Hahaha!
- It's not like I'm holding back for "Senshu". - What are you talking about?
"Hontou Dai no Omotani Monmori"!
- Wow! - Wow!
- "Hontou Dai no Omotani Monmori"
- Well, since you're already here... - Yes.
- I'd like you to sit over here and have a match. - Yes.
- Okay? - Yes.
- First round, Jimmy vs. Noriasu! - Yes!
Jimmy, sit over here.
Noriasu, over here.
- What's this? - Oh, I see!
- Hahaha! - Hahaha!
- How are you going to sit?! - Huh? Well...
Like this?
- Hahaha! - Hahaha!
- Matsumoto-san, sit! - How am I supposed to sit?!
- Sit down! - Sit down!
- Hahaha!
- How can you sit like that?! - Sit down!
- Ah... - Ah...
- Okay, then Matsumoto-san, over here. - Yes.
- Uh... Yamasaki-san, over there. - Yes.
Now, open!
- Hahaha! - Hahaha!
"Hontou Dai no Omotani Monmori"!
- "Omotani Monmori"! - "Hontou Dai", do it!
If you can't do it, do it more and more!
- Yes! - Yes!
- Hey, Jimmy, do it! - Jimmy, do it!
- Hey, Jimmy, do it! - Yes!
The correct answer is...
Tokyo!
23 districts!
Yes, yes.
Now, let's go!
From Jimmy...
Shinagawa district!
Yes!
Ota district!
Memuro district!
Setagaya district!
Nakano district!
Uh... Chuo district!
Setagaya district!
You said it!
I said it!
Wait! Wait! Wait! Stop it! Stop! Stop! Stop!
What's wrong with you?
What should I have done?
I'll go first.
Downtown
Kindom 8
Gaki no Tsukai
What?
What did I do?
Answer me.
I did it in Osaka.
Down
Rock and roll
"Ni" "Ai" "Onishi"
Is it a good word or an ordinary one?
Wait a minute!
Hey! Wait a minute!
It's over.
Then, please sit down properly.
I'm Jimmy!
No, I'm glad! I absolutely don't want it!
That's right!
Yes, Mr. Carlos!
Umm... Nakasone!
Yes!
Tanaka Academy!
Yes!
Umm...
What?
All right! All right!
Wait a minute!
What?
Carlos!
Nakasone!
All right!
It's New Year's Day!
All right, let's start with Yamada-kun!
Culture Day!
Emperor's Birthday!
Yes!
Newspaper Day!
Green Day!
Yes!
Military Demonstration Day!
Culture Day! Yes!
Well, famous talents.
From us, Ireland.
Candies.
Yes.
Boys band.
Yes.
Let's go, three of them.
Yes.
Shibugaki band.
Yes.
Three of us, one hundred.
Yes.
Three of us.
Yes, Yamada-kun, Chakkiri-musume.
Yes.
Ah, ribbon!
Ribbon, yes.
Ah, ribbon!
What are you doing?
This is for...
He's laughing!
- Tendou! - Yes!
Fox bowl!
What's that!?
There is! There is! Kitsune-don!
Kitsune-don!
People of Kitsune-don!
Kitsune-don?
Yes, Kitsune-don!
Kitsune-don?
Kitsune-don!
I got it!
Gyudon!
There is no such thing as "uni-don", right?
There is!
Uni-don!
Ebi... Ebi-chiri-don!
What are you doing?
What are you doing, you guys?
What are you doing?
Let me go! Let me go!
You guys...
You'll end up like mud!
Ebi-chiri-don!
- My back hurts. - Oh, does it?
- It's really... - "Again?" I've never heard that before.
- My back hurts a little. - Oh, if you say so...
- In that case... - Yeah?
- I'll talk in the most relaxed position today. - Yeah.
- Like this? - Yeah.
- Is it okay? - Okay.
- But it's suddenly cold! It's cold!
- I can't stand it anymore!
- Can you stand up? Can you stand up?
- No, no... I don't know why my back hurts so much. - Oh, really?
- Well, speaking of which... - Yeah.
- Well, five minutes was really tough, wasn't it?
- I'm sorry, it has nothing to do with it, but...
- How about an auxiliary chair?
- Well...
