AISubs v3.5
Araende, nice to meet you!
Nice to meet you, too!
Next time it's Araende, next time it's a penalty game showdown!
Kouhaku, which one of you is Katsunyanen?
Hey, isn't this weird?
Hey, hey, hey, Osaka people, I'm getting angry!
There's no such word!
Katsunyanen, you!
Who wrote this?
I don't know.
Raise your hand.
Otobuki-san.
What?
Idiot.
[a song in the 42nd NHK Song Contest]
This time, there are two singers from the 42nd NHK Song Contest.
There are quite a few first-timers, as well.
Who is this?
I just heard about it earlier.
A long time ago, Haisao Uji-san...
"Haisao Uji-san"?
He sang an Okinawan song.
Who is Smokey Mountain?
I don't know at all.
There is a strange one in red.
Who is it?
Who is Sarah Brightman?
Who knows Sarah Brightman?
I don't know.
Walking down the street and seeing Sarah Brightman.
Who is it?
I won't show you my face.
Oyan Huihui...
It's not Huihui. It's Oyan Huihui.
Oyan Huihui's song is "Love is Over".
Why "Love is Over" again?
This song is a hot topic in Minami-san.
What song is it? Even a 17-year-old can sing it.
What song is it?
"Colored Corners of Town".
"Colored Corners of Town"...
Who is Sawada Chikako?
"Going to the sea this year"...
This guy won't wake up, will he?
His neck will bend that day.
You idiot!
If you're this old and you think you can sing "Going to the sea this year", you should ride in front of me.
You should ride in front of me.
Is that so?
Of course!
Well, looking at this...
There is no basis for this.
There is no basis for this, but...
As a viewer...
I think white is more popular.
The order of singing is not decided yet.
That's true.
But it's very difficult to predict.
It's arranged in order of love and hate.
So it's not a big deal who sings first.
Oh, I see.
If it's possible, I'd like you to make me sing first.
The order of singing?
Yes, the order of singing.
If I sing first, you have to make me sing first.
You have to make me sing first.
That's right.
You have to make me sing first.
What?
Nobody knows!
Even if you make me sing first, it's still a big deal.
I don't know why, but it's hard.
No, I think it's red.
This time.
I think the sound is the problem.
The red band.
You know, Akko-san, you had a skull, right?
I didn't know if it would come out or not.
Maybe, no, maybe Akko-san will cry after burning up.
Because you sang.
You've done so much, it hurts a little, but you sang.
It will come out, right?
I don't know about that.
No, it will come out.
There is also Ayo.
There is also Jinjinjin.
There is also Mike.
I see! When I was pressed by Abaraka, it came out and I said Jinjinjin, it was quite moving for everyone, right?
No, it's not like that.
I've seen it many times.
It's still red.
Red!
It was separated cleanly.
It was separated, right?
There was no problem at all.
Yes, yes.
If we lose like this, what should we do?
It's a punishment game, right?
It's been a while since we decided on a punishment game.
We thought about it a lot, but we decided on it.
We decided, right?
We decided to jack other programs.
That's how it started.
Right, right, right.
But there is one more thing.
The reaction is bad!
So we thought about it a lot, but...
Color Bar!
Challenge Color Bar!
That's right.
What time does the show end on Sundays?
It ends at two and a half.
And the next show is probably at five and a half.
About five.
There is about two and a half hours in between.
Yes, that's right.
Some of the time, about five minutes,
Either way, the one who loses becomes Color Bar and...
We haven't gotten permission for it yet.
We don't know yet.
If it doesn't work,
If it doesn't work and the show ends on Sundays,
Then a picture of a pigeon comes up.
A pigeon comes up.
Two days later.
Either of us will do the pigeon.
It's early in the morning, but...
What time is it?
About four o'clock.
About four o'clock or three o'clock or four o'clock in the world.
If I lose, what will you do?
I'm fine.
Don't touch me.
What are you saying?
Of course not.
No, it's not like that.
Even if you lose, I'll go.
Absolutely not.
There's no way.
I think that's what a show is like.
No, I don't want to be a punishment.
Don't look at me like that.
[laughter]
Ladies and gentlemen...
It's the first time we're doing this in a proper studio like this.
It's the first time.
It's unpleasant.
It's unpleasant, isn't it?
Then let's go home early.
Let's go home.
Let's go far away.
The other day...
Yeah?
The other day...
You don't seem like you're being looked down upon.
[laughter]
I'm being looked down upon a little.
You know, you seem like you're on fire.
What do you mean I'm on fire?
You know, you seem like you're on fire.
You idiot!
Isn't that what you think?
You look like you're about to kill someone.
What are you talking about?
You look like you're about to kill someone!
You know...
I went into a convenience store.
You know, I was in middle school.
They were like, "Hey, Machan. Machan."
I was wearing a hat.
But I didn't know much about it.
In 11th or 12th grade, a woman came up to me and said...
Hey, Machan. Machan.
And I was like...
Are you being looked down upon?
[laughter]
What do you mean I'm being looked down upon?
I'm wearing a hat and I'm like...
