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The first episode of "Gaki no Tsukai Arahende", monthly "Body Weakness"!
Good morning!
Hey, where's your usual dandy, Masumoto-kun?
What do you mean?
Your head looks like this.
No, it doesn't. I can't fix it.
Here, here.
I'll fix it.
I can't see what you were trying to do, but it looks like you couldn't do it anymore.
I can't do it anymore. My body is exhausted.
You have a companion.
I can't do it anymore. Really.
Today is the opening. "Body Weakness".
It's like a nervous breakdown.
When we're together, we have to do something.
Our bodies...
When we're together, we can't do it!
No, you can't do it! When you're together, I can't do it!
Ah, I see, I see.
Too bad.
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I think I know most of it.
One raw egg.
I have a lot like this lying around.
Here's a face washing pair of scissors.
Ah!
I'm really, really ugly, aren't I?
Wearing a bald head...
Ah, that's not it!
Was it like this? Swallowing a sweet ball?
That's right.
It's like this, isn't it?
No, no, it's like this.
It's like this, isn't it?
Ah!
It's like this!
I don't get it at all!
Can you take it off for me?
No, no, no!
What's in here?
You!
What's in here?
Eh?!
No, no!
I thought you were supposed to touch this.
It's like this.
It's like this!
Look!
Come here!
What?!
God Hingami!
It's like this, isn't it?
Look, it's like this!
Eh?!
It's like this!
It's not like that!
Don't say things like that!
It's like this!
It's not like that!
Don't say things like that!
I'm really ugly, aren't I?
It's like this, isn't it?
With a light touch...
Look!
And...
No! It's this!
Garaskinti!
So...
The god of the galaxy is...
...Galaskinti.
And the song of the mountains is...
...Kabuki.
And...
...Nut.
Here you are.
You look like a windmill.
I'm hungry.
Here you are.
Oh, it's disgusting!
It's blue!
Next!
This one!
This is a raw egg.
Are you promoting it?
What is it?
Is it a question?
It's either soy sauce or something else.
I don't put it like that.
Rocky doesn't put it like that.
Excuse me for a moment.
I felt like something was coming.
What is it?
What do you do with it?
You put it in your mouth and bite it.
It bites you, doesn't it?
And you do it like this.
You do it like this.
Open your mouth and bite it.
It doesn't have to be in the galaxy!
The galaxy has more power!
What is it?
Next is...
...Galaskinti.
What is it?
Are you an animal or what?
I don't like you at all.
This guy, I don't like you at all.
This is a cross sectional line.
It's not like that. It's not like that. I'm a human.
You're not.
Isn't it rotten? It doesn't really matter.
What's wrong with it being rotten?
What do you mean it's not? I'm a human.
Hey, you!
What are you doing?
Wow!
That's enough.
It's not that bad here.
Here.
It's not that bad here.
It's definitely not that bad here.
What's with this hand?
Ouch, ouch, ouch!
It hurts like hell!
It doesn't hurt like that.
It hurts like hell!
That's enough, you two.
That's enough!
Ouch, ouch, ouch!
Next...
Is that all of it?
No, there's more.
Is that all of it?
Don't be so naive.
Look at the earlobe. It's all jagged.
There's no need for that.
Here you go.
Is that all of it?
Why are you mixing it up?
Just mix it up already.
If you mix it up, you won't be able to drink it.
Drink it up.
Is that all of it?
That's all of it, right?
You two...
There you go!
Oh, gross!
I can't put it into words.
And with that, that's all for today.
Wait, you're going to eat 20 times as much as me?
No, seriously, even if you make me eat this much, I won't get too excited.
You know, I'm fine with spicy food.
Well, well, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine.
It's good.
What are you talking about? Are you an animal or something?
It's fine, but...
It's spicy!
It's fine, it's spicy, but it's fine...
Are you crazy?!
No, it's fine.
It's spicy!
No, it's spicy, but it's still good.
If it's spicy, you say "argh!" or "argh!"
Ugh!
No, it's not like that!
What are you going to do if you're happy?
Huh?
With your face up at the end, you say "argh, it's spicy, I can't stand it!"
Hey, you!
You eat 20 times as much as me.
It's spicy, so don't get too excited!
It's spicy, I can't stand it!
Why do you say it like that?!
It's spicy, I can't stand it!
Good morning!
No, really...
Where is the center here?
I don't know where the center is.
Where is the center?
Let's talk!
What should we talk about?
Hey, I think I need to give you a lesson today.
What is it?
You really cheat a lot at work, don't you?
This is sad!
I'm not cheating at all.
Actually, it's my fault.
I'm doing a different job, and it's my fault.
My schedule was...
"Don't mess with me, you idiot!" It was like that for two weeks.
Oh, I see. So you were saying bad things about Masakado Tamura.
No, I wasn't.
"Bad things"?
No, no, I wasn't.
But I wanted to tell the company about it.
Oh, you have a lot of things you want to say to the company.
I wanted to tell them that it was terrible.
And on Thursday, when I was finally done,
I suddenly realized that Ryoma had...
Don't worry about it!
Ryoma was in Osaka.