- Well, I think it'd be nice if a lot of people could see it.
- Well, it's not on TV, but...
- I was sitting next to a pipe chair in a passageway!
- It reminds me of my school trip!
- The other day... - I was walking around...
- You know, you talked a lot about...
- How to get out of a garbage bag, didn't you? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- And the other day, on Fuji-TV... - Yeah.
- I met Kaga-san. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- I met Kaga-san, and...
- I went out of the dressing room and...
- I opened the door and...
- He told me a lot about the garbage bag and...
- Thank you so much!
- Oh, really?
- Of course!
- Thank you for everything!
- Well, there are a lot of problems, but you have to deal with them!
- That's what he said.
- I was the opposite. - Oh, really?
- I happened to run into Kaga-san's school.
- I was about to go to the bathroom and...
- I ran past the mirror and...
- He said, "Oh!"
- "I wanted to see you!"
- "Call me up for a show!"
- That's what he said.
- It's not like that at all!
- You know me!
- I get yelled at all the time!
- I don't know what to do!
- Good morning!
- What?!
- It's me!
It's over, isn't it?
I think I said too much, but it's been a long time since I changed into a kimono.
And then I came back to the dressing room and said, "Am I really cute?"
- And I went for a walk. - You went for a walk? - You're cute.
- I'm not cute at all. - But you're a beautiful woman, aren't you? - No.
- You haven't changed much since you were young. - No, I haven't changed much.
- Right? Like in the photos. - Right.
- You don't listen to a lot of music and CDs, do you? - I don't.
- You don't, do you? - No.
I used to listen to a lot of music a long time ago.
- And I listened to the album you released this time. - I didn't listen to it!
- Which one is it? - This one...
"Captain"...
The title of the CD is "Captain of the Ship".
- By Nagabuchi? - Yes, by Nagabuchi.
And there's a song called "Captain of the Ship" in the ninth track.
- Like the title. - Yes.
- It's 13 minutes long... - Yes, yes.
...but I'm always angry.
- What does that mean? - I'm angry.
- What does that mean? - I'm always angry.
- No, you're not angry... - That's why I haven't listened to it recently.
I used to listen to it a lot.
And I heard that you released a new album recently.
And while I was on my way to the Shinkansen...
Oh, I should tell you something.
I happened to have my own CD-walkie.
I bought it in a nearby station.
You can buy it anywhere.
And I listened to it...
And it was amazing!
You're only weird!
Weird! Weird! Weird! Weird!
You're scary!
- So you're not angry or anything like that? - I'm always angry!
- Can I say it for 13 minutes? - Yes!
"Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it!" I listened to it on the Shinkansen!
- I don't like that kind of thing. - You should listen to it!
- It's amazing! Really! - Are you going that far? - I've never listened to such a song.
I listened to it on the Shinkansen without any prior knowledge of it.
At first, after 13 minutes, for the first 5 minutes, I sang normally.
- Yes. - But somehow, I was like "Let's sing, let's sing!"
- Then, suddenly... - "Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it!"
- You should look at the lyrics, right? - Yes.
Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it!
If you go, you'll become a stranger!
Unico-chan!
What's 'Unico-chan'?
If you go, you'll become a stranger!
With that kind of feeling, I was quite shocked.
What do you mean by "shocked"?
With such a high tension, in a recording studio,
in the middle of it, with the glass on this side,
you're singing, right?
What's wrong with that mood?
You shouldn't laugh.
You absolutely shouldn't laugh!
You're probably listening like this, but here...
If you do that, you'll be kicked out for a long time!
You'll come out and be kicked out!
You'll be kicked out for a long time!
It's fine to win, isn't it?
But, you know, those people are limited.
The bad guys are getting more and more.
Right?
But, you know, it's a kind of mix of live performances.
Yes.
So, it's beneficial, isn't it?
Yes.
Well, I'm singing wrong, but everyone is paying attention.
Well, that's a different angle.
I should say I'm singing wrong, but everyone is paying attention!
Even in love!
Even in Tokyo Dome!
Even in France!
What are you talking about?
Even in bed!
There's no one asking their friends!
Don't say stupid things!
There's no one asking.
There's a video called "fucked up".
He said something amazing about it.