You know, I touched her skin and I got away from her.
Are you kidding me?
I was wearing a hat and I was like...
She's looking down on me. She's looking down on me.
I was thinking about what would happen next.
She took my hat and she said...
Hey, Machan. Machan.
Hey, Machan.
And I was like...
[laughter]
Hey, Machan.
[laughter]
I couldn't stand it anymore.
You couldn't stand it anymore.
I mean, girls usually don't get mad.
I was wearing a hat and I got away from her...
And I got in a taxi and I was like...
I can't get mad at her in this situation.
I know, right?
I was thinking about it and I was like...
It's amazing.
Why is that?
You're not supposed to be driving like this, are you?
Hahaha! What is this?
[laughter]
Wait! Wait a minute!
[laughter]
Normally, when people suddenly come to you, you don't get angry right away.
If you don't get angry, you go home and calm down and think about it and get angry.
Well, that's bad, too.
You're a little different.
No, I'm not.
You're just a foreigner.
Why is that?
I don't hate you, but I absolutely hate you!
Ugh, I said too much.
I'm sorry, but you're a foreigner in that sense, right?
Absolutely, absolutely not!
There was a long time ago in Osaka when you got in a taxi with an old man.
I stopped you at first, right?
Ah, yes, yes, yes, yes!
I was definitely angry about that!
Huh?
Even thinking about it makes me angry!
I know, right?
Nine years ago...
Huh?
When you were still working, I treated you like a chemotherapist, right?
Yes, yes, yes!
That's right! I told you to get in the taxi!
Yes, yes, yes!
I went all the way to the station!
Yes, yes, yes!
I felt sorry for you, but...
Yes, yes, yes!
I said I'd like you to do me a favor...
Huh?
I didn't want you to get on the bus from there!
Yes, yes, yes!
It came like this!
And now...
After the audience left, the audience came out!
I can't get on the bus with you!
Huh?
You're not cool!
And now... I'm sorry...
Get in!
Are you mad?
Why are you mad?
You're the one who's mad!
Get in!
And now...
Now that you've gotten in...
You came to stop me, didn't you?
Yes, yes, yes!
And you came to stop me!
Stop it! Stop it!
No!
Get in! What's wrong with you?!
You heard me say that, and you...
Stop it!
You two said "Wow!"
Yes, yes, yes!
But you know...
Sometimes you get mad, but...
There's a fear somewhere, isn't there?
What?
You look like you're depressed, but you're actually strong, aren't you?
You don't think like that, do you?
Ah, you're right!
You don't think like that, do you?
No...
That doesn't matter, does it?
You're not scared of anything...
That's not...
You're still...
Then, brother, let me say it.
I know, I know.
What?
I know, I know.
What are you saying?
I'm not scared of anything...
Give me, give me, you bastard!
The two of them are in the middle of the road...
Get off at the next station, you bastard!
No, no, that's enough.
No, no, get off!
He said and ran away at the next station.
No, you get off first.
Don't say that!
You ran away, Matchan!
You're misunderstanding! You ran away!
I ran away!
You ran away! You ran away!
Did you run away?
No, I went down and hit you right here!
Don't say anything!
No, really, Hamada-kun, who doesn't know anything about life...
What are you saying?
You're going to get killed.
You guys?
You're going to get killed, really and seriously.
Do you know about this guy?
That reporter...
Somehow...
His wife...
Ask her when she first hurt him!
You're going to get killed.
You're going to get killed, too.
What did you do?
I said something about Iranians.
What did you say?
Those guys...
What about those guys?
Where did you get those guys from?
I kept hearing them.
Those Iranians?
Iranians?
Those guys you see on TV.
I wonder why.
If I show my dick here...
They'll probably call me anyway.
Well, before that...
Shouldn't you cut it off?
Hmm...
Is my dick so big you can cut it off?
There's no way a mosaic can only come out like this!
So my dick grew out...
And spread out!
Stop it!
Setagaya-kun, Nagayama-kun.
Good evening, Ran-chan and Utaro-san.
Today we have a question for you two.
Bon-yo-yo-yo-yon
Bin-yo-yo-yo-yon
Bun-yo-yo-yo-yon
Which one of these looks like it'll make you feel good?
Bin-yo-yo-yo-yon
It doesn't look like it'll be funny at all!
You're still not good enough.
"Bin-yo-yo-yo-yon" is the funniest of the three.
Which one is funny?
Bun-yo-yo-yo-yon
You're still not good enough!
Bun-yo-yo-yo-yon
It's not funny at all!
Bin-yo-yo-yo-yon
Shall we try it?
Bin-yo-yo-yo-yon
It's not funny at all!
Bun-yo-yo-yo-yon
You two!
You two in front of me aren't funny at all!
How many of you are like this?!
That's right!
What?
That's right!
It's ridiculous!
It's a matter of how you do it!
It's ridiculous!
Why do you say such dirty things?!
Right now, I have a man who is being forced to do something.
I hope that man will be able to say something.
I wonder what he will say.
That's what I'm asking you about.
But instead of that, you're telling your friend's boyfriend what to do.
