AISubs v3.5
I don't want to be alone! I hate downtown! Chiki- chiki-staff Measurement Box!
What do you mean?
Well, since it's a measurement box, you can say whatever you want to us.
I see. This program has been running for one and a half or two years.
You must have something in mind.
I can't say it now.
I see. You are so kind.
I can't say it now. I won't write my name and say anything.
I don't know who wrote what.
To be honest, we are the kind of people who accept things directly.
Yes, yes.
We are the kind of people who admit mistakes.
I see.
But we think it's okay to say it as it is.
Oh, do you?
Well, we think it's okay to say it as it is.
Yes, yes.
This is a measurement box.
In order...
Why is it so messy?
What is it?
It's useful, isn't it?
Yes, it is.
I see.
Well, I don't know what will come out of it.
Let's have a look.
Yes, let's do it.
Let's do it.
It's the second one.
No, it's the first one.
Who could it be?
Hamada, you're not funny at all.
Five years later, Team Zero Yamazaki...
Yamazaki!
Say something!
I'm sorry.
Do you know what you're doing in your room?
How dare you!
Do you really think so?
I'm just being honest.
"Five years later" is serious.
Five years later is fine.
I see.
But it's not good for young people to think like that.
I used to think so, too.
He's not funny at all. I'm funny.
I used to think so, too, when I was young.
But I had a talent.
Five years later
This is for Matsumoto.
Don't call me Nakasone.
Remember my name.
That's all.
Now, who am I?
You're that stylist's daughter.
She's over there.
Go ahead.
What's your real name?
I'm Uesugi.
I can't remember your name!
What do you mean?
"Uesugi" is strange.
I always remember your name.
Don't call me Matsumoto.
What do you mean?
No, well, Noriyasu-kun...
Gave it to me?
Yes.
But I'm a father! A father like me can't have a father like you!
But I'm a father!
Now, shall we go back?
What's this?
In Okinawa, in Roppongi, you always bring me delicious women.
Even if you give me one of them, you won't get a punishment.
When I gave it to you, I wrote my name on the edge of it.
Even though you don't know what it says.
I thought you wouldn't know.
That's right.
I thought I'd put it here and cut it.
Now, Otomo.
Otomo!
Now, Otomo.
What's this about?
Sometimes...
What?
Sometimes I...
What?
I like girls.
You like girls?
Yes.
Do you like girls?
Yes, I do.
You don't say it often?
No, I don't.
Do you think I like girls too much?
Well...
I don't know...
But I don't care!
To Chief Saito.
I've been dating for ten years and I've never seen Saito's girlfriend for a second.
If she's not here, I don't think she's here.
This is funny.
Wait, wait, where is it?
Where, where, where?
I think...
Next week's opening show or something...
I don't know if they're doing it or not.
I don't think they're doing it.
Saito!
You bastard!
Did you hear the assistant's phone number?
Don't you know about this kind of team director?
You bastard!
Did you see that face?
I did!
You didn't see my face, did you?
I was making such a disgusting face!
Saito!
What were you doing?
What did you ask me?
You asked me a lot of questions!
Look at me!
It's funny that you're sitting next to me when we're having a meeting!
You're the one who's talking!
I thought I had to say something.
This is what a director is like!
Oh, I see.
Are you OK wearing such a skirt?
I can't turn!
You can turn after you've done it.
Well, it was a little late to start today, wasn't it?
Yes.
This is my fault, and I'm sorry about it.
Shut up and talk!
What did you do before it started?
What?
What did you do before it started?
I, well, I've been called "nice guy", "nice guy", but...
I've been...
I've been pooping.
Even if you say you're "nice guy", you still poop, don't you?
At first glance, you don't look like you're going to poop, do you?
Idiot!
But you do look like you're going to poop, don't you?
You look like you're going to die.
How many times did you do it?
What?
How many times did you do it?
As I always say, I do it about once a week.
I do it about five times a week, and once a week I eat about two hamsters.
Two hamsters? That's not much.
By the way, a few hours ago, the second-hand guy started to act like a second-hand guy.
What? Like he hasn't pooped it all out yet?
He started to act like he didn't mean to.
That happens.
Doesn't it?
Once... Well, it happens. Once you poop, it's over.
When you put on your underwear, you say you'll let it go.
That's weird.
What? There's more?
That's what happened earlier.
That's right.
Did you wipe it properly?
What?
Did you wipe it properly?
Yes, I did.
You don't have poop in your underwear, do you?
I do have poop in my underwear.
What? You have poop in your underwear?
I told you, I do!
You should wipe it properly!