Oh, really?
He said "siri mezzrezzia".
"fucked up" has a painful part, you know?
I know it now!
I finally know it now!
There's a way in, and there's a way out.
In the past, you could go forward because you didn't care about anything.
But it's different now!
There's a way in, and there's a way out.
So, what I want to say is...
Everyone has to be happy!
Be happy!
But it's okay!
But it's okay for that person!
But it's okay.
It's okay for that person.
It's okay.
And you can say whatever you want without shouting it out loud.
Well, well, well...
That's the good thing about being a singer.
You don't have to think about ad-libbing or anything like that.
You don't have to lie about anything.
But being a singer is almost always a lie.
You're saying something special about being a singer today!
That's what being a singer can do for you.
Being a singer is especially strong.
If you sell one song, you'll never be able to eat again.
Being a singer is especially strong.
What? You can't eat one song and you sell one song?
Why do you have a hot spring at home?
Sorry, I'm not good at this either.
By the way, I remembered!
The other day...
You said you were a singer, didn't you?
Turn it off!
Hey, hey, look at me!
You...
You said you were a singer, didn't you?
Of course!
I thought you were a singer, didn't you?
You don't have to be so scared of me.
Just listen to me!
The one standing in front of you is Nagase something or other.
He's scary.
He's not cool.
I heard you're talking about me.
I'm counting on you.
I'm sorry.
I don't like it.
It's hot.
Why do we smell when we grow up?
Children don't smell much.
But we start to smell when we grow up.
We don't have armpits when we were little.
We start to smell when we grow up.
There are old men who smell bad breath.
There really are.
It smells really bad.
I won't say who it is.
It's not here.
Please give me a microphone.
I wonder why.
More and more like this...
That's because when you're old, you all smell like old men.
I see.
I don't want to use this much against old men.
Old men's breath stinks, you know?
I don't know about old men's breath.
Old men's breath stinks, but my breath stinks.
I don't know!
There are certain laws and certain principles.
Which of the two is different between the law and the principle?
Law and principle...
I don't know about this.
This is difficult.
It's the latter.
It's the principle of principle.
I see.
You're making me laugh.
You know what's popular in America right now?
Do you know Murphy's law?
What is it?
You know...
There are many Murphy's laws in the world.
Murphy's! Murphy's! Which one?
Murphy's laws...
What are you talking about?
What are you mumbling about?
That is...
In everyday life...
For example...
If you always had an umbrella in your bag...
But you don't need it anymore...
You think like that...
And you leave it at home...
It will rain only on that day.
That is Murphy's law of love.
Oh, is that so?
You're talking while you're talking.
It's unpleasant.
Oh, so that's Murphy's law of love.
For example...
Let's say you had...
Four coins...
One 100 yen coin...
And five 10 yen coins...
In your pocket, right?
That's Murphy's law of love, in my opinion.
Oh, I see.
Then I'll just listen to you.
You hear a "chirring" sound, right?
If you look at it from a probability perspective...
It should be 10 yen, but it's 100 yen, right?
Uh-huh.
What are you talking about?!
You said the law properly!
- In the dark... - Which one? The one on the book?
- No, no, mine, mine. - Ah, I see.
In the dark, I put on my pajamas.
At that moment, I thought, "Am I going to look back?"
If I stay like this, I'll probably look back.
So I turned around and turned on the light.
And of course, I looked back!
You know what I mean, right?
You don't... you don't have to react like that!
In the world, there are a lot of Marvin's Laws lying around.
- They're funny. - They're funny.
So I'm going to tell you eight Marvin's Laws you came up with.
Um... I heard rumors that Matsumoto-san is joining the Reserve Friends Association.
Is that so?
Where can I join?
Go to a bar!
It's a long way from here!
What do you remember from your earliest childhood?
I don't remember.
So...
What do you remember from your earliest childhood?
I don't remember that.
When I was little, I remember it very clearly.
Before that, I don't know what it was.
What is it?
Are you stupid?!
No, I'm serious.
I remember a lot of it.
When I was in kindergarten, we'd go to the back of the bathroom...
...and we'd eat ramen and drink beer and stuff like that.
Of course we all remember that.
And then, you know... we'd heat up the room and...