Oh, I see.
I'm really sorry about that.
Well, there are a lot of bad things you can say about the company.
Well, yeah.
Because on Fridays, I'm the last one to come here.
On Thursdays and Fridays, I have work in Osaka, and I'm the last one to come here.
Then I, as a manager, only have Nitta with me.
Nitta still has her neck out for me.
No, no.
Nitta still has her neck out for me.
No!
I'm not supposed to follow you around.
What do you mean, "neck out for you"?
No, no, no.
It sounds like you're writing it down.
I'm writing it down.
Anyway, Nitta is still a human being.
She still has a lot of things she wants me to do.
What are you talking about?!
Anyway, Nitta is assigned by the company and told to work for two people.
But Nitta still wants me to hug her.
I'm not writing it down.
No, no.
The atmosphere is that Nitta still wants me to hug her.
What kind of atmosphere is that?!
No, no.
This job...
I knew it!
I knew you wouldn't let me do it!
The company told me not to do it and told me to hug a guy I didn't like.
So you're not going to hug him or anything like that?
No, no.
I'm talking about management.
If you compare management between a man and a woman,
the truth is that the company likes Hamada emotionally.
Oh, really?
If you do something about Hamada, you can say anything about him.
If you say it like that, I'll get mad.
So what?
Come on! It's Friday!
I feel sorry for you.
You're going home alone for the first time in three hours.
No, no!
Don't go back to Osaka!
It's fine if you go home alone.
It's not Osaka!
You have to come here from Osaka!
Oh, you have to come, but...
In that three-hour train...
I feel sorry for you.
It's not like that!
Why don't you do it on your own way back home?
That's fine. I'll arrive in Tokyo.
But when I arrive, it's raining like crazy.
When I see the taxi drivers, they're all lined up.
I can't line up like that!
Why?
You're saying weird things.
No, you!
Why?
There are taxi drivers in line, right?
Yeah.
Because you want to get in?
Yeah.
Line up! If you want to get in, too.
No, no, no...
There are so many in line!
Yeah, I know!
But you can't get in line, can you?
Line up!
My body is weakening.
I want to go home quickly!
You want to go home, and you're saying weird things.
Yeah, I want to go home.
You want to go home, and you're saying weird things.
I can't get in!
Why not?
Line up!
How do you want to go home?
You want to go home, and you're saying weird things.
Yeah.
You can't do that!
What?
You can't do that!
If you were a normal office worker, you'd get in a car and come pick you up at the station.
You'd say, "Hello, hello," and get in the car and go home.
"Wow, it's raining," you'd say.
Why are you speaking standard Japanese?
No, no, no...
"It's raining," you'd say!
It's raining, and you're in the rain...
There are taxi drivers in line...
If you're in the other direction, there are sometimes taxi drivers who stop.
If you cross...
But there's no umbrella...
But you can't help it, because everyone's in line...
If you say it, it'll rain like crazy...
Even if you raise your hand like this...
The car won't stop...
It's soaking wet!
It's all muddy!
Why is it muddy?
No, no, no...
It's running around...
Oh, I see...
It's like, "Bah!"
You're lying!
Why is this happening?
And then, from behind...
Bah!
Bah, bah, bah!
Pishya! Pishya!
You're soaked in water...
Bah!
It's amazing!
It's like a stain!
And you're back in the car...
If you'd stopped in front of me, I'd be happy...
But you're in my way!
And you're in my way again...
And it takes about an hour...
And you finally get in the taxi...
And you go home...
And you get in the taxi...
And you give me the receipt...
But you don't give it to me...
I don't give it to you...
What's this?
Yeah, yeah...
It's not even 5,000 yen...
If it's more than 5,000 yen...
There must be a reason for it...
I got in the taxi!
That's what you say!
And you, Nozawa...
Even though you take a break...
You get paid...
You take a break for two years...
And you get paid the same amount every month...
Is there such a stupid story?
That's ridiculous!
So, as a company...
You treat Nozawa...
As if he was a serial killer for two years?
Yeah, yeah...
Why does Nozawa have such good memories?
Well, to put it simply...
Um...
To... Yoshimoto Industries...
It's because he's a Tokyo Section talent.
Yes, yes.
Nozawa is.
We Yoshimoto Industries are Osaka's main company.
There's a difference in that.
Usually, the main company's people have better memories.
It's not like that for us!
The Tokyo... Tokyo Section has a higher salary.
You know what I mean.
That's where the difference is.
But even now, Yoshimoto...
If you don't let Dunton do his job, he'll suffer afterwards!
I don't know if he's angry with me or not!
That's...
That's not good at all!
No, I mean...
It's up to the company's negotiations.
If I say it, they'll probably say, "It's a shame, isn't it?"
They'll say that, right?
They'll sit down and say, "It's a shame, isn't it?"
And then they'll say, "Bash it!"
You have to say, "Bash it!" this year.
What do you mean by "you"?
You're the one who's going to negotiate!
No...
You said you'd go with me this year, didn't you?
Well, I'll go, but I'll at least support you.
You!
You! You!
Then you'll say, "Bash it!"
What's that?!
