AISubs v3.5
Tonight is a memorable day.
On the 56th broadcast, President Ariyoshi finally gave us a word of praise!
Ariyoshi akb republic's comedy award show, akb dream max!
You idiot!
Go!
Damn it!
We're being held back by transparent humans!
It's starting to get dark.
Frenchman!
Ariyoshi akb republic's amoeba pig!
A frilled dress with a cute ribbon designed by Kashiwagi Yuki!
On sale now!
Tonight's show is also on air, Ariyoshi akb republic!
Our guests for tonight are...
Team B's Yukirin and Kashiwagi Yuki!
Thank you for having us!
Team B's "b" is what "b" is?
It's akb's "b".
It's akb, right?
Yes!
I see, I see.
Ariyoshi-san, don't you like akb?
Kojima-san, I've never said I like akb.
I can only say this.
I've never said I like akb.
Akb is releasing a new song, do you know about it?
I know about it.
The other day on a quiz show, that question came up.
I said the name of the song and it still hasn't come up.
I was told "next", and I got really mad at akb fans.
"As expected of you, you know a lot!" I got told like that.
You know, right? "everyday".
"everyday" winner.
I'll gradually remember it, so please look forward to it.
Then, please continue.
Yes, this time's project is this.
"akb dream match"!
It's a project to see what kind of story you can make if you combine a talented entertainer and a researcher with no laughing experience.
And among them, it's a project to decide who's number one.
I see, I see.
You can't do manzai or comedy, can you?
That's right. An emergency patient and a comedian.
Oh, it looks a little like it.
And after the VTR, Kojiharu-san will decide who's number one.
I see.
I'm the president, but...
Well, well, it's okay.
It's okay, Kojiharu-san, it's okay.
This time it was like that.
Anyway, please watch the VTR.
What kind of chemical reaction will occur if an akb and a comedian combine?
Before we start, let's watch "akb dream match"!
This time, of course, it's the first time for popular comedians and entertainers to do a story together.
An akb 11th generation will form an instant combination.
It's an innovative project to show a story and decide which combination is the most interesting.
It depends on the comedian.
And the venue where such "akb dream match" will be held is...
"karaoke and party" in Cote d'Azur, Ginza Torido.
In a luxurious room, you can enjoy karaoke and chef's authentic dishes.
And...
The winning duo will receive this dinner voucher from Côte d'Azur.
In addition, for those of you who watched "Ariyoshi AKB Republic" and recommended restaurants for a week from tomorrow...
In stores other than Ginza Korido Store, you can get 1 hour of free room service.
Now, let me introduce the brave entertainers who will team up with AKB.
First of all, those who have more than 600 jokes, "Nanima's Jokes Factory", "Savanna", "Yanimasmi"...
In addition, "King of Comedy", which won first place in "King of Contents" last year...
"Amemiya", which won first place in "R-1S" this year...
"Machine Guns" of "OTAPRO", and other popular entertainers...
These four teams will collaborate with AKB and reveal their stories only for tonight!
Isn't it strange?!
You're not serious about my story!
Each team started with a story meeting and practiced for a short period of time.
What kind of story did they come up with?!
First of all...
The practice was too strict and we cried a little.
That's right.
When Kono-san hit me, I really cried.
I wanted you two to laugh.
You've overcome it, so you definitely want to win.
I'm strong!
Last year's winner of "King of Comedy" is a powerful character that you can't forget at first glance and a brilliant interaction that puts it in calmly.
"King of Comedy" and "Queen of Akamata" who were bitten by red-headed for the first time in "AKB" have formed a combination only for tonight.
What kind of scientific reaction will happen?
Handshake
"Handshake" of "Natori Wakana-chan" of "AKB".
Thank you.
"Handshake" of "Natori Wakana-chan".
Thank you.
Thank you. Next person, please.
I missed you! I missed you! I missed you! That's why I came!
Calm down.
I missed you!
Calm down.
You're a fan, right?
Yes! That's right! That's why I came!
Calm down!
If you're a fan, can you shake hands with me?
Why are you touching my head?
There's a scorpion in my head...
Again?
There's no way there's a scorpion in your head!
It's true!
Don't touch me without my permission!
If you say it like that, you'll get hurt.
You're cute!
You're a good person.
I know you don't like it, but can you shake hands with me?
Then... please.
What should I do?
Next person, please!
"Please," you idiot!
Ouch!
That's funny.
Are you okay, Kana-chan? Is your head okay?
How much do you think this body weighs?
Kana-chan?
You're a fan, right?
Kana-chan!
If you say it like that, you'll get hurt.
You're cute!