You know, everyone's got shit on their pants!
No, we don't!
Everyone does!
What do you mean, "everyone does"?
I've been counting and counting and eight out of ten people have shit on their pants!
No, we don't!
I can't stand it.
No, you can't stand it!
We can't stand it when you say it!
Out of ten people, let's say one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, up to that number,
and we add up to ten people.
These two people?
Yes!
Even with this, eight people already have shit on their pants!
Well, you do!
I do!
You don't!
What do you mean?
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, up to that number!
You too!
You guys!
No, we don't!
No, you don't!
You're the only one!
What about you?
You're blue!
If you wipe it properly, why can't you use it?
But I don't think it's dirty.
No, it's not about whether it's dirty or not.
If you don't wipe it properly, you can't use it!
And you know, when we just finished, everyone was like, "Did you wash your hands? Did you wash your hands?"
Even if I shit, I don't wash my hands!
Why not?!
Well, you know...
When I was little, I cried.
But I don't think it's dirty.
I don't wash my hands either!
Right?!
When I'm older, I wash my hands even if it's just a little bit.
You know, you guys, let's be more honest.
Don't look at me like I'm a genius.
What do you mean?
If you don't, I'll ask you.
Why do you have to wash your hands after you shit?!
Why are your hands dirty?!
Should I break your head and go?
Then I'll wash it!
I had some time before she came, so I went to the batting centre.
It's amazing! I really thought you were a sportsman!
The speedball didn't hit me at all!
But if it hit me more than this, I'd be called out for a draft.
So I quit.
Who's watching you at the batting centre?
If I quit golf and go to the batting centre...
That's fine.
No, no, no...
You're good!
You're really good!
I heard that you came to get your notebook back!
That's amazing!
So you're going to the batting centre again?
Yes, I am!
You're strong!
No, it's not like that...
I only go to the baseball class for one day.
Yes, yes...
We didn't have any gloves because we were poor.
You went home about to cry, didn't you?
If you're going to learn baseball, at least take some gloves with you!
I don't have any at home...
You're wearing a jersey even though everyone else is wearing a uniform!
Don't say that...
I'm Matsumoto and I just joined today.
Nice to meet you all!
Let's get started!
Let's start with Gaia.
Matsumoto-kun, where are your gloves?
I don't have any...
He doesn't have any gloves!
If you don't have any...
It reminds me of my childhood.
Yes, yes...
It reminds me of when I was with my family in Awaji Island...
I love you!
I don't know what you're talking about...
When I think about it, I start crying.
You didn't say anything when you came back, did you?
I didn't say anything when I came back, did I?
You're going home now. You didn't say anything.
Why is it that when you're sad, you don't have a lot of girls?
You're right.
When I was practicing gymnastics, I was lazy.
I was doing gymnastics.
When I was in elementary school, I was like, "What do you mean lazy? I'm here!"
I was kicked in here.
You were kicked in here?
I was kicked in here!
Ouch, ouch, ouch!
It hurts!
Stop it!
When you're sad, you run like this.
You're right.
When I was pooping, you ran like this.
Poop?
Why do you poop when you're pooping?
I'm scared.
Don't be scared.
Hey!
What are you doing?
What?
What are you doing?
I'm doing it. I'm doing it.
You're sweating.
It's my first time this year.
It's your first time.
What's the rule? Let's decide on a rule.
What rule?
A rule.
What is it?
The winning and losing rule.
The batting rule?
Yes.
There's one more thing about the batting center.
We have professional players.
Do you want me to throw you?
Do you want me to throw you ten times and hit you several times?
That's fine.
Isn't it?
I don't like players who are different.
Why?
You have to be the same player.
I don't like players who are different.
You're a professional player.
You can use me as a match.
What are you talking about?
I'm a professional. I'm a professional in a match.
Are you fast?
No, I'm not.
Are you sure?
It's not like I'm a professional.
What are you thinking about?
Are you a professional in a match?
Of course I am.
How much can you throw?
About 100kg.
But you can't really throw it, can you?
That's right.
But you know...
You know...
You know what?
You know what I'm saying?
Do you think the ball will change?
What are you talking about?
If you can't throw it straight, curve and shoot, you can't do anything.
If you can't do anything, you can't do anything.
You can't do anything.
You can decide how many you want to throw.
I think you're right.
Do you think so?
Are you sure?
Yes.
If you can't shoot, you can't do anything.
What do you mean by "shoot"?
It's like this.
OK, let's do it.
One of these days.
One of these days?
Let's play a penalty game again.
OK.
Let's do it.