I thought you'd say that, too!
"You! You!" What's that?!
So...
Okay, I'll say, "Bash it!"
I'll say, "Bash it!"
If you say, "What?!"
I'll say, "No, bash it!"
You stupid human being!
You're really annoying, aren't you?!
I really don't have any money.
Do your best, will you?
Of course you don't.
I don't!
How much money do you have?!
There should be plenty of money, shouldn't there?!
There's nothing left.
What good is it for you?!
Even if it's Koumei, it's a big shock for me!
You're really strange!
How many meals do you eat? How much do you eat?
I eat a lot!
How much do you eat when you go to a barbecue restaurant?
That's amazing!
The cows say "give me a break"!
What is it?
The cows you are eating say "give me a break"?
Or the cows you are waiting for say "enough"?
When the little cows come and say "enough",
I say "how many meals do you eat?
And I'm like "enough, enough"!
So I need money right now!
You're so persuasive!
So I'm really looking forward to the prize from "Quiz Show".
And you know that special edition of "Shoubai Shoubai"?
I got it for 1.3 million yen.
1.3 million yen worth of gold, right?
Gold!
Look, I won!
On this show!
On this fucking local in Tokyo!
On other shows all over the country!
This guy...
- It was amazing. - What is it?
- I can't live in the entertainment world anymore.
- At that time... - What is it?
- They were cutting pumpkins and what they were making.
- They were cutting pumpkins and putting them in buckets.
- At that time, everyone was pushing them out.
- "Hey, what are you doing?" they said.
- "Get out of here!" they said.
- Then, everyone came here. Who was there at that time?
- Well... - You know the Tsumori team, right?
- Segiguchi-san and... - Segiguchi-san.
- A girl named Takagi-something. - Yes, yes.
- Then, Yamashiro-san came here. - Yamashiro-san came here.
- She said, "I'm a jelly-jam now!"
- "I'll push you out, but you won't push me out at all!"
- "Segiguchi-san is faster than me!"
- "What do you think you're doing?"
- "I'll get on top of this table and go "Whoa!""
- "I'll grab Segiguchi-san's chest and push him out!"
I mean...
How can I say it?
The audience and the staff were all excited!
They were surprised!
This time it's you!
In the end, Segiguchi-san's answer was different.
I don't know anymore! Let me do it!
He told everyone, "Performer!"
And then, Hamada did it again and Yamashiro-san was like "Bang!"
Yamashiro, come here!
And when Yamashiro-san answered, it was different again.
Finally, Hamada and Segiguchi-san got along again.
Segiguchi-san said "Jam!" first.
And then, Hamada said, "Oh, no! I was answered!"
And then, he did "Boo!"
You're crazy! Don't get so excited just by answering!
Make some noise!
What?!
I didn't say anything!
Ever since you came out, you've been screaming!
You scared me! I didn't say anything!
Hello!
Um...
The monkey who was in front of you came out.
He kept asking you to come out.
Again?!
That's amazing! Let me relax for a bit!
That's amazing!
Name, Lioness Asuka.
This Lioness has a beak! Lioness!
Stop it!
With her beak!
She's a 3AA world champion!
She's kind of excited!
She doesn't say anything!
She's been racing lately.
Yes, she's in a racing suit today.
I'm in the middle of it.
I can't get in because of my normal size.
Why did you decide to race again?
I want to do something other than pro-wrestling.
I like dangerous things.
I see.
After pro-wrestling, you want to leave yourself in a dangerous position.
Yes.
You're the same age!
38 years old?
Yes!
Aren't you "tame" age?
"Tame" again?
You're "usagi" age, aren't you?
I'm "usagi" age.
Oh, I see.
So what were you looking at last night?
That's right.
Also, I was asked to do something with you last time.
I gave you a toy.
Oh, really?
Thank you.
I'm sorry I didn't tell you.
Is it a toy?
It looks like one.
No, it's fine.
It looks like one.
No, it's fine.
It's just a toy.
Are you crazy?
Oh, this is like a doll.
Thank you.
What are you going to do in bed?
Thank you very much for coming all the way here.
Thank you very much.
Thank you for coming.
This is how entertainers like you want to come.
That's right.
It's hot.
Cut it out!
Hello.
Hello, hello.
When we had a special edition before, we had many guests wear it.
When Kazuhiko Hibino wore it, we had him design it for us.
That T-shirt is now complete.
Yes.
That's "the" "oon" "town".
This is "down" and "town".
And that is...
Let me see...
This is "down" and "town".
There are three pieces now.
Yes.
That's it.
Do you have any presents for us?
I don't have any.
This is good.
The sleeves are short, right?
Yes, yes.
This is good.
Even the elbow is...
It's not cool to come all the way here.
It's good, isn't it?
Thank you very much.
Viewers can decide if you want it or not.
And...
"Let's Surprise Ichan and Nanchan".
It will be decided tonight.
"Prank Surprise".
"Brand Champion".
It will be broadcast from April 8th, Monday night at 7pm for two hours.
And...
We are looking for assistants and fans.
We are looking for you.
Please support us more and more.
So...
See you.
Where will you go?
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