That's classic gay style!
What is your boyfriend like?
A little...
A little scary?
He's a little crazy.
Crazy?
I don't know why, but I don't know if the man you're talking about is crazy or not.
I took him crazy, but...
If he's crazy, you don't know?
If he's crazy, I don't know.
I don't know about that.
I don't know about that at all.
I don't know about that.
I don't know about that at all.
Shake it!
There!
What's that?
Mr. Kona told me about it.
I see, I see.
What do you call it when your girlfriend is hated? Like she becomes a pig or something like that.
If you do that, everyone will hate you.
You can't live only with this man.
Even your parents will hate you. Everything will end.
It's painful.
First of all, it's best to make her look like a pig.
Right?
It's not good for the stage.
It's too much for the stage.
I think it's best to make her look like she's changed a little.
I see.
Like changing her hobby of clothing.
It's not cool anymore.
Let's go.
Let's decide on a date time and place.
It can be in Shibuya or somewhere like Hachikōmai.
Let's go somewhere like that.
Before everyone is watching...
Let's go in a way that won't happen again.
Let's say we're together and it's embarrassing.
I see.
What do you think we should do?
First of all...
This place is like armor.
It's far beyond that.
What do you mean?
It's strange.
There is a big one like this, with a sword like this.
With a shield like this.
Only the top of it is like this.
It's like it's raised like this.
First, like this.
And like this, like a high heel.
Like a woman.
Like a womanly side.
If you show up like this, the other party probably won't meet you anymore.
It's like that.
You should say it like that.
Well, it might be ugly.
Right?
Yes.
Anyway, cut.
Otsumotenten!
Now, when and how is this done?
Isn't it said when you do something bad?
When you're young.
Huh?
Isn't it?
Is it said when a child does something bad?
Didn't you use it at that time?
No, no, don't ask me!
No, you're asking me!
You know it!
I know it!
No, how do you usually use it?
I don't usually use it like this.
At the end of the year.
At the end of the year, why do you use otsumotenten?
When everyone was so excited...
Well, it's about time I use otsumotenten.
Otsumotenten of the Takeda army.
Look, it's autumn this year.
Takezakumo is calling you!
But go ahead. I don't want to see it. I don't want to see it.
You want me to be stupid again, don't you?
No, no, no. I don't know. Everyone doesn't know.
What?
It's autumn this year and it's autumn this year.
You've seen it, haven't you?
No, that's why I'm asking you.
Just do it for once. Autumn this year.
Autumn this year?
It's not funny at all.
What do you want me to do? I don't know.
What do you want me to do?
When you said you'd make it autumn this year, I couldn't see your joke.
You couldn't see it?
No.
Even after ten years, you still couldn't see my joke?
That's why you should do it!
What do you want me to do? Autumn this year?
You can't make a joke you can't see!
This tooth is shining.
See, you can talk for a long time.
Oh!
My head!
This is it!
This will spread!
When I was in kindergarten, I was playing in the parking lot and I got on the hood of the car and slipped and fell from my head.
Yes.
At that time, I happened to have dog poop and it became a cushion and I was saved.
Seeing me with dog poop on my head, my friend ran away.
On my way home crying, my grandmother put water on my armpit and wiped it for me.
Before I go to school this autumn, I want to say something.
Yesterday, I stepped on a dog's poop and it became a cushion.
I stepped on a dog's poop and it became a cushion.
Who decided it was a dog?
Of course, it's only a dog or a cat in that circle.
Is that so?
What's there?
Who's doing it? On the road.
There are also insects and such.
No, no, you know what a dog or a cat is, don't you?
If you look at a dog or a cat, it's boring.
If you look at a dog or a cat, they're all mine.
But you...
Insects don't make such a big poop.
Don't you know?
Insects? What kind of insects?
Insects like this make bigger poops than our bodies.
I don't know! Where are these insects hidden?
There are a lot of insects! They gather and pile up and I don't know if they are small or big.
You! I don't know if they are small or big!
What?
I don't know if they are big or small!
What do you mean "big"? Are you human?
What?
Do you poop with your wet clothes?
I don't know if there are such insects. Don't decide with a dog!
I didn't put a tissue.
You! You pooped on the side of a car.
An old man who doesn't have common sense doesn't poop in such a place.
Is it possible?
Does common sense have nothing to do with you?
Even if you are born and raised, you don't poop, do you?
Even if you are not an old man, you say you don't know if you are a dog.
So you may be an old man. That's why I say so.
There are many insects that poop. Tiger, leopard, rhino, elephant, giraffe.
But it's a lie! There is no such thing!
Why?
Why? They don't come there.
You don't know?
I don't know. They never come there.
They do.
No, they don't!
They do!
No, they don't!
I've seen it.
What's wrong with me?
You started it again.
So don't judge me by my dog's poop.
First of all, I'd like to tell you about it.
Well, it may be dog's poop, but is that what you think of?
You know, there was a bucket of water in the bench.
I went there.
It's cold!
It's cold! So I went there and went into the bucket.
It's like I'm alive.
But it was too far to go up.