What kind of penalty game?
Let's do something more human.
You said you didn't like it, so I said I didn't like it.
Why do you have to change your teeth?
Why do you have to pull out your teeth?
I don't want you to have my teeth!
I only have two front teeth.
I don't like it either.
You have teeth, but I don't.
That's not good. What are you talking about?
Let's think about it again.
I'll do it.
That's decided.
Let's think about what we're going to do next.
Let's break up.
What are you talking about?
You said it!
You have a strange confidence.
I don't have confidence.
You think you can beat me in any sport, don't you?
What?
You said "yes", didn't you?
Yes.
I see.
You think you can't play sports with me, don't you?
I'm in trouble.
I've been underestimated.
Let's play a game instead of betting.
- What do you call it in English? - What?
- What do you call it in English? - You're a team and I'm a team.
But we can't have eight people in a team. We can't have sixteen people in a team.
We can't have that many people in a team.
- Shall we do it like that? - Yes. - That's more fun.
- Shall we do it like that? - Yes.
- What about the penalty game? - Well, if I lose, I can do it alone.
But if the whole team can do it, we can all play a penalty game.
- If you lose, the whole team will be desperate. - Yes.
- If you lose, it won't be funny. - That's right.
- Even the young people in the back. - Yes.
- Right? - Yes. - That's good.
- Let's do it together. - Yes.
- Okay, okay. Let's do it. - Okay? - Let's do it. - Okay? - In the game. - Okay.
- What do you think if you lose? - Well, that's a problem.
I've always wanted to do it once, but let's do it.
Even if you ask me to do it, I won't say yes.
Let's do it like this with saran wrap.
If you lose, don't say anything to the TV.
- Idiot. - What? - Idiot!
- You can't do that. - What if you use a really big TV?
- Like you're heating up meat. - Oh, it's just saran wrap.
- Your body is like... - Stop it!
Good evening.
You have long legs.
I don't have long legs.
You are still the same.
What's your name?
Yamiko Nanada.
How old are you?
Nineteen.
Nineteen years old.
Look at her.
Hey!
It's you.
Come here.
You are pretty old.
Yes.
Do you drink alcohol?
No, I don't.
What's wrong with you?
Thank you very much.
You are great.
Last year, Naoko Nozawa appeared on "Check Heart" radio show.
When they talked about downtown,
she said "hamajan" sometimes resembles "fumiya" and she was happy.
She said "fumiya" resembles "fumiya" and she was happy.
What's wrong with you?
Thank you very much.
What's wrong with you?
I like monsters.
Don't you think so?
Yes, yes.
You really look like a monster.
You know, I feel so sorry for you.
You are wearing a hat like this.
You really look like a monster.
So...
Ah!
Well...
Fumiya has a feminine element called machan.
But Nozawa is a lolicon.
Chinese people like you, right?
Are you a homo or a lolicon?
In your case, it's either one of them.
I like both of them.
You know, I like boys in their second year of elementary school.
Don't say something gross.
What?
You don't trust me at all.
I don't trust you at all.
Really?
Yes.
How can you say I'm a homo?
You are really something.
Well, good evening.
Like you, I'm a homo, too.
Have you ever heard of my homo?
It's like a litmus test paper.
If you eat it, you will...
It reacts immediately.
I hate homos.
You are the worst.
You are a homo, too.
While I'm writing this...
You are a homo, too.
Who made you laugh?
Are you sick?
You are worse than me.
My friends call me "hey, deli".
As it is!
I think it's because you say "bum" that people think you are a homo.
That's why I put a whistle on my butt.
What?
Hello.
Anyway, let's talk about baseball now.
Yes.
This is what I've been thinking about all the time.
I didn't mean it at all and went on stage and it was decided again.
Yes, yes, yes.
I just wanted to say that I'm good at basketball and I'm good at basketball.
But it turned out like this.
But it's okay.
Isn't it interesting?
Yes.
Let's do it.
Yes.
So, next week's opening will be a draft.
Our staff will decide who will pull out and who will be on the team.
This is big.
Yes.
Anyway, we will decide it.
And the team that loses will play basketball.
Yes.
So, everyone watching TV can play basketball with about nine people.
Anyway, if you think about it, it will be big.
I hope you will refer to it.
I'm going to say it.
I'm going to pull out Satsuya-chan's face.
Goman and Gotanda.
Onara.
That's good.
Anyway, please send it.
And my assistants and my mother.
All of you.
Here.
That's it for now.
Next week's opening will be a draft.
Bye-bye.
I envy you.
You're destroying yourself.
Thank you for your hard work.