I'm glad you're a good person.
Please protect your manners and join us.
It's a handshake party.
Then let's smoke.
Smoking is bad for you.
It's in front of you.
Hurry up and bring it!
Ouch!
It hurt! It hurt!
What's wrong with you?
Kana-chan!
Dis...
Disgusting...
Thank you very much!
She's doing it right.
It's funny.
She's doing it really well.
Nice one!
As expected of the bank girl.
3...
2...
This is funny.
1...
What's wrong with you?
Kana-chan!
She has been active as Savannah's support, and has more than 600 jokes, but she has rarely written a story.
Savannah and Yagima Sumito.
Of course, they have never written a story, but they are a cute duo.
What kind of laughter will these two, beginners in making stories, deliver?
What are you doing?
I've gained weight recently. I should go on a diet. I asked you if I could go on a diet here.
Excuse me!
Yes?
Are you on a diet here?
Yes, we're doing a gag exercise here.
Gag exercise?
We're doing it now, do you want to try it?
Is it okay now?
Yes, please follow me.
Is it okay for me to follow you?
Yes.
Let's go!
Doesn't it look like a train? My armpits are itchy!
Does it work?
Yes, it works! Doesn't it look like a train? My armpits are itchy!
Doesn't it look like a train? My armpits are itchy!
Yes, it still works!
Huh? Huh? Huh?
My heels are happy! It's Friday today!
My heels are happy because it's Friday!
It's Friday today!
Ah, it's really funny.
Nyakka, nyakka, nyakka, nyakka, nyakka, nyakka!
It's only once in 50 years, but do you want to ride it?
You won't ride it, will you?
Damn it!
A transparent human is holding me down!
This is good for your abs!
It's happening!
Let's go!
Kawa...
Ei!
This is Kawaen-san's new joke!
Kawa...
Kawa is jumping over!
Ina and Nasubi are caught!
Emiya!
If I don't win this, I'll retire from Kojima Machines.
Hey! Stop it!
The more they retire, the more confidence they show in their jokes.
They're angry at Yahoo! Chiebukuro's followers.
Kiremanzai's Machines and...
A.k.a. B1's Bricco character, Kojima-Natsuki's duo...
Kojima has never been angry before.
What kind of jokes will he show us with Machines?
What are you looking at?!
What's wrong? Why are you angry?
I'm angry!
Why are you angry?!
Yahoo! Chiebukuro has A.k.a. B1's Bricco character!
Of course we're angry!
Simply put, Yahoo! Chiebukuro is...
Through Yahoo! Chiebukuro, fools ask questions and fools answer!
That's right, Natsuki! Call them!
What's that?!
Question.
I want to join AKB.
Please tell me how to join.
That's not the way!
Answer.
I'll judge you, so give me your purikura.
Who are you?!
What do you want?!
Do you have that kind of power?!
Question.
Please tell me about Watanabe Mayu's house in detail.
That's scary!
That's not the way, you fool!
What are you going to do by asking for her address?!
Answer.
I can't tell you.
Do you know?!
That's not good!
That's really not good!
Question.
Isn't Kojima Natsuki of AKB 11th grade cute?
When I first saw her, I thought she was cute.
Answer.
I like Natsuki too.
Natsun is too cute!
Say something!
Say something, you fool!
Don't be shy, you fool!
Say something!
I couldn't say anything on TV!
Alright!
Let's go home!
Thank you!
Amemiya and Nao only do what they can do.
Amemiya and Nao do a combination?
They sang in their own world and won second place in the R-1 Grand Prix.
Now, during a big break!
Singer-songwriter and comedian Amemiya and...
AKB's number one crybaby girl, Nao Yamaguchi!
For this location, Amemiya prepared a new story.
They can't crush the story that was released for the first time on TV!
Under pressure, Yamaguchi cried.
Will they be able to turn their tears into laughter with Amemiya and Nao?
I'm Amemiya.
I'm Yamaguchi.
When I see various words in the city, I can't help but sing.
For example, "I started frying oysters."
I'm sure there was a story behind these words.
I'm looking forward to it every year for my customers.
Every morning, I turn in my diary.
That's it!
I learned how to make it.
That's good!
It tastes great, too.
But right after that, I had a hangover.
I started frying oysters.
That's good!
You know the lyrics, don't you?
I was able to buy an oyster bar, but...
I started frying oysters.
That's nice!
I caught up with the entrance of my store.
I started frying oysters for my next customer.
Sales are falling day by day.
The part-time workers who quit reading the air.
I don't want it to pass.
My son, who left his oyster here and disappeared.
I started frying oysters.
I'm sad.
I started working in a restaurant again.
I left oysters and disappeared.
I went to work in a restaurant next door.
I was working part-time at home.
My son was suddenly arrested.
I found a picture of my wife's wardrobe in a celebratory magazine.
I started frying oysters.
I want you to imagine this star you saw from space.
I started frying oysters.
I want you to imagine this star you saw from space.
That's great.
That's all for the four teams.
The winning pair will be decided in the studio.
How was it?
I've had many entertainers on this show.
This is the first time I've done it yesterday.
Everything was good.
It's been a while since I felt like I was on TV.
Kojiharu, please choose one of the four teams.
What should I do?
It's difficult.
Everything was good, right?
It's decided.
Kawae-chan and Yagi-san.
Thank you.
Your heel is happy!
It's 50 yen per time, will you ride it?
I won't!
It looks like a train, doesn't it?
What are you going to do? It was fun.
The researchers and comedians did their best, but...
Kashiwagi, you didn't do anything!
You should know how hard it is to make a joke.
I can't do it.
Kashiwagi will be left behind and will be a joke hero.
I can't do it alone.
You should hire a professional comedian.
Shall we hire a professional comedian?
Kojima-san, please.
Please make a joke and air it at the end of the show.
I'll leave the rest to you.
What should I do?
After the recording, a new comedy duo will be born in the Republic of Korea where no one is left.
Hello!
I'm Kojima Harudo, who was found out recently.
Hello! I'm not a hungry idol!
Look! I'm hungry!
I'm Kashiwagi Genki!
Let's say it together!
French juice!
A quick-witted comedy duo, French Bus!
We'll show you their big explosion of jokes at the end of the show!
How about a fantasy phone call with Kashiwagi Yuki-chan?
Hello?
Sorry, I was in the shower and didn't notice.
Oh, right.
It's on sale on the show's mobile site!
Ariyoshi A.K.B. Alliance National Hesenbatsu Tournament!
I'm aiming for the Hesenbatsu Center.
Kashiwagi Yuki is rumored to be black and white.
Is she actually white or black?
The member with the smallest "he" will shine at the Hesenbatsu Center.
The current top is Maeda Ami with 70.3 dB.
Set!
Ready...go!
Ariyoshi A.K.B Alliance National Hesenbatsu Tournament!
Current record...64.6 decibels!
I did it! I did it! I'm so happy! I'm so happy! I did it!
I...was really betting on this today!
Alright, I'm in first place for now.
Kashiwagi Yuki set a new record for today.
Even compared to the other members, her "he" is overwhelmingly small.
I'm sure you can become "he" center.
Your "he" should be fine.
And so, please listen.
"You Should Be Fine" by French Kiss.
A clear sky without a single cloud... Kumo ga hitotsu mo nai tsumimataru sora... The sky where not a single cloud crosses...
Sotto miagetetara yuuki ga waku yo... If you look up gently, you'll get courage...
It was all wet inside my heart... Zubun mure datta mune no oku...
With wind and sunshine as allies... Kaze to hirashi o migata ni shite... With wind and sunshine as allies...
You'll be fine, you can live strong... Kimi nara daijoubu, tsuyoku ikirareru... You'll be fine, you can live strong...
Kowarekaketa kako mo ima mo torimodoseru yo... You can get back the broken past and the present...
You'll be fine, I'm with you... Kimi nara daijoubu, boku ga tsuiteiru... You'll be fine, I'm with you...
Wipe away your tears and look ahead... Namida kuite mae o miyou... Wipe away your tears and look ahead...
No matter what kind of day it is, the future will continue...
Clara and the comedy duo "Frenchbus" present a hilarious story!
It's dark. It's darker than usual.
What is this? What is this?
I'm lonely. What should we do?
What should we do? Combi-members?
Yes, I think it's better to start with a shape like this.
"French kiss" and "sleeveless" and "French ugly"
It will never sell! It will never sell!
It's good, isn't it? As long as it's like this.
We won't do it again, so let's make it "Frenchbus"
I'm not asking you to push my back.
Please follow me.
What they came up with is the theme of last year's election campaign.
One, two... Hello!
I'm Kojimahardo, who's been exposed recently!
Hello! I'm not a naked idol!
Look! My belly is white!
I'm Kashiwagi Genki! Nice to meet you!
Let's say it together! "French ugly"!
Short story "Yuko Oshima"
I'm not asking you to push my back.
Please follow me.
French ugly
No, no! If you really follow me, what will you do?
French ugly
Can we stop now?
Can we stop?
You're making me feel bad.
How about we stop here?
That's enough! Let's do it